


High On A Hill

by Hermaline75



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Curses, Fluff, Frottage, Goats, M/M, Masturbation, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, Truth Serum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-22
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-03-19 03:58:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 48
Words: 46,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13696413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hermaline75/pseuds/Hermaline75
Summary: You don't meet too many people when you're a herdsman in the mountains.You definitely don't meet too many cursed princes, that's for sure.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do you ever accidently hit post before something is ready? Yeah... Oops. Hit post instead of edit and couldn't work out how to not end up deleting the whole thing so...

Thor loved his goats. He did. Like a mother loved their children. Big, hairy, grumpy, stupid children...

Smarter than sheep, of course. He would always fight that point when he drove them down to the market and met the shepherds, who seemed to believe that producing wool made up for their charges' complete and utter lack of sense.

Then again, it was easy to defend them at the summer market. Much easier to curse them when the wind and the snow had blown in, and instead of coming back to the hut, the stupid things had gone gallivanting off into the forest instead.

His hair whipped about in the howling gale, coat turned up around his face and hat pulled right down, struggling step after step to keep moving. Just get the goats, drag them back. How hard could it be? Just had to convince one and the rest would follow. They were herd animals after all.

He really ought to get a dog one of these days.

The sun would be down soon. If he couldn't catch them, he might have to let them take their chances. The whole day had been dull anyway, the snow not letting up. Would he even be able to get back? He daren't look at how covered his foot prints might be already...

Was that a track through the snow? Hard to be sure. It could merely be drifting, or worse, the prints of a wolf or a bear. Still, better than nothing.

Ice crystals had formed on his lashes and beard, his own breath freezing, when he heard a faint, plaintive bleating. He stopped dead, straining his ears, trying to listen, trying to pin point the direction it was coming from.

A goat stumbled out of the trees in front of him, clumps of snow all over her hair and body, big, strange eyes staring around.

"You stupid thing," Thor muttered, pulling his tether from his pocket. "Come here, girl. Come here."

She let him approach, wary, but attempted to flee as soon as he tried to get the leather strap over her head, tripping over her own feet and falling face-first into the snow.

Thor dived onto her back, wary of her flailing hooves. They could slice a man's belly open or deliver a nasty kick if you didn't know how to handle them.

"I'm trying to help, you dumb... Come here."

With no small struggle, he wrestled the tie over her head, getting louder bleats for his trouble, only for her to then get up and shake and calmly start to follow him like there was nothing wrong at all.

"So much fuss for nothing," Thor muttered. "Come on, you. Where's your friends?"

They gradually came out in ones and twos, stumbling and shivering. Wretched things. Still, at least they were following. That was the important thing.

He'd got them to the edge of the forest, almost within sight of home, when he spotted it. A large black billy, stark against the landscape. Not one of his. And valuable-looking. Very much so.

Someone would be missing this goat. Someone would be very grateful for its safe return.

Thor looked at his little herd and made a decision, gingerly letting the slipknot of his tether unwind and approaching the strange newcomer, clicking his tongue and trying to sound soothing, keeping his voice low.

"Hey..." he whispered. "Hello. It's alright, I won't hurt you."

The goat looked at him and cocked its head to the side. Not running though. That was a good sign.

"Easy now..."

It snapped at him, huge teeth closing just short of his hands. He'd never seen a goat do that before. Almost... Almost like a warning.

They weren't smart enough to make threats though. Must have just missed.

"Easy! I'm just trying to take you somewhere warm."

It looked at him again and then turned, rushing off down the hill. Ugh... Such a handsome beast as well. A real shame.

Unless... Was it running for the hut? And butting the door?

Unable to quite believe what he was seeing, Thor raced after it, concerned for the safety of his home. They'd all freeze out here if he wasn't careful.

"Hey!" he yelled. "Hey, hey!"

It turned, looked at him, looked at the door, and bleated. Loudly. Like it was blaming him for it being locked.

"For goodness' sake..." Thor growled, scrabbling for the keys around his neck and unlocking the door. "There. In, in."

At least the other goats had followed, recognising home maybe, or at least able to smell a turnip or two. Thor bustled them inside and heaved the door closed, pulling down the sheet of heavy wool he used to keep out the draughts.

It was strange, suddenly being in the peace and stillness of his little home, warm compared to the approaching snow storm outside.

It was stranger still to notice the new goat had managed to get at the wood pile and was picking up a log in its teeth.

"No!" Thor said firmly. "Don't eat that. Not food."

As if it could understand him, the strange goat gave him a look that could almost be described as withering before spitting the log into his little fireplace. Like it knew...

Right...

Well, clearly he was imagining things.

Still, as he lit the fire, the new goat wasted no time in securing the best spot, back steaming as it dried out. And it seemed distinctly more interested in his food than in the chunks of raw turnip and straw that the other goats happily ate from his hand with their strange, leathery lips.

Normally, Thor slept above the goats on a platform above the main room, all too aware of the jokes and innuendo thrown around about men like him. So far away from women, accompanied only by goats? Positively unnatural.

But say what you would about goats, they generated a lot of heat. Many was a cold night that would have been much worse if he'd tried to tough it out alone.

No, given the sound of that storm, he was going to need to drag down his blankets and bed down on the floor, and hope he didn't get trodden or drooled on.

He'd taken off his wet outer layers and took the time to put on an extra pair of socks before setting in, half the goats already snuffling and snoring.

Just as he got settled, the new goat nudged into his back, apparently figuring he would be the best bet for warmth.

"Yeah, yeah," Thor mumbled, exhaustion seeping out of his bones. "I'll try to find out who you belong to in the morning."

It was still dark when he woke. Not unusual for the time of year.

It was unusual to have woken because one of the goats had stolen his blanket though.


	2. Chapter 2

Thor rolled onto his stomach, groaning slightly.

"I swear, if one of you has eaten it..."

He couldn't see a thing, wasn't about to try getting to the candle, and instead just felt around for his missing cover to steal it back.

Goat... Goat... Hoof... Hand... Ah, blanket.

Wait...

Tentatively, he reached out again. That was skin. And not goat skin, but human. Distinctly so, smooth with only a light dusting of hair.

That made no sense at all.

Still not entirely sure he wasn't imagining things, Thor rose to a crouch and carefully felt his way to the table, his hands trembling as he struggled to strike a match.

The flame flared and steadied in his fingers, flickering as he brought it to his stubby candle, holding it high.

Well, for some reason, there was a man asleep on his floor. Dark-haired and beautiful, pink lips slightly parted, fine cheekbones.

And quite, quite naked. His modesty appeared to only be maintained by Thor's blanket, a long bare leg and shapely arms clutching at the scratchy wool.

How in the world had he got here? The door had not opened as far as he knew and surely he would have woken to such a thing. No one could have got through that storm. The nearest town was almost three miles away.

Besides, there were no clothes anywhere that he could see... Even if someone had got through the snow, they definitely couldn't have done it without several thick layers.

Maybe this was just a very, very vivid dream?

The man shivered and stirred, his eyes flickering slightly before opening, fixing Thor with a long stare.

"Ah..." he said before clearing his throat. "Thought I'd be able to sneak out before you woke. Rest assured that I mean you no harm."

His voice was deep and smooth, more like the lords who occasionally showed their faces at the larger county fairs than his fellow farmers and herders.

"Without clothes?" Thor asked, doing his best not to stare.

The man glanced down at himself and blinked a few times, opening and closing his mouth as he evidently tried to think of an explanation.

"Would you believe I have a cache of clothes hidden in the woods?"

"No," Thor said immediately.

"Why not?"

"Because that would suggest you took all your clothes off and made your way here, getting in without waking me or tripping over any goats and all in the dark and the cold. Which seems to me highly unlikely."

The man sighed, rearranging the blanket so it covered him more fully. He was probably freezing, intruder or not.

"Would you like to borrow some clothes while you tell me who you are?" Thor asked.

"I told you I mean no harm. What else do you need to know?"

"Your name, for one."

The man tilted his head to the side.

"I don't know yours either, might I note."

"It's Thor. And you?"

"Loki."

The name sounded vaguely familiar, but Thor wasn't sure why exactly. Maybe he'd met one before. Or heard the name somewhere else. It would come back to him.

"Could I... trouble you for a jumper, Mr Thor?"

More than that. He might be an unexpected host, but he at least liked to think he was a good one. He climbed the ladder to his usual bed space and opened his trunk, instinctive in the faint light. Long johns, shirt, thick socks, all tossed down from above. 

Loki coughed.

"Might I ask... when these things were last washed?"

"Oh, recently. I sent them to the laundry women barely two months ago."

"Two months?!"

"Are you cold or not?"

A huff and a sigh and Thor made a point of looking away while he got dressed, coming back down the steps with the promised jumper, a nice one, well made and patterned.

"So..." he said expectantly.

"Yes, you're quite right. We ought to try to get a few more hours' sleep."

Stubborn, huh? Well, maybe he'd let it lie for the night, but soon he'd learn he shouldn't have challenged a goatherd.

Actually speaking of which...

"Where's the billy gone?"

"I'm going to sleep even if you're not."

Thor looked around in the glimmering light, finding only his own goats slumbering away.

"You didn't see a big, black goat when you came in? Did it manage to get past you somehow?"

"If it's gone then I expect it must have done. You know goats. Escape from anywhere given half a chance."

Poor, stupid thing. It would be frozen outside. Be a miracle if he found it alive in the morning. He wasn't going out there now; he'd have no hope of finding it in the dark.

Thor blew out the candle, sighing as he carefully made his way back across the floor and tried to stake a claim on half the blanket.

"Shame. Someone will be missing him come springtime. Handsome boy like that would have been quite the draw at the county fair. Bright eyes, good strong flanks. Good breeding, if I'm any judge."

"And that's important, is it?"

What an oddly bitter tone. Probably just wanted him to be quiet and go back to sleep.

"It is if you want healthy kids."

He left it at that, drifting off again though keen to solve the mystery come daybreak, woken by one of the goats nibbling at his fingers. Funny how sometimes they seemed to understand the routine.

Loki was still asleep and Thor let him unconsciously grip the blanket as he got the pail down from its hook and let his charges fight over who got milked first. It had to be uncomfortable, being so full, for this was about the only time they were ever obedient.

Even if they did seem determined to kick the pail over at any given opportunity...

It was a peaceful task all the same. Repetitive. Gentle. The sound of milk against metal comforting somehow.

He heard Loki stir, his form just visible in the early dawn glimmers.

"What's that sound?"

"Milking the goats before letting them out."

"And do you... drink it?"

"I'll mix up some porridge once they're outside. You're welcome to have some."

A pause, punctuated by Thor's steady motions, easing the milk out with practised ease.

"Have you a bath?" Loki asked.

"I have a rag and a water butt."

"You... You don't bathe?"

"Of course I do! In summer. But in this weather, being wet is a sure way to catch a chill. It's round the back if you want to take a bowl and fetch some. I wouldn't recommend washing out in the open, and there'll be space enough over the fire to heat it for you."

He heard Loki get up, stumbling a little with the lack of light, feeling his way to the table and then one of Thor's large earthenware dishes.

"Won't they escape if I open the door? The goats, I mean."

"One or two might venture out, but it's cold. They'll probably need encouragement."

The sun seemed very bright, reflecting off the snow as Loki opened the door, silhouetted in clothes much, much too big for him. He even slipped on a pair of Thor's boots before stomping into it.

It was strange, how long he was out for. It didn't take that long to fetch water, even if you had to smash the ice first. Thor frowned, hurrying to finish milking his last goat and carefully putting the pail on the table out of harm's way before checking on him.

Footprints exited the house but turned right towards the forest, a long line of them. What in the world was he doing up there?

Thor pulled on a coat and found his summer shoes - better than nothing - and hurried after him, calling his name.

Eventually, he found his clothes neatly folded, his boots placed nearby, right by the frozen stream.

Was he bathing? Surely not. And yet there were distinct signs of the ice having been broken.

Thor followed the little river for a while, but he could find no sign of human footprints. A deer, maybe. Something had come out of the water, but, well... Nothing walking on two legs.

He returned to his clothes and only then did he realise there was a message made of twigs laid on top of the snow.

Looked like... _THANK_? Thank you, maybe it was meant to say?

Hmm...

What a strange man.


	3. Chapter 3

The mystery preyed on Thor's mind all morning. People did not just vanish. It was impossible. Wherever Loki had gone, he clearly did not want to be followed. Maybe he did have clothes hidden in the woods after all. But if that was so then why had he been naked? How had he got in? 

It didn't make sense.

At least the snow had stopped falling for now, bright sunshine helping him set up a temporary boundary to encourage the goats to stay close to home. Having to bribe them with turnips was worth it not to have to spend another evening chasing them through the forest.

He wasn't expecting anyone to drop by, but they were evidently worrying about him in such inclement weather as in the early afternoon he heard the distinctive sound of Brunnhilde yodelling towards him.

Well... He said yodelling. No matter how often Sif tried to teach her the traditional phrases, she always made up her own pattern of noises. He waved to her as she came into view, stepping inside to poke up the fire and set some water to heat.

"Survived the night, I see," she said, kicking the snow off her boots before stepping inside.

"Very comfortably," Thor said, putting down a hot tea. "But strangely indeed."

"Oh, really? How?"

"I woke to find a man here. A stranger. No clothes and a voice like velvet. He slept here and set out to bathe this morning and... And vanished, as best I can tell."

She raised her eyebrows a little, scooping a spoonful of goat's milk into her cup straight from the pail.

"A dream, surely?"

"I don't think so."

"So you let a naked man go outside in this weather?"

"Of course not. I leant him some clothes. Which he very carefully folded up for me to collect from the woods."

She was visibly trying not to laugh at him, clearly thinking he'd had some kind of intense fantasy, sipping to try to cover it.

"And did he have a name, this definitely-not-a-dream nude stranger?"

Thor could feel himself blushing. She knew he had a predilection towards men rather than women. It would be typical of him to wish for someone handsome to help him through the cold.

"Said his name was Loki," he mumbled.

And now she really was laughing.

"Loki? The long lost prince of Erfundorf? Here? You really must have been dreaming."

Of course! That's why the name sounded so familiar. But that was just a story, he thought anyway. Wasn't there something about fairies involved? Or a witch or something?

"He did seem a bit... you know. Well spoken. Any idea what the king and queen look like?"

She shrugged.

"Never seen them. I think they've been a bit reclusive since the lost him. But what's the likelihood that a prince missing for nearly twenty years showed up naked in your hut and then vanished into thin air?"

True. Hardly the most logical thing to happen.

Could he have dreamed it? It had seemed very real at the time. And he'd milked the goats before finding the clothes. They were drinking the proceeds of that task; he hadn't imagined doing that. So unless he'd fallen back to sleep afterwards or dreamed it while awake...

Or put the clothes out there himself and forgotten he'd done it...

That was a particularly worrying thought. They did say some people went strange after a few too many years alone in the mountains, didn't they?

He forced a smile.

"You know, maybe you're right," he said. "Must have imagined it. How's Sif?"

A classic bit of distraction. Thor remembered Brunnhilde arriving back in the town of their birth, a stranger from having been away travelling for so long, and how Sif's jaw had dropped to see her. How long had it been? Ten years? Fifteen? Back to work her grandfather's business, tanning and working leather. No care about the job being dirty or unladylike. She worked on the edge of town, by the river, trying not to offend too much.

And some time later she announced she needed an assistant to help with trade and manufacture and Sif suddenly was very, very interested in such crafts, almost suspiciously so...

If anyone in the village suspected they were anything but good friends, they weren't saying a word.

"Oh, you know, she's got it into her head that we should learn to make ladies' gloves and line them with wool or rabbit skin. Very elegant, she says. I think she's just cold and hinting at something she likes the idea of. Maybe for her birthday I could draw up a pattern."

"I've got some dung for you outside, but I think it might be frozen."

"All the better. Save me smelling it all the way home. And I have some cheese for you and a milk order from half my regulars..."

It was a good system. They handled his business in town and in return he gave them all the goat by-products he could for their work and a little milk on the side. And they were dear friends - something he wouldn't mind a few more of.

And maybe sometimes he envied what Sif and Brunnhilde had. Someone to go home to. Someone to love.

But there was no sense in moping about it when there were fences to mend around the turnip patch and snow to shovel to reveal at least a few shoots of grass for his girls to eat.

"Is that one of yours?" Brunnhilde asked as they swapped her package for his distinctly more unpleasant ones.

"Hmm?"

"That goat over by the trees? Big black thing. I don't think I've seen it before, that's all."

Thor gasped and grinned.

"He's back! I mean... No, he's not mine, but I saw him yesterday. I thought for sure the cold would get him overnight. Clever thing must have found a fallen tree or a burrow to shelter in."

She smiled wryly at him excitement.

"Have fun with your new friend," she said. "I'll be back before the end of the week probably."

She pat him on the back and set off for home, keen to get back before the meagre sunlight hours ran away or the snow started up again.

Thor looked up at the strange goat as he got out his big shovel.

"Come on down," he said under his breath. "I'll keep a closer eye on you this time."


	4. Chapter 4

Children loved playing in the snow, Thor knew. He'd spent plenty hours himself building snowmen or fighting guerilla campaigns of snowball fights with Sif and the others round about.

And he could still find some fun in his work building great piles of it up around his home, like a boundary wall. The goats danced around him, falling on any stubby blades of grass he managed to unearth in a frenzy.

He spotted his new friend from time to time, skirting around the treeline. He pretended not to though. Animals were far more likely to approach if they felt safe. No, no, Mr Goat, I'm not watching you at all. I'm just minding my own business, but see this grass? You could have some of this grass.

Mm, mm, mm, delicious grass...

No? No grass? Alright, enjoy your bark, then.

He went inside around the middle of the afternoon for an early dinner, vegetable stew leftover from last night with rye bread and some of the cheese Sif had sent. Made from his very own goats' milk. Creamy. Delicious.

And when he poked his head outside again, just as it was starting to get dark, who was there? Why, of course, Mr I-Don't-Want-Any-Grass.

He didn't seem too impressed by Thor's handiwork though, kicking at the ground and only occasionally nibbling at the dull frozen greenery.

"Hungry?" Thor asked, trying not to spook him again. "Want some turnip?"

The female goats definitely wanted some turnip. He took the opportunity to lure them all inside. The billy, though... He seemed to be hesitant.

"No turnip?" Thor said. "I've got... Hmm..."

He had a little rummage in his larder while the other goats chomped happily on their favourite treat.

"Bread?" he tried, holding some out."

Ah, that passed muster. It took a little more effort to convince him to come inside and only then was he able to get the door shut.

Still with bread hanging from its jaws, the goat span round, eyes rolling.

"It's alright," Thor said. "See? It's warm in here. Warm and safe."

Evidently it did not like being restrained. It went to the door and seemed to test it with a shoulder before winding up to butt with its head.

"Hey!" Thor yelled, trying to scare it.

No chance. The other goats looked at him warily, as though asking why he'd brought a violent stranger into their midst.

Another butt, horns gouging the surface of the wood.

"Stop that," Thor said. "You'll hurt yourself!"

A third strike. He couldn't just sit by and watch, if not for the animal's sake then for the health of his door.

He grabbed a rope and looped it into a tether, sneaking up from behind and leaping...

His knees crashed into the floor with no small degree of pain, grunting and flailing. The goat skidded off to the other side of the hut, rearing up at the window, scrabbling at it.

Thor growled, feinting left and right as he tried to get close enough to make another attempt.

The goat gave him a murderous look and turned its back, ready to kick him evidently. But that meant he could get in its blind spot and lunge...

God above, that was a heavy goat. Strong, too. He wrestled with it hard, the others bleating in alarm as he used the strength of his legs to hold its struggles and lash its limbs together.

"I'm sorry," he grunted. "But it's for your own good, I promise..."

Eventually, he had it well and truly tied. Not that that stopped it trying to break free, rolling and kicking, bleating angrily. He stroked its neck, trying to calm it, but his soothing only seemed to make things worse.

But, at length, it grew quiet. Tired, perhaps. Stopped moving. Flopped down and sighed.

And then it made the strangest sound. A long, drawn-out bleat, almost sobbing. Like it was crying.

Thor was distressed by it, worried the poor beast had been injured. There was no sign of blood that he could see, and he couldn't feel anything obviously broken... And still it cried. Cried itself to sleep.

It was deeply concerning. He'd been around goats for years, seen all kinds of illnesses and injury, but he'd never heard one make a sound like that. He ought to check on it during the night, ensure it didn't need medical attention.

Did he need to sleep down with the goats? It was cold, but the wind had subsided and with it the worst of the draughts. He could probably use his own bed.

He'd just settled down when he heard it. A faint sigh, a grunt and then the distinct sound of sobbing.

That was no goat's cry...

He scrambled back down the steps and to his candle, striking a match urgently.

And came face to face with Loki once again. Only this time, tied up. And crying.

Oh...

Oh, this was not good, was it?


	5. Chapter 5

Thor leapt forward to undo the ropes instantly, apologies stumbling over one another as he tried to say them all at once, horrified by what he seemed to have done. He didn't understand how he'd done it, but all the same.

"You're frozen," he managed to say. "Come up to the blankets and get warm. I'm so sorry."

This made no sense. One minute a goat and then the next a human? How was that possible?

Admittedly, it would explain a few things...

Loki continued to sob as Thor helped him to the ladder, trying his best not to look at his body too much.

"Clothes are in the trunk," he said before turning to his fire. A hot drink, that would help, surely.

His mind was whirling. How did the old story go? The one about the missing prince of Erfundorf? The king and queen held a party for his twelfth birthday and angered a local crone or sorcerer or fae or something who cursed the child and soon afterwards the young boy vanished without trace?

But it was just that, a story! Yes, the prince gone missing, but, well, that happened sometimes without any supernatural involvement. Something bad had happened and then rumours had spread as they always did and that was that.

Brunnhilde had taken all the milk down to the town, but surely plain tea was better than nothing. The shadows danced wildly as he made his way back across the floor, stepping around the goats and standing on tiptoe to put everything safely on the upper level before climbing the ladder.

"Here now," he said, putting the candle on the chest and creeping forward with the cup held out. "We'll soon get you warm."

Loki had put on what looked like half his wardrobe and had pulled the blankets right up to his chin. And was still shivering, looking unsure but then seizing the drink gratefully.

Thor tried a smile. Waited for him to speak. Hoped for an explanation.

Loki sipped quietly and wiped his face and then mumbled something about this being a very strange dream indeed.

It was an obvious lie and Thor did his best not to laugh, steeling his features into what he hoped was a friendly and earnest expression.

"Are you Prince Loki of Erfundorf?" he asked.

The scoff was only just given away by his wide eyes. Thor thought they were approximately the same age, but Loki seemed younger somehow.

"No," he said. "No, I'm a different Loki."

Sitting carefully on the end of his straw mattress, Thor tried to channel something of his mother's tone, a gentle suggestion that maybe the truth ought to be told now.

"I won't tell anyone," he said. "You can trust me. I mean you no more harm than you mean me."

Loki turned his chin up in a very goat-like manner.

"Those ropes hurt," he said. "I may just mean you harm after all."

"I'm sorry," Thor said again, meaning it. "I was afraid you would hurt yourself. Besides, the cold out there could easily be deadly, even to a... Whatever you are. A were-goat?"

And now Loki was insulted. Good. Might let something slip if he spoke without thinking.

"I'm not a were-goat! I didn't let some rabid ungulate bite me. I'm cursed, that's all."

"A goat in the day and a human at night?"

Rolling eyes.

"You saw me human during the day, didn't you? It's a twelve-hour cycle more or less, but the beginning and ending varies hugely. I don't know what exactly causes it. And, believe me, I have tried to understand. I have undergone numerous tests and none of them could give a satisfactory answer. The waxing moon, waning moon, tides, sunset, air pressure... Nothing seems to match it. Best guess is it adheres to some kind of internal clock."

"And who did these tests?"

"The finest doctors and sages in the whole continent, obviously."

"And that's not at all because you're the prince of Erfundorf, right?"

Loki opened his mouth and then closed it again and downed the rest of his tea, snuggling back into the blankets.

"You promise you won't tell?" he asked in a small voice.

"I'm a goatherd. Who would I tell?"

"The woman who was here today. You could tell her."

"She's a friend. But I would lie to her all the same to keep a secret."

Hesitation. They were strangers, but he already knew the biggest part, surely? The transformation was surely what he would want to hide.

"Blow out the candle," Loki said. "Stop looking at me. I'm cold."

Thor did as he wished and joined him under the covers, adding his body heat to help. They were both clothed in many layers and had done much the same last night, so he hoped such an action wouldn't seem presumptuous.

It was a long time before Loki began to speak.

"I am who you think," he whispered. "And I was cursed when I was twelve. It was meant to be a celebration. But my parents irritated the wrong person, as monarchs often do, and I was cursed to live half my life as a goat."

"Why a goat?"

"No idea. I was rather too busy overtuning tables with my suddenly arrived hind legs to ask."

"Sorry."

An indignant sigh.

"Anyway, I have finally grown tired of their constant experiments and run away. I had thought that this far maybe I had outrun the news of my disappearance, but evidently not."

"Well, it has been nearly two decades. News may be slow but not that slow."

He felt Loki sit up next to him, alarmed.

"What are you talking about?" he asked. "I left barely a week ago."

Thor frowned for all he couldn't be seen.

"Prince Loki of Erfundorf has been missing since a week past his birthday. There were vast search parties. Rewards offered. I remember it well. I was around the same age and my mother was very moved by the tale."

Loki went quiet and lay down again.

"There must be some kind of mistake. A different prince maybe. I've been living in the palace."

"But have you been out of the palace in that time? Seen the people? As far as I know, no one has seen you in nearly twenty years."

He waited for Loki to tell him again that he was wrong, but only got a damp sigh.

"I'm too tired to talk any more," he said, rolling over.

Thor was tempted to wrap an arm around him, but it seemed rather forward and potentially unwanted.

Because it was clear now what had happened after the curse. Prince Loki had never been missing.

He'd been hidden.


	6. Chapter 6

Mmm, arms wrapped around him. That was nice. Oh, it had been so long since he'd last...

Wait...

Loki's presence came back to him in a rush. Not a dream. A very, very strange reality.

He had a runaway prince in his bed, who would soon be turning into a goat. Right. Right. Normal. Who had snuggled into him during the night. Normal.

Gentle peeling was enough to free him from Loki's embrace, and yet he was still held. Was that a leg hooked around him? Oh, dear.

Carefully, carefully, he managed to extract himself and get down the ladder, feeling his way around for the bucket and settling himself onto the stool to begin milking. Would Loki have enough time for breakfast before he changed? Who knew?

The steady action of milking let his mind try to sort through everything. People had always told him he was too accepting for his own good. He'd always believed in stories and fables, but he reasoned that he didn't know so much about the world beyond his horizons so who knew what was out there? You heard of great ships crewed by a hundred men, of whales the size of houses, of strange creatures and myriad cultures and all kinds of things. If he could believe in the planets once he'd seen their wandering journey across the sky for himself then why not a curse?

His mother had always said there was more to old stories than people believed. That the land had power and nature could do miracles. Bones could heal, rivers change course, plants grow back even after fire.

"Do not mock them," she used to say. "We might have new words for the same thing or a better understanding now, but we should not dismiss all that our ancestors have tried to tell us. And remember, one day people will look back at us and laugh too."

He hadn't seen it, but he'd been in the room when a goat become a man. While he wasn't exactly going to spread the word, strange things did happen.

Not generally this strange, admittedly...

He'd nearly finished the milking when he heard Loki sigh and groan.

"Good morning. Breakfast?"

"What have you got?"

"Oats for porridge. Bread. Cheese. Turnip, though I've not boiled any. Probably have some other vegetables and dried meat somewhere about the place."

"Would you make the porridge with milk? Goat's milk?"

"Of course."

"Could you... make it a different way?"

"Well, I could use water I suppose. Why?"

"Oddly enough I feel a little strange about eating products from an animal I am some of the time. Would you drink human's milk?"

Well, that was a question he'd never considered...

"So cow's milk would be fine?"

"Yes. Do you have cow's milk by any chance?"

"Nope. Don't have any cows. Only goats, I'm afraid."

If Thor wasn't mistaken, the ensuing silence was distinctly huffy.

"I'll make it with water," he said, even though it would make something closer to gruel than porridge.

The snow had frozen more solid overnight and crunched under his feet as he went to the water butt, getting enough to cook with and to wash. After all, he was hosting a prince now. He might be more keen on hygiene than most.

Of course, he was probably used to better food too but there was little he could do about that.

"Can I stay here?" Loki asked when he reappeared and closed the door. "For a while?"

A young man in need asking to stay? Well, it was his duty to assist.

"Of course. I know I haven't got much, but..."

"I'd rather be starving out here than still in the palace, believe me."

That was ominous. What had they been doing to him up there?

Distract, his instincts said, as he set about cooking quickly, wary of the time passing before Loki managed to eat.

"Can you talk to my goats?" he asked. "When you are one, I mean."

He got the bread out as well, not missing how hungry Loki seemed as he tore off a corner of it.

"I'd never met actual goats before," he said. "But no. I don't think we speak the same language. I understood you though. It's hard to describe. I'm still myself, just in a goat. It's very frustrating."

It sounded awful. No wonder he considered it a curse.

And to have run away from a life of comfort and luxury... Though he wasn't going to ask just yet, Thor was concerned that he hadn't been tired of the attempts to lift the curse so much as scared. And of what? Something bad, clearly.

"You're welcome to stay as long as you want," he said decisively. "Maybe you can even help me. They're sweet creatures, the goats, but they do have a terrible habit of wandering off."

He heard Loki scoff behind him as he stirred the gruel quickly.

"I'm not a sheep dog."

"No. You're a highly intelligent goat."

"If you meant that as a compliment, you have much to learn about the art."

Thor tried not to laugh. So prickly! Still, breakfast was thick enough for him to spoon out two bowls and deliver it with a flourish.

Loki looked at it, his lips thin, blinking rapidly.

"No sugar?" he asked.

"I might have some raisins somewhere if that will do?"

He had never seen someone so hesitant. Loki stirred it uncertainly, ensuring good dispersion of the fruit, and took a small spoonful, making quite a face.

"I know it's not the nicest," Thor said. "But it's hot and filling."

Loki nodded vaguely and finished most of his bowl before doubling over, gasping.

"Are you alright?" Thor asked. "Too hot?"

"No... It's just... It's upon me."

For a second, Thor wasn't sure what he meant, but then he began pulling off his clothes and he realised.

He was about to see a man become a goat right in front of his eyes.

Normal. Totally normal.


	7. Chapter 7

Bizarrely, it reminded Thor a little of childbirth. His mother had been a midwife and he'd seen enough women show up to the house when he was a child and later assisted her during visits by boiling water and helping panicked fathers fold clean linens. The panting, the groans of pain, it seemed familiar but different. He helped Loki as best he could, assisting with buttons and ties, piling the clothes on a chair.

Loki moved to all fours, crying out, eyes darting perhaps embarrassed by his nudity. Thor wasn't sure, instinctively trying to comfort him, stroking his back even as thick black hair began to spread from his head down his spine.

Yes, suddenly was no longer quite so much like childbirth. That didn't involve nails lengthening and clumping into hooves or horns sprouting spontaneously out of skulls.

Loki moaned and took long, desperate gulps of air. It was amazing Thor hadn't heard him yesterday, far away though he was. His spine seemed to shrink a little, his face jutting forward to make room for larger teeth, his eyes seeming almost to swirl as his pupils stretched and reformed as strange black ovals and suddenly... he was a goat. As ordinary looking as all the rest.

Thor sat back on his heels, stunned, breathless. That was certainly not something he had ever expected to see. Loki turned to face him, his strange new jaw turned slightly upwards.

Waiting for rejection, maybe?

"Would you like the rest of your porridge?" Thor asked.

A baleful stare and a bleat. Right.

"One baa for yes, two for no?"

"Behhh..."

"Was that a yes?"

"BEH!"

Thor duly brought his bowl down and watched him practically inhale the remaining contents. Maybe it tasted better on a goat's tongue. They seemed to eat most anything, after all.

Loki finished it in seconds, kicking at the bowl and making snuffling noises.

"More?"

"Beh."

"Alright."

Thor wouldn't normally use so many oats in one day, but the poor thing had evidently been out in the tundra with very little to live on, running scared. He could give him the lion's share to help boost his strength.

Though if he was going to have another mouth to feed long-term, he'd have to start budgeting more carefully. And he'd have to hide the fact that he had a new house guest from Sif and Brunhilde, of course.

Loki finished his breakfast and took one look outside before evidently deciding it was too cold to go out and curling up in a corner for a nap. Thor had never seen a goat try to curl up into a ball before. It was cute, in a strange way.

He heated some water to wash with. Not to boiling point and he didn't have any soap to use anyway. Even with the door closed, it was an unpleasant thing indeed to have to strip to the waist and wring out his cloth.

It was at times like this that he longed for summer. Going out to the stream, getting water all over his body, swimming and getting rid of old grey skin cells. Getting down the proper wash tub and spending a whole evening heating water and grating soap and getting really, properly clean. Washing his hair so that it turned as gold as the sun.

Loki watched him scrub down, probably horrified by what he was seeing, such meagre ablutions. Better than nothing, though. And it made him feel a little fresher, even if he had to put his lived-in clothes back on.

Clearly judging him, Loki sighed a goaty little sigh, and lay down to sleep again.

Right, Thor thought, keeping another person for an undefined amount of time. He'd need more food and therefore more money. And for that, he'd need more to sell...

The goats could not produce more milk than they already did. And he did not want to charge Sif and Brunhilde for the... products they took off his hands. They were friends and provided him services in kind and they would be very much within their rights to charge him as well if they wished, and then he'd be back to his first problem.

What other resources did he have? Not much at this time of year. He sometimes grew a few excess turnips, but for now he needed all the ones in his barrel to sustain the goats. Besides, they were likely unfit for human consumption by now.

His eyes fell on the woodpile. He'd need to get more soon.

And that was something, wasn't it? He had the muscle and time to chop logs. Good logs, ones that would burn for a long, long time.

Might be worth a try, especially if he brought them inside to dry, ready for collection.

Not that he thought Sif and Brunhilde would appreciate being given extra heavy lifting too much.

He spent the morning shoveling more snow to ensure fresher grass, ate lunch with Loki at his feet eating the same meal he was having - minus the goats cheese, of course - and then set out to find a likely looking tree.

You had to judge these things carefully. Too big and you'd risk injury and causing too much damage. Too small and you'd reduce the forest's natutal regeneration.

Evidently more alert having eaten, Loki trotted after him, curious about what he was up to.

"Firewood," he said vaguely. "Got to keep warm."

It almost seemed like Loki was exploring. If he'd been kept in the palace for years and years, everything was probably very interesting to him.

With that thought in mind, as Thor found a likely candidate for chopping, he was beginning to be nervous. How long before someone came looking for the lost prince? They couldn't admit to hiding him, but they could renew the search, come up for some excuse for it. An anniversary perhaps

He swung the axe slowly and deliberately, the dull sound of iron hitting wood echoing off the snow.

If Loki didn't want to go back, he must have a reason. That was only logical, right? And though they'd only know each other two days, not even that, Thor couldn't help but feel protective towards the young prince. He had no idea about life out here! He needed to be looked after.

The tree slowly creaked to the ground and Thor hoisted it onto his shoulder to drag home. It would take him a while to process it, especially with the light already fading. Still, he'd have some good bundles made up before the end of the week.

He was cooking dinner deliberately late when Loki changed back with a sigh, hurriedly covering his body. The reverse process seemed much quicker and quieter.

"Evening," Thor said, like nothing was out of the ordinary. "I was hoping we could eat together. Talk a little."

"About what?" Loki asked, slightly suspicious.

"Whatever you want. I don't tend get a lot of conversation out here."

Maybe he was being a little underhand in hoping to gain Loki's trust like this and find out why exactly he'd left his home. But it was true. He never really got to chat with anyone, not for a proper, long time. It was nice to hear someone else's voice.

Even if only at night.


	8. Chapter 8

Days later, when the tree had been reduced to a pile of logs in the corner and some of the snow had begun to melt, Loki stirred his dinner of broth and frowned, puzzled.

"Is this all you do, then?" he asked.

"Hmm?"

"You milk the goats, chop the wood, repair things, eat and sleep and that's it?"

"It's winter. There's not really much else that needs to happen except keeping an eye on them. Making sure their kids are growing as expected."

"They're pregnant?"

"From late summer. They can breed at any time, but since it takes about five months, I find that timing it so the young are born in spring works best."

"So in summer, after that, you do different things?"

"Of course. I herd the goats across hill and dale to find the best grazing, sleep out under the stars, travel to county fairs to buy and sell and hear the news from other provinces."

He couldn't shake the idea that Loki was disappointed somehow. Underwhelmed.

"But what do you... do? For fun?"

For fun?

"I enjoy nature. Meeting with friends, looking after my girls."

That evidently didn't sound much like fun to Loki.

"You don't have any books even. I used to like to read during the day."

Thor paused with his fork halfway to his lips.

"How?"

"What do you mean, how? Can't you read?"

"Yes, of course, I can. I meant how do you turn the pages with hooves?"

Loki pulled the face he pulled when he was a little embarrassed, mouth turned down a little, slightly pouty.

"I had a servant to do it for me. But I'm sure I could manage if I tried. With my tongue."

Thor was certainly more concerned with things like food and clothes, but if a book would make Loki happy...

"I'll ask," he said. "Maybe my friends can lend us some reading material."

There was a brief pause before Loki thanked him. It seemed to always be so. He wasn't quite used to saying it, if Thor was any judge. Maybe that was because he spent so long as a goat or maybe it was something to do with his rank. He hardly ever forgot completely though.

Thor had never considered that his life might seem boring to someone else. He was always so busy. There was always something, some task he needed to do.

Lonely, certainly. He understood that, felt it keenly. But boring?

Well...

He tried not to worry. Spring would come soon and then the fuss of herding goats over to other areas. That would make things more interesting. All the same, he was a little concerned...

"Is there anything I can do to make things more interesting for you?" he asked. "I know I'm not always the best conversationalist, but... I can try harder."

Loki shook his head, but still seemed a little pensive.

They settled into bed after eating, the goats snoring below. Thor had to admit, it was nice having someone to share his bed even if just to sleep. Warmer, of course, but more than that. It made him feel safer somehow, knowing there was someone else there.

"Why are you letting me stay here?" Loki asked in the dark. "Why are you concerned about taking care of me? You don't even know me."

Thor had been trying to drift off, but the tone cut through his tiredness.

"Well, you're in need. And besides, you're interesting. I like talking to you. I'm... I'm rather lonely a lot of the time. I love the goats, but, well... It's hardly the same."

"Why don't you find a wife?"

Thor chuckled.

"I, er... I doubt I'd please a wife overly."

"Why ever not? You're kind, you're hardworking..."

How to put this delicately?

"I mean... I mean I'm not sure I'd be able to fulfil a woman's desires with the fervency she would deserve."

"Have you a medical complaint of some sort?"

"No. But while I count many women among my friends, I feel more amorous towards men, that's all."

There was a long pause, as if Loki was trying to understand a new idea.

"That is quite an admission," he said after some time.

Thor shrugged.

"It's only fair. I know some of your secrets. You should know one of mine."

He wondered if it was a mistake as Loki went very quiet. Maybe he was worried, unsure about sharing a bed with him suddenly. As if he'd ever make advances unless he was certain they were welcome.

Just as he was beginning to drift off again, Loki whispered a question.

"Have you ever... With another man?"

No sense in lying about it.

"Yes, I have."

"What's it like?"

"Depends on the other person, really."

"I've read about it," Loki said. "But I don't know how accurate the account was."

Thor wasn't sure what he was getting at with that, yawning into the night.

"Will you tell me about it?"

It was the quietest question, but it shocked Thor awake suddenly.

"No," he said instantly before thinking about it a little. "Not tonight. I'm too tired."

"But maybe tomorrow?"

"Maybe."

He wasn't at all sure what to make of such a question. Why did he want to know? Was he just curious? He had been sheltered so long; maybe he wanted to understand the logic and underlying wants that would make someone take the risk of being intimate with a near stranger. That was how it was, for Thor anyway. Sometimes lucky enough to meet with the same man twice, but usually not.

It was risky. He knew it was. But he was a big, burly man, could look after himself if it came to that. It was women he worried more about. In most people's eyes, he was an eligible bachelor and it seemed every year another young woman would come to one of the fairs with a shining ribbon in her hair and a newly sewn dress and make eyes at him. How he hated to disappoint them. They always thought there was something wrong with them. Not true. It was just better to hurt them once than to let some poor woman inflict a lifetime of unhappiness upon herself.

No marriage at all was better than an incomplete one. While he might love someone platonically and go through the motions, as it were, he knew deep down that he could never force himself to feel passion where there was none. And he felt that would be unfair on someone entering into a union with him in good faith.

Normally, he got up before Loki did, but he woke to find himself being looked at curiously.

"Mornin'," he managed, half hoping their conversation would be forgotten.

"Will you tell me about it now?"

"This evening," Thor said.

"Promise?"

"Yes."

He was starting to make his way down the ladder, Loki sitting up urgently.

"No. You have to say 'I promise.'"

Ridiculous really, but Thor heard himself sigh, felt himself shrug.

"Fine. I promise to tell you about it. I just don't understand why you're so interested, that's all."

"Because no one's ever talked to me about that stuff. Not really. And I tried true love's first kiss to break the spell and it didn't work. Maybe I should have tried something more... advanced."

Thor tripped over one of the goats and didn't particularly want to get up to see if he'd really understood that correctly.


	9. Chapter 9

Luckily - or not - he didn't have to ask for clarification as the change came on Loki sooner than usual. He barely managed to make it down the ladder before he started shrinking, already oversized clothes ballooning around him.

Thor was beginning to wonder if it wasn't hastened by stress or other extremes of feeling. Certainly, he seemed to last much longer in human form when he was relaxed than when he was agitated. Always around the same time, but he'd noticed a difference of nearly an hour either way.

He put the clothes back up out of harm's way and patted Loki's head in what he hoped was a friendly and comforting way. It was quite obvious that he was embarrassed sometimes, even though it wasn't his fault.

Breakfast passed mostly in silence and so too did Thor's washing up and setting about reinforcing the door with a fine slice of wood he'd managed to get from the tree. It wasn't that Thor was deliberately not speaking, but he had nothing particularly to say.

And then he heard the yodelling, and Loki did too if the way he suddenly looked alert was any indication.

"It's my friend, Brunnhilde," he said. "Don't worry, she's nice."

She appeared in the doorway, wide smile, her hair spiralling out from beneath her suede hat, eyes going wide when she spotted Loki.

"One of your goats is inside," she said.

"Oddly enough, I had noticed. He likes it better in here. And besides, he's not really mine. I'm just... looking after him. For a while."

He needed to be subtle about this. Although jumping from a new goat to a cursed man would be quite the leap, he didn't want her to think he was behaving strangely. Or certainly not more strangely than usual.

"Does anyone in the town need more firewood?" he asked, putting away the supplies of oats and bread and carrots she'd brought him. "Since it's been so cold, I cut some extra. And I could use some more food. The winter's stripped my bones rather."

She looked him up and down, very visibly not believing that. He always lost a bit of weight in winter, what with the added energy burn of the cold and difficulty moving through snow, but he was hardly starving.

"I can ask," she said. "But I make no promises. I think most people have all they need."

Loki scampered over and nudged Thor in the leg. Had he promised something else?

Oh, yes...

"You have... books, right?" he asked.

"Some."

"Could I borrow them? I think I should read more."

"Of course. Anything in particular?"

"Erm..." Thor said, trying to be subtle as he glanced at Loki. "What kinds do you have?"

"Well, we've got a few old almanacs, lots about leather working of course. Some histories. Romances, but, well, I doubt they'd be your type of thing..."

Loki licked his hand, the strange rough tongue startling him.

"Did he just bite you?"

"No, no. You know goats. He thinks we've got food, that's all. Histories sound good. And I wouldn't mind trying a romance or two. You never know, maybe I'll like them."

Brunhilde frowned at him slightly, like she knew something wasn't right, but couldn't place what.

"I worry about you sometimes, you know," she said. "By yourself up here. You always go a bit funny over winter. Isolation isn't good for you."

Thor scoffed.

"Just because I want to read? I'm fine. Honest. You and Sif visit me, keep me grounded. And it'll be summer soon anyway."

"Mm, and you'll be out prowling the fairs."

Alright, now he was offended.

"I do not prowl! I'm just... open to opportunities, that's all."

"Still. You like company. Have you ever considered getting an assistant or anything?"

"I'm fine by myself! This is the life I chose. Because I like it. I'm free up here. Don't have to worry about anything except the goats and the hut."

"I'm just saying. It's not a criticism."

It kind of felt like one, but he wasn't going to hold a grudge about it. She had his best interests at heart, he was sure. And besides, she didn't know he did have company in the evenings and mornings at present. Even if during the day their conversations were reduced to yes and no questions and occasional head butts.

"I'll think about it," he said. "You never know. I could build an extra room, expand the herd. And you'd get more manure. Speaking of which, not much these past few days, but I gathered what I could..."

Loki followed them round the back to where Thor kept his old buckets, swapping an empty one for half full, nudging at Thor's side after he waved Brunhilde off, a few logs crammed into her pack.

"What?"

A chin jut towards the buckets and then to her retreating form.

"Oh, the dung? She tans leather. It's a vital part of the process. I think it helps soften it or toughen it or something."

Even on his goat face, Loki's distaste was clear.

"I use a little shovel to gather it," Thor protested. "It's nothing to worry about."

Even without words, the implication was clear.

_Can't believe I licked your hand..._


	10. Chapter 10

Thor was still thinking about Brunnhilde's words as he made dinner, a chilly draught managing to sneak down the chimney and making the whole place rather smokier than normal.

A prowler, was that really what she thought? He didn't like that much. Made him sound... predatory. Like he sought out liaisons deliberately rather than through chance.

The distinct sigh came behind him, Loki changing back, the faint sounds of him climbing the ladder and getting dressed.

"Do you think she's right?" he asked, without so much as a hello. "Do you think you need more company?"

"Maybe," Thor admitted. "But I'd have to think about it before getting an assistant. This life isn't right for everyone. I wouldn't want to be left struggling if someone decided they couldn't cope with it."

"Am I helping you? Being here?"

"Oh, of course! I've had more discussion this week than I've had in months."

The chair scraped just as he turned round with plates in hand, boiled barley and shredded dried beef with wild garlic, too thick to be called a broth. And he'd carefully made sure that Loki saw him wash his hands thoroughly before beginning its preparation.

"What about the other thing she said," Loki asked quietly. "About the fairs?"

Thor huffed, stabbing at his meal.

"Well, for a start, I certainly do not prowl. I just... I know the signs when I see them. Signs of interest."

"What signs?"

"Well... Well, there are certain looks. Glances. Subtle, of course, but you can get a feel for them. Spot the difference between an admiring glance and a curious one and where they intersect. And once I'm fairly sure and if I'm interested, I will approach and ensure I have not misread the signals."

Loki was listening with rapt attention, his eyes sharp and darting.

"That's it? That's all it takes for you to fall in love with someone?"

It was such a strange question that Thor was laughing before he realised.

"Love?" he spluttered. "I wouldn't know much about that, I'm afraid."

And now Loki was confused.

"But... But you said you'd made love before."

"Oh, that's... I mean, that's just sex. It's just desire. There's never been any feelings there, other than maybe friendship."

Evidently Loki thought this could not possibly be true.

"Was there kissing?"

"Yes, of course."

"Well, that just proves it. You can't kiss someone you don't love. It's against the rules."

He really was sheltered, wasn't he?

"It's just an action," Thor said. "It can mean a lot or it can mean nothing. Sex is just the same. I hear it's wonderful with feelings involved, but they're not mandatory."

Loki stared off into the distance, thoughtful.

"I wonder if that's why it didn't work," he said. "True love's first kiss. They kept asking me if I loved Angrboda and I thought kissing her would cure me and so I said yes. And I believed it, but now I wonder if maybe... maybe not."

"Did she love you?" Thor asked, assuming it would have to be mutual.

"They said she did. We didn't actually talk very much. I was a goat a lot of the time for one thing."

Hmm. Very telling. An eligible young lady pushed in the prince's way for the express purpose of breaking the curse. As if you could manufacture love so easily.

"I've never been in love," Thor confessed, hoping to take Loki's mind off it. "So if you were looking for advice on that front, I'll be of no help I'm afraid."

If he wasn't mistaken, Loki's eyes gleamed a little bit.

"Then tell me about desire instead," he said. "So I don't confuse them."

That hadn't been quite what he had in mind...

"Well, it's... It's complicated. And differs from person to person."

"Then just tell me one of your stories. Like of your first time maybe. You did promise, after all."

Yes. He did, didn't he?

His first time... That was some time ago now.

"It was my first fair outside of the town," he said, trying to think back on it. "My first time travelling alone. I was excited. I'd put my herd into rented barn space for the night and took myself to get a bite to eat before thinking about finding somewhere to sleep. Ended up in the pub. Noticed a man's eyes on me."

"What kind of man?"

It was strange to even think back so far.

"Built much like myself, though darker complexioned. Deep, rich brown eyes. A fine beard. I remember meeting his gaze for just a fraction too long, looking away blushing, certain I had caused offence. But after I finished eating, he brought me a fresh ale, asked if I would play a hand of cards with him. He was friendly, but I could feel something else, some spark of mutual want."

He skipped out how clumsy and worried he'd been, how shocked at the idea that his desires might be returned.

"We played several games. And he asked if we might make a wager. Make it more interesting. I told him I had no money, for truthfully I did not. And he chuckled and leant across the table a little to murmur that if I lost I would merely owe him a kiss."

Loki's eyes had gone rather wide.

"And if you won?"

Thor swallowed a mouthful of dinner, trying not to blush at the memory.

"If I won, I could choose coin or... something else."

"And?"

"I won. Though I think he let me win."

"And?!"

Another forkful. It would go cold if he wasn't careful.

"And I chose something other than money."


	11. Chapter 11

This was not really a story to tell over dinner. Thor would have preferred beer to milk for one thing. But Loki was so keen to hear it, lips parted and leaning forward to listen. He couldn't deny him the tale now.

"He took me back to his lodgings. The doorman didn't bat an eye, thought we were just friends splitting the price. I was so nervous. Excited, but nervous. I had never done something like it before. But I wanted to. So badly."

"Weren't you scared? Being alone like that with a stranger?"

"I should have been, but I wasn't. There was something about him. A kindness. And I'm fairly strong. I thought I could look after myself if it came to that."

Loki glanced at his arms and seemed to decide the argument held water.

"I didn't have to worry, in fact," Thor said. "He was very tender with me. I don't know if he knew it was my first experience or if that was his preferred way, but it was gentle and careful. Caresses and kisses."

He wasn't entirely sure how comfortable he was going into the details. That kind of thing was rather private. But he couldn't stop his memories drifting back, to being touched and held. To sighs and gasps, grasping hands, the feeling of a warm body between his legs...

Yes, he might not know much about love, but he knew what it was to feel wanted, even just for a night.

"You're smiling just thinking of him," Loki said. "Are you sure you didn't love him?"

"Quite sure. I'm smiling because it is a pleasant memory, that's all."

"Are they not all pleasant?"

"Well... Sometimes things don't work quite so well. Or people are looking for different things."

It wasn't that he disliked the hard, quick fuck as a technique or an experience; just sometimes he liked to pretend he had something he feared his life could never have, certainly not long-term. Intimacy. Something like romance.

"I don't believe I ever knew the man's name, nor he mine."

Loki shifted slightly uncomfortably.

"I'm not sure I'd like to be like that with someone I didn't know," he said.

"Well, you're not looking for that kind of thing," Thor said shrugging. "True love's kiss, right? What else have you tried to lift the curse?"

A long look, maybe wondering whether to trust him.

"We did a lot of things down the years. Leeches, exposure to pressure, water therapy, specific rituals at specific times of the lunar year. It would have been helpful to ask the witch, but she vanished."

"Why did she curse you? What did your parents do to offend her?"

Loki looked away, shoulders hunched. Curling in on himself.

"I don't know. Turns out I don't know a lot of things. They've been misleading me a long while."

He gloomily finished his food, wiping up the remaining sauce with a slice of bread.

"You're a very intelligent man," Thor said. "I'm sure you know a lot more than me for one thing."

"That's not what I meant. I'm a man of thirty and I did not know that love and sex could be separate. I thought that love was... I'm not even sure what I thought. They told me I had to stay in the palace for my own safety, but told everyone else I had been cursed and abducted... They're ashamed of me. Of what I am. And they lied to me."

Unthinkingly, Thor reached across the table and took Loki's hand, squeezing it lightly.

"Then they're fools."

"Hey! They're still my parents. I'm sure they thought they were doing the right thing."

He wasn't snatching his hand back though. He seemed almost grateful for it. And that made Thor want to cultivate something, strengthen their friendship.

"I know I'm an uncultured goatherd, but believe me, you are wonderful just as you are. Smart enough to find ways to communicate even without words, and great company. I'm glad that out of all the huts you could have found, you came to mine."

"I am too. I thought you'd send me back to the palace as soon as you knew who I was."

"If you wanted to leave such luxury, you must have had a reason. But that is your business, not mine."

Loki looked at him piercingly, a long, hard stare, moving his hand back and swallowing hard.

"They... They suggested something I couldn't go through with."

"You don't have to tell me."

"No, I want to. They said that I needed to spend the night with a new bride. That I had to marry Angrboda. And though she is dear to me, the idea of marrying her... I don't know. I couldn't bear it somehow. And so I ran."

Ah. Forced marriage. Yes, that was quite reason enough to run and hide.

"You don't love her."

"I thought I did. She's kind. She's... sweet, I suppose. But I don't want to be with her forever. And I doubt she wants it either. No one asked us what we wanted."

"Why didn't you explain to your parents?"

"I did try! But they didn't listen. And so they left me no choice. I ran away in the middle of the night, just focussed on getting as far away as I could."

It seemed a little overdramatic, but maybe that was the life of royalty. Decrees and proclamations and no choices in any matter. Marriages for alliances, curses, assassinations probably. He was well out of it.

"Well," Thor said, trying to be comforting. "At least you don't have to worry about all that anymore."

He should really have known that saying such a thing was a bad idea. His mother had always said that there was no curse more powerful than "Things could be worse."

Because, alas, they usually could.


	12. Chapter 12

It was Sif who unknowingly broke the news. Brunnhilde was busy with a new batch of hides and so she brought a few books and requests for well-priced logs. Her practised yodels echoed up the mountain, announcing her presence and letting Thor have tea freshly made and poured just as she arrived.

"You won't believe what appeared in the town today," she said, letting her hair cascade in a coil out of her hat.

"What?"

"News about your little friend. You're rich, Thor. Look."

From the depths of an inside pocket, she produced a tightly folded piece of paper.

"They've popped up like spring blossom," she said, "All the notice boards have them. Just in case we miss the first one, I suppose."

Thor took it from her, frowning as he read it.

_Their royal highnesses the King and Queen of Erfundorf seek the help of their kind neighbours in finding their missing prize goat. The creature was a gift to the Queen to ease her mourning for her missing son, Prince Loki, and is very dear to her. Handsome reward offered for its safe return. The creature is large, black, has horns and is unused to human company beyond the royal family. May be easily spooked._

There was even a woodcut of Loki's goat form beneath the words.

He tried to cover how hard his heart had thumped in his chest.

"Nah," he said. "It's a different goat."

She gave him a bemused look.

"You sound very sure," she said.

"I am. I know goats. Look at the curve of the horns and the way the beard is. Totally different."

Loki had evidently been listening and trotted over, nudging at Thor's knee. Trying to be subtle, Thor let his hand drop to the side, hopefully leaving the poster in a good position for reading.

"Could be worth a try anyway," Sif said. "A handsome reward could be anything. Money. Titles. Just imagine - Sir Thor. Maybe they'll put you in charge of taking care of it."

There was a snort and Loki ate the poster, snuffling loudly. His views were clear enough.

"It'd just be a long trip for nothing," he said. "Besides, what about the girls? It's not like I could drive them all the way to Erfundorf, especially not when they're going to be birthing soon."

He could tell from her narrowed eyes that she thought there was something going on here. He wasn't the best at lying. She'd known him far too long to trust this.

"You don't want to let it go," she said. "Is it valuable or something? I'm sure they wouldn't mind giving you stud rights if you returned it..."

Loki choked slightly, coughing a scrap of paper onto the floor while Thor pet him gently.

"They can't have the goat," he said. "And please don't tell anyone about him. It'll only attract thieves."

She folded her arms, leaning back in her chair.

"Just tell me what's so special about the goat and I'll say no more about it."

"Nothing! He's just the wrong goat, that's all. Besides, if they care so much, they can come look at him themselves."

Loki bleated loudly, alarmed.

"But they shouldn't bother," Thor said insistently. "Because he's the wrong goat."

She wasn't believing a word of this. It was obvious. But it wasn't like he could tell her the truth...

"Trust me," he said. "It'll be closer to home than here. Goats don't just cross counties for no reason, especially not in winter. They're herd animals after all. It'll probably go home by itself."

"And if they do come here and see him?"

"Then the Queen will realise that he's the wrong goat."

But she wouldn't. She'd know. He knew it. Loki knew it. And he'd be back in the palace and married and still spend half his time as a goat and be hidden again.

"Anyway, how's Brunnhilde?"

It was an obvious ploy to distract her, and she was suspicious, but then again, she valued the chance to talk freely about her relationship.

"I'm trying to convince her that we could make ladies' gloves. The men's ones are perfectly serviceable, but if they were smaller and more elegant, we could reach a whole new market. And I'm sure there must be dyeing options we're not thinking of. Imagine - beautiful lilac gloves... They'd suit her so well."

Thor politely nodded along like his head wasn't swirling with worries.

He felt a strong loyalty to Loki, for all they hadn't known one another long. Everyone else in his life - his parents, even - had lied to him, had tried to push him into things he didn't want. As his friend, he was going to listen to what he wanted. Listen and help him.

Of course, in an ideal world, they'd manage to break the curse somehow. But how? It seemed like everything possible had already been tried.

Still, as he bid Sif a friendly goodbye, he felt the weight of the risk, along with the distinct feeling of a worried goat at his side.

He crouched so he could look into Loki's eyes, all strange horizontal pupils and fear.

"I'll protect you as best I can," he promised. "But I fear we might need a very good plan."

It was very strange indeed to see a goat nod.


	13. Chapter 13

Waiting was the worst thing. Being unable to talk with Loki properly, having to hold back his rushing thoughts while the hours of the day ticked by so slowly.

Thor threw himself into work, cleaning every scrap of the cabin, sweeping the floor, scrubbing the table, taking out the bedding to shake and freshen up. He got out one of the books for Loki, hoping to distract him too, the image of a goat holding open a book with one hoof and carefully turning pages with his nose certainly a novel one.

It seemed to take forever for Loki to change, the stress evidently taking its toll on him, finally flopping onto the floor as a human long after Thor had given up on not overcooking dinner.

He lay there, sighing, stretching and then going limp again.

"What are we going to do?" he asked.

"I'm not sure," Thor said, honestly. "But with a bit of luck, we shall have some time to consider the matter. Black goats from all over the land will be being presented after all. That ought to buy at least a little reprieve. And besides, they have no reason to think you are here, do they? That you came in this direction?"

"I don't think so. I chose it at random."

"Right. Then we have nothing to worry about," he lied. "No one ever comes up here. You'll be quite safe."

He'd gone to the trunk and fetched Loki's usual clothes, averting his eyes as usual while he got dressed and pretending he couldn't hear any worried little sobs.

"What if they stop asking nicely?" Loki said. "What if they demand all black goats be handed over?"

That was a risk, he had to admit.

"We'll deal with that if we need to."

"They'll arrest you, you know. They'll know that you know what I am. They won't let you stay out here."

"Good, because if they think they're taking you anywhere you don't want to be, they'll have to get through me first."

Loki's hands on his shoulders, turning him around curiously.

"Why? Why would you do that? It's stupid."

"Because you're my friend. And you came here needing help."

The upturned chin, the stubborn look that always clung to him for a few minutes after the change.

"No. I forbid you to do that. If they come, you should just let me go. Claim ignorance."

Thor scoffed.

"You forbid it, huh? Tough. Someone has to stand up for you. Someone has to tell them that this is wrong."

"They're royalty, Thor! They could have you flogged. Or executed. Imprisonment is probably the least unpleasant outcome."

"Then I'll be imprisoned. Better that than know I just stood by while they trampled over your wishes because of a curse that wasn't even your fault."

He put down the plates and cups slightly more firmly than usual, regretting it instantly when he saw Loki's expression, the little uncertain frown. Had that been too harsh?

"It..." Loki said. "It was my fault."

"What was?"

"The curse. It was my fault."

Thor paused for a moment, confused, before sitting down, trying to understand.

"But I thought... I thought your parents offended a witch..."

"No. I offended her."

"How? You were a child."

Loki sighed heavily and flopped into his chair, leaning his elbows on the table.

"She arrived uninvited to my party and offered me a gift. I accepted, because of course I did. It was my birthday, you have to accept all gifts however humble."

"What was it? The gift?"

"It's a tradition. An intangible gift. You know... Wisdom or compassion or courage. It's not meant to be literal. You're supposed to bow graciously, accept the gift and then when you're king everyone will say 'Ah, yes, our wise king, gifted with wisdom by a wise woman,' and everyone's happy. It's stupid."

"What did she offer you?"

Loki sighed again, eyes down.

"The gift of tenacity. Tenacity! I ask you. My father was King Laufey the Brave and here I was, lumbered with Loki the Tenacious. It was embarrassing! And so I thanked her but said I'd be fine, unless she had anything better."

Thor had been eating, hungry after his exertions of the day, but he could feel his heart sinking, swallowing hard.

"How was I supposed to know she had actual magic powers?" Loki protested. "I thought it was just a stupid ritual. How was I supposed to know that the ceremony was mandatory and binding? No one told me!"

Holding in a sigh, and figuring that any information would help and be a potential clue as to how to lift the curse, Thor rubbed at his eyes.

"Right. And what did she say?"

"She said that perhaps I didn't have the vocabulary to understand and might prefer a synonym and then... Then gave me the gift of stubbornness instead. Cackled a bit and then left. I changed for the first time a few hours later. A goat, the most stubborn of creatures."

"And the witch?"

A shake of his head.

"Was never found. She just vanished."

Or so his parents had told him. Thor wasn't sure if he trusted their word.

"For all I know, there is no way to lift the curse," Loki said miserably. "And I'm going to be stuck like this forever."

"No," Thor said, tightening his jaw. "We'll figure it out. We just need a plan."

"Such as?"

Thor tapped his spoon against the table.

"We hide for winter," he said. "And then we go to the fairs and try to track the witch down."

Loki frowned lightly.

"For all I know, she's long dead," he said. "It was a long time ago after all."

"Have you got a better idea?" Thor asked. "We break the curse and then you can return home in triumph, the long-lost prince ready to come into his birthright. And you won't have to get married."

"And if we can't find her?"

Thor shrugged.

"Then we'll find a different witch. Ask for advice. This isn't a doctor's matter at all, it's a witch's one. They'll know what to do."

Loki didn't seem completely convinced, but he smiled all the same. Hopeful.

It was good to have hope.


	14. Chapter 14

News came in drips and drabs as Sif and Brunnhilde became more and more confused at his continued insistence that he would not be chancing taking the black goat to be seen by the royal family.

"They've rejected dozens so far, I've heard," Sif said over tea, a more frequent visitor as the thaw set in properly.

"All the more reason not to bother with a wasted trip."

"He came out of nowhere and acts differently to the others," Brunnhilde said, helping him darn a few socks. "He could be a royal goat, used to being treated specially."

"He's not their goat."

He knew they were teasing him after a while. Laughing at how stubborn he was. Insinuating that he'd finally found a life companion.

Still, the days were getting longer and warmer, new grass sprouting, little wildflowers bravely appearing and showing their bright faces to the world.

Loki loved plants, it turned out. Maybe it was part of being so cooped up for so long, but he began to go out and look for new flowers, coming back to nudge at Thor and take him to something he wanted to know the name of. 

"It's a snowdrop. It's an edelweiss. It's a pansy. I don't actually know what that one is. That's just a dandelion. We can make wine out of those in summer if you want."

It was charming and sweet, but it left him with more questions about Loki's time under lock and key.

"Did you not have gardens? I imagined the palace would have wonderful grounds. Surely they didn't keep you indoors all the time."

"I would take walks in the walled garden sometimes with my mother, but we didn't have plants like I've seen here. We had roses and box hedges and azaleas. Everything perfectly trimmed and hemmed in. I'd never seen a dandelion before now."

"I think it's technically a weed."

"Well, when I go home, I shall order them to be left alone. I like them. They're cheerful."

Although he wanted Loki to be happy and free of his curse, Thor couldn't help but feel a little twinge of regret every time he spoke about leaving. He chastised himself for it. That was just how things were meant to be. Loki would one day be king of Erfundorf and he would finish helping him with his quest and then come back to the hut and look after the goats.

It was just how things were. No sense in troubling himself over things that could not be changed.

"I've been thinking," Loki said one evening, about a week before Thor thought they ought to set out. "When we're at the fairs..."

"Mm?"

"Maybe I could come with you in the evenings. Spend some time among the common people."

Thor smiled.

"Well, as a bit of advice, you probably shouldn't call them the common people when you meet them."

"Sorry. Still, I think I would enjoy it. But these clothes... I don't want to sound ungrateful, but I feel I would rather stand out dressed like this. Could we... take them in a little? Nothing fancy, just so I'm not too obviously wearing your things."

He had a point. Though Thor couldn't afford proper tailoring, he was at least able to work a needle and thread well enough to make things fit, more or less. His new... assistant being dressed in clearly secondhand clothes that hadn't had even attempts at alterations would reflect very badly on him indeed.

"Of course. Here, let's see..."

They'd need quite a bit of stitching by the looks of things, Thor pinching in the back. Not a difficult job though, hopefully. And the ties on his trousers were fine, but maybe with a little adjustment to the waistline...

Was it warm in here suddenly? It felt warm in here.

Oh...

Oh, no.

Well, this was ridiculous. He saw Loki undressed all the time, every day. Why was pulling his clothes taut suddenly making his brain turn to mush?

No, no, no. This was stupid and was not happening. Loki was his friend and he was going to help him break his curse and that was all. He wasn't going to ruin it by letting himself get carried away.

"Shouldn't be hard," he said, letting the fabric fall back into comforting and concealing folds.

Loki smiled at him and his heart did a strange flop that he tried to ignore as best he could.

"You seem very sure that we'll be able to find some witches to help us," Loki said thoughtfully. "Have you met some before? I thought they were just stories."

"Sometimes stories are more than just that. Sometimes they've a little bit of truth in them. My mother was not a witch herself, but she was a wise woman, as they say. A midwife and healer. So I'm not completely unfamiliar with their traditions."

"Is that why you were so calm seeing me?"

Thor shrugged. He didn't feel he was particularly good at articulating what ifs or speculations. There were things that were and things that might be and he knew which he was more comfortable with.

"I don't tend to question the evidence of my own eyes," he said. "The world is full of strange things, that's what I know."

"And yet it seems the most ordinary thing in the world to me. Just a fact of life. And the life you lead is strange in my eyes."

"Maybe everything is normal to someone, no matter how bizarre."

"Or harmful."

Yes, realising you were effectively being held hostage by your parents would be quite a thing to come to terms with.

Thor made himself smile and chat about the first county fair of the season, only a couple of weeks away now, hoping to take his mind off it.

"How are you going to deal with the attention I'll bring?" Loki asked after a while. "When I'm a goat, I mean. It will be like Sif and Brunnhilde's chiding multiplied."

Ah, yes. There was a distinct safety issue here after all.

"I have an an idea about that," Thor said. "Though I'm afraid you might find it undignified."

The guarded expression told him everything he needed to know. Better just to get it out and over with.

"I can't let you out of my sight, but no one will trust a goat wandering around of its own will, particularly not a billy with all those females in one place. So I fear I'll have to keep you on a leash. Just for the look of the thing."

Loki's eyebrows had gone up and showed no sign of dropping.

"You intend to lead me around like a dog?"

"Not at all!" Thor said, holding his hands up, placating. "It would just be for appearance's sake. And then when it's time for you to change, just give me a little nudge and we'll go and hide somewhere while you get dressed. I can't think of any other way to be sure of your safety."

"I can look after myself. If anyone comes near me, I'll just kick them."

Thor hesitated for a moment.

"No offence, but I managed to overpower you by myself. A group would be difficult to fend off."

"You're forgetting I was being careful. I didn't want to hurt you."

"And I don't want you to get hurt either."

Loki's expression softened just slightly at that.

"I'll think about it."

Going to bed was a special torture for Thor and his new-found desires, but he was able to mostly put it out of his mind. Until Loki unconsciously cuddled into him in his sleep. Then his heart was pounding, his mouth dry, wanting nothing more than to roll over and hold him in turn.

But he wouldn't. It wasn't appropriate.

Instead, he deliberately shut his eyes, and thought about turnips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: Well, I suppose I'd better tag the slow burn...


	15. Chapter 15

"Why are you taking in your clothes?" Brunnhilde asked, head popping round the door. "They'll not fit you."

"I'm thinking of selling these ones," Thor lied, mumbling around a pin held in his mouth. "I thought they'd be more likely to sell if they fit someone a little smaller."

"Are you planning to wash them first?"

Loki's head shot up from where he was hiding from a rain shower in a corner of the hut, practically wagging his tail.

"I'm nearly done if you could take them down to the washerwoman."

She gave him a pointed look.

"And how do you intend to pay her for this?"

"Free milk."

"You're not going to have enough money for food once you've paid me for my work at this rate."

Ah, yes. A little thing he'd asked her to make while Loki was off looking at the newly sprouting blossoms. Mainly because he wanted to delay the inevitable fight.

"Is it ready?"

"Well, you're lucky that I had a little scrap left over from a pair of boots I made for Mr Reece. I still don't understand why it couldn't be goat. You know it's cheaper."

"I am not making him wear a collar made from goat leather! That would be like wearing a coat made of human skin."

"He's a goat, Thor. He won't know."

 _"I'll_ know."

She laughed at him as she fished it out of her bag, a neat little black band, fully adjustable with interlocking straps that would take a lot of undoing unless you knew what you were doing. He wanted a further deterrent to anyone who thought about trying to steal Loki. A clear sign of ownership.

Which, unfortunately, was exactly how Loki interpreted it too, distinctly griping at him in a grumpy manner all afternoon.

He came back to himself with a huffy sigh, wrapping himself in the spare blanket since Brunnhilde had taken his clothes away for washing.

"I am not wearing a collar of all things," he snapped. "I refuse."

"It's just to make it look like someone would definitely be furious if you went missing. And it will make the leash more comfortable."

"I haven't decided if I'm wearing that yet either."

Thor groaned.

"It's embarrassing!" Loki said loudly. "I ran away from being in a cage and now you want to truss me up like this? Like an animal?"

"To everyone else, it must appear that you are an animal. I'm sorry, but that's just how it is."

"It will hurt when I change. You'll choke me."

"Your neck is much bigger when you're a goat. It doesn't go small enough to hurt you."

"Prove it. You put it on."

This was ridiculous, but if it was the only way to make him stop being so silly...

Thor picked up the collar where it was resting on the table and looped it around his neck, pulling it as tight as it would go, demonstrating how there were still inches of slack left.

"See?" he said. "It won't hurt, promise."

He glanced up and met Loki's gaze, his lips slightly parted and his cheeks pink. He took a little half-step forward and then stopped, eyes wide.

"Fine," he said, sounding a little shocked. "But if I have to wear it during the day, you need to wear it at night."

Thor scoffed.

"Yes, I'm sure that will help with how conspicuous we are."

"Not in public. Just... In whatever lodgings we end up in."

What a strange request. Still, if it kept him happy, Thor would do it. Even if it was ridiculous.

The first pair of kids were born a little earlier than he expected, three days before they were planning to leave. It was clear that the goat was due, belly heavy, lethargic. She gave birth one morning without much ceremony, an old hand at this, licking her tiny bleating infants until their hair stuck up wildly around their heads.

Loki was fascinated by them, sniffing them, watching them take their first trembling steps and then begin leaping about the place.

"What will happen to them?" he asked at dinner. "The kids?"

Why did Thor feel like he was about to explain the facts of life to a child? Oh, no...

"Well, I tend to keep the herd at around ten females. The males will definitely be sold. With the girls, it depends, really. You need to mix the blood up to keep them healthy so I might keep a few of them and let some of the older ones go. Need to keep track of who their sires are too, of course."

Surely that had been what Loki expected. He was just telling the truth. He was a grown man, he could handle the truth of it.

"I'm afraid that's just how it is," Thor said, shrugging in the face of his worried little frown. "I look after them, but I need to live. I can't keep them all forever."

"I know," Loki said quietly. "And you're right. I just hope they'll be happy with whoever buys them, that's all."

That was always Thor's hope too. Especially when he knew they were going to be slaughtered. He hoped it would be quick.

Still... People had to eat. He gave the goats as good a life as he could.

"I also hope Brunnhilde brings my clothes back soon," Loki said, clearly making an effort to sound brighter. "I feel indecent like this."

Thor smiled and bit his tongue around saying that he thought it suited him. The draping fabric, the little peeks of skin he got from time to time.

It wouldn't be appropriate to say.


	16. Chapter 16

There were five kids by the time Thor began packing things up, ready for the walk to the next county to attend the fairs and begin their search for magical help.

Which was not something he had expected to be thinking about this time last year.

Tankard for water, extra blanket, spare shoes, concealed money pockets, space for Loki's clothes...

Assuming, of course, that Brunnhilde brought them back in time.

"Look, if she doesn't bring them in the morning, we'll just have to swing by her shop on our way and get them," Thor said, slightly exasperated by Loki's sighing.

"It's a long way to go just for that. We'll lose time that we could be making progress."

The one thing Thor wasn't expecting was for Brunnhilde to show up in the late evening, knocking on his door as the sun was setting without so much as a yodel to warn them.

His eyes locked with Loki's across the table, getting up as she called his name, opening the door a tiny crack.

"I'm so sorry about this," she said, taking a step forward almost into him. "I gave it to the laundresses as soon as I got home but then there was some kind of emergency laundry for suspected bed bugs with the Turners - remember them? They have eight girls now, would you believe? So anyway, yours went right to the bottom of the pile and I had to go and have words with... Are you going to let me in or not?"

"I, er... I don't want the new kids escaping," Thor tried. "They're a bit feisty."

She rolled her eyes.

"Thor, I've been helping you catch runaway goats for years. Just block them with your foot. I brought my own dinner if that's what you're worried about."

"It's not that, it's..."

There was a faint clatter as Loki leapt across the room and managed to dislodge the ladder rather than climb it, making it bang hard against the platform.

Brunnhilde looked at him, guilt evidently written all over his face.

"Have you got someone in there?" she hissed. "You absolute dog. How on earth did you manage that? No one comes up here."

"I... No."

She ducked under his arm, using her diminutive height to her advantage, in before he could stop her.

"He's a friend!" Thor tried desperately.

Loki hadn't made it up the ladder but drew himself up to his full height, perhaps trying to look as regal as possible while wearing a blanket.

Brunnhilde stared at him for a while, then glanced at Thor and back again.

"What's going on?" she asked. "And don't lie."

There was an intensely guilty pause before Loki cleared his throat.

"I am merely a traveller passing through. Mr Thor was kind enough to offer me shelter for the night."

"And you're naked because..."

Um...

"The goats ate my clothes?" Loki tried.

Brunnhilde laughed mockingly, pulling the newly washed garments out of her pack.

"No. I think these are for you," she said. "They look like they'd fit. Almost like someone measured them."

Thor tried his best to look innocent while his brain desperately scrambled for an explanation. Something vaguely plausible, preferably.

Oddly enough, he wasn't having much luck on that front.

"How long has this been going on?"

"Nothing's going on," Thor insisted. "Loki has merely been staying with me for a little while, that's all. And we're going to go to the fairs together on his way home."

She didn't look angry or disappointed. Just pitying that he could possibly be trying to worm his way out of this.

But then she frowned and looked around, like she was suddenly realising something else was out of place.

"Where's the black goat?" she asked.

Thor's immediate instinct was to deny all knowledge of any black goat, but somehow he felt that wouldn't convince her.

"Ran away," he said.

She scoffed.

"Thor, it practically followed you around like you were its mother and you're trying to tell me it ran away? No, no... Strange goat, strange man. Royal goat... Royal name... No clothes of one's own..."

Forcing a laugh, Thor took the bundle from her and gave it to Loki in the hopes that he could at least regain a little dignity if he was dressed.

"What, you think he's some kind of man-goat who is also a prince being hunted by his own parents? That's ridiculous."

He steered her over to the corner to give Loki a bit of privacy to change.

"You can't tell anyone," he hissed. "I'm serious. Not even Sif."

"I can't believe you kept this from me. This is why you've been getting through more food than normal. And the books. Because you've met your charming prince, literally."

"He's _not_ my... Look, he's hiding from an arranged marriage and we're going to go and find a witch to help us break his curse so he can go home. He was never really missing. They hid him away. It's awful and he needs my help."

"Find a witch?" she said incredulously. "You don't just find witches. What are you going to do, ask around?"

"My mother..."

"Was a wise woman. It's not the same thing."

"How are you an expert all of a sudden?"

"Because I've been places! I've met people!"

"You've met witches?" Loki asked, startling them both.

Admittedly a one-room cottage was not the best location to have a hushed conversation. But at least Loki looked a bit happier, or a bit less stressed, taking his usual seat at the table and steepling his fingers.

"I've... Once, yes."

Loki gestured to the other chair.

"Any information could help."

Thor took a moment to readjust, tried not to worry about where his life was now, and decided to make some tea.

It felt like it might help.


	17. Chapter 17

Thor upended his empty turnip barrel to use as a temporary chair as Brunnhilde spoke, running her fingers through her hair.

"I didn't believe he was a witch at first, obviously," she said. "I mean, I didn't believe magic and curses were real. I just thought they were stories for children. There were rumours, of course. They said a witch had been at your birthday celebration, but I assumed it was exaggeration. Villagers in the provinces who still believed in the old ways."

It was perhaps a little insulting to infer that they were surrounded by ignorant bumpkins, but then again, she was the most well-traveled person Thor knew. It stood to reason that maybe she'd seen the kind of thing that he could only speculate about.

"On my travels, I came to a strange village. The people there were in thrall to a strange man. And they said he was a witch."

"Isn't a male witch called a warlock?" Loki asked.

"They called him a witch. And I scoffed and laughed and assumed he was just a powerful man who'd frightened them into submission. And then I met him."

There was something about the way she spoke, a strange kind of fear in her voice that Thor had never heard before, reaching for her cup with a faint tremble in her hand.

"I've never actually spoken about this to anyone except Sif," she said, slightly embarrassed. "It was... not a good time."

"What happened?" Thor asked.

"He knew things about me. Things he couldn't have known. And I realised why they were all so scared. He learned secrets and used them as weapons."

"That's not magic," Loki said. "That's just politics."

Brunnhilde shot him a dark look.

"I saw him kill a man with nothing but a touch," she whispered. "A finger to his forehead and he collapsed to the ground screaming, burned from the inside out. Everything in the town was operated for his benefit and no one else's. The people had just enough food to survive while he and his chosen ones ate banquets. He wore gold silk robes - they wore flax and itchy wool shirts that were barely more than rags. He slept on a feather bed, often with several companions - they were lucky to have straw."

"Why were you there in the first place?" Thor asked.

"I stumbled upon it. And I feared I might never be allowed to leave again. It seemed cut off somehow, hidden in a valley that had only steep cliffs. No way to climb them. I was there three months before I managed to get out. I only wish I'd been able to take some of the others with me."

"How? How did you escape?"

"Promised him my first born. I think he liked the brazenness of making such an offer when he knew I have neither the desire nor the risk of falling pregnant. I amused him and on a whim he parted the rocks and let me leave. But my point is you shouldn't go looking for witches. They're bad news."

Another time, he'd have thought she was joking. Such an outlandish tale couldn't possibly be true. But she seemed deadly serious and a degree of fear began to enter Thor's heart.

"What do you propose we do, then?" Loki asked. "I've tried everything. Or had everything tried on me. There are surely good witches out there, or at least those who know about curses and how to break them."

"You need to be careful," she said, running the tip of a finger along the woodgrain of Thor's table. "People are looking for black goats for a start. Talk to the wrong person and, well..."

The implication was clear. It had all seemed so simple this morning. Suddenly Thor was worried. Suddenly he was wondering if Loki should come with him at all or if he should go alone and try to find some answers that way.

No. He wanted him close. So he could watch over him properly. Keep him safe.

"We shall be cautious," he said. "Talk only to people we're sure are trustworthy."

"That's my point, though," she said. "You can never be sure."

Thor's eyes fell on Loki, his look of misery and uncertainty.

"Well, we have to try anyway," he said decisively. "We can't do nothing. We can't just wait for the palace guards to come knocking."

"I'd rather take the risk and have a chance," Loki said. "I ran to escape and I have no intention of getting back in the cage without a fight."

Brunnhilde still seemed a little wary, but clearly knew she wasn't going to chance their minds.

"Maybe Sif and I can help," she said. "Rumours are powerful things. We can try to send them in the wrong direction. I won't tell her why, but... We'll try to buy you some extra time. And you should send notes so we know you're safe because otherwise I'll be worried sick about you."

Sometimes Thor really was struck by how lucky he was to have such good friends, reaching out to take her hand and squeeze it.

"We'll be careful," he said. "And if we meet a bad witch, I know what to do."

"What?"

"I'll offer them my first born."

It was good to see Loki laugh a little, even if he did still seem a bit sad and afraid.


	18. Chapter 18

It was much too late for Brunnhilde to walk home, so Thor and Loki gave her the bed, settling themselves among the goats, the new kids curiously nibbling at them.

"This is how we first met," Loki whispered. "I was so cold and you were so warm."

"That's me. Human furnace."

Though he wouldn't ever tell her she did, it was good that Brunnhilde snored. She was definitely asleep. Their hushed conversation wasn't disturbing her.

"I can't believe you're putting yourself in danger for me," Loki said. "You don't have to."

"I'm sure we'll be fine. And I want to help. You're my friend."

A long pause, almost like he'd fallen asleep. And then...

"I don't think I've ever had a friend before."

He'd never wanted to hug Loki more. But maybe just lying next to him was enough.

The change came early, waking him as Loki moaned suddenly, Brunnhilde's worried face appearing over the edge of the platform, mouth falling open. Maybe she hadn't really believed it. Or maybe it was just the shock of actually seeing it.

He tried to lessen the distress Loki might be feeling at being so exposed by acting like everything was perfectly ordinary, folding Loki's clothes and packing them, carefully slipping the collar around his neck. They'd have to set off soon to make good progress.

"Well..." Brunnhilde said as Thor locked up his hut. There wasn't much worth stealing, but he'd rather not have his pots and pans lifted. "Good luck. Can't wait to hear all about your adventures."

In truth, Thor wasn't really looking forward to coming home alone, but he was looking forward to Loki being safe and happy and cured.

The kids gambolled along in front of them, the heavily pregnant goats moving more slowly, the bright spring sunshine and rich mountain air filling Thor with hope in spite of his concerns. And maybe Loki was feeling the same way, nosing at clover and daisies.

They had to stop briefly while one of the goats gave birth, Thor helping her through it while Loki patrolled the rest of the herd, keeping them close.

The kid had just stood on shaky legs when Loki barrelled over a little rise towards him, almost like he was trying to hide. And Thor soon saw why when two men appeared, nodding to him.

"That goat yours?" one asked.

"Raised him from a kid," Thor said, trying not to seem too guarded.

"He's not the one they've been looking for then?"

"Nah. Had him years. He fathered this lot."

They glanced at his other goats and the new kid, taking its first feed.

"Planning on selling him?"

"No. Grown attached."

They barked goodbyes and carried on their way, Thor watching with some suspicion.

"It's alright," he said when Loki nudged his leg nervously. "They just think you're virile and worth buying."

Loki didn't seem overly impressed with that, but kept close to him as he found a stream to drink from and rinse his hands. Loki splashed a little, perhaps asking if he was planning to take a bath.

"I'll bathe before we reach the town," Thor said. "I promise. There's a deeper pool I know, more secluded. We'll sleep out here tonight and head into our first stop tomorrow."

That seemed to pass muster, nothing else upsetting their journey. It felt good to walk, really stretching his legs for the first time in months.

Normally around this time, he started to think of the approaching evenings, once his business was done, the men he might meet for just a night. None of that this year, of course. He had company.

The same thought had clearly also occurred to Loki though, once he'd turned back and they sat under the blanket eating a dinner of bread and dried meat.

"Will people make... assumptions about us sharing a room?" he asked.

Thor shrugged.

"They might, but it's fairly common for two men to lodge together. It's cheaper for one thing."

Loki nodded vaguely.

"I don't care if they do," he said. "I just want to be prepared."

It was a different experience, bedding down outside with someone else. Companionable. And warmer, of course. And Loki was kindly not making him wear the collar just yet.

"What if it rains?" Loki asked.

"If it rains then I don't have to bathe tomorrow."

His laughter echoed as Loki shoved him in the side.


	19. Chapter 19

The pool was an old friend, a stop he always took on his journey, a ritual almost. A baptism, getting really clean before the fairs.

He undressed and left his clothes on a rock, getting his hard bar of soap out of his pack. Technically you were meant to grate and boil it to create a lather, but anything was better than nothing.

The weeds and algae felt strange beneath his toes, the chill water sending goosebumps across his skin, muscles tensing as he eased himself into it. Once he was in, it would be fine, but actually steeling himself to dunk his head...

Deep breath...

The water closed over his head, that momentary feeling of complete immersion overwhelming before he gasped back to the surface.

Right... Time to get properly clean. He scrubbed himself methodically, from his legs upwards, watching the water flow away from him, bringing up fresh, pink skin. The goats were taking the time to rest and even Loki lay down and curled up, unused to all this walking.

As he rinsed his hair, Thor felt an idea sneak into his head. Since Loki had arrived, he hadn't indulged his physical wants at all. It had seemed rude and he didn't want to make him uncomfortable. And evidently he was unlikely to have any intimate encounters this year to scratch that particular itch.

So since Loki was sleeping...

The water felt almost warm now as he reached for his cock, trying to think of his perfect man, someone strong but lithe, imagining kisses against his neck, little moans, hips grinding against his own. Spreading his legs in welcome, letting his hands roam across a long back and down...

His breathing had sped up, eyes falling shut as he imagined whispers in his ear, telling him how desirable he was, wanted, bewitching...

Abruptly, he realised it was Loki's voice he was imagining. Loki's lips and hands, Loki above him with his hair falling forward, looking so certain of what he wanted but unsure of how to go about it.

"Kiss me?" he'd say, and Thor would lean up and...

No, he shouldn't. He shouldn't be having these thoughts. It was wrong and invasive.

His cock throbbed beneath the ripples, almost reproachfully. He couldn't very well get out of the water like this...

No more fantasies. Strictly finishing, firm, strong pulls. Physical, not mental stimulation. Yes, it likely wouldn't be quite as satisfying but he didn't deserve it after that. Loki was his friend. If he found out that such a thought had even passed his mind... Well, it would ruin everything, this easy relationship they had. Loki might even run away and then he'd be unable to help him, unable to protect him.

Yes, alright, he was attractive and Thor felt drawn to him, but that was no reason to ruin what they had.

The faint splashing sounds nearly covered his grunts as he grew close, finally spilling into the water, the little white cloud quickly dissipating and flowing downstream.

Thor sighed, angry at his own weakness, dipped himself in fresh water one last time and began wading out of the pool once more.

And found Loki looking at him, a faintly curious expression on his face. How long had he been watching? Hopefully not long.

Thor combed his hair and braided it, letting his skin mostly dry off before getting dressed and rousing the herd with some clicks of his tongue and murmurs to set off again.

"I'm afraid I might have to tether you now," he said to Loki, acting like nothing had happened. "Sorry."

He stood still for Thor to loop a thin rope into the collar, looking like merely a man leading a goat, the town coming into view soon enough. It was a nice place, a county town, much bigger than Thor's home. And soon to be bustling with livestock and produce.

"We'll find a place for the girls to stay and then go for a walk," he said. "Let me know when the change is coming. Then we can start making inquiries."

Loki nudged at his hand, licking him. Was that a thank you?

"You're welcome," Thor said, smiling down at him and hating that his treacherous mind and body had conspired to give him such inappropriate desires.

The market place had been set up with pens for animals and Thor was able to get a smallish space for the herd complete with hay and turnips for a reasonable price.

"What about your billy?" the foreman asked.

"No, no," Thor said. "He's sticking with me. I've had a few people wanting him, thinking he's that royal one that went missing, never mind that I've had him eight years. I'd rather keep him close. Just in case anyone thinks of lifting him."

He seemed a little offended by the implication that they wouldn't be able to deter thieves, but Thor pretended not to notice.

"Right," he murmured as they wandered out. "Your first night on the town. Let's explore."

They'd made it around several of the main streets before Loki grabbed Thor's sleeve and dragged him into a small alleyway, bracing his forelegs on the wall and changing in an instant.

So far, so good, Thor thought as he scrambled into his clothes. They'd made it past the first hurdle.

"There was a pharmacy a few streets back. A medical professional might be a good place to start?" he said.

Thor nodded. "Let's check when they're due to open and get ourselves some food. I'm starving."

Half past eight in the morning, apparently. Long before the market was due to be begin. Hopefully the streets would be fairly quiet.

Thor led Loki to an inn he knew well - cheap but cheerful - and secured a room before ordering two ales and two meat pies.

"I've never had ale before," Loki said as they sat down. "We generally drank wine."

"It's perhaps an acquired taste, but frankly I wouldn't trust the water around here."

He did his best not to smile too much as Loki took the most tentative possible sip.


	20. Chapter 20

Three tankards later and Thor realised that the weak beer had got Loki decidedly tipsy. And tipsy Loki was giggly. Maybe it was time for bed a little earlier than planned before he drew too much attention.

The innkeeper gave them an odd look, clearly making assumptions that made Thor cringe, but made no attempt to stop them, Loki swaying a little as they went upstairs, flopping onto the bed.

"Mm..." he said happily. "So soft."

And then he sat bolt upright, pointing at Thor accusingly.

"You are not wearing the collar," he said. "You promised you would wear it."

Thor laughed and rolled his eyes before getting it out of his pocket and looping it around his neck.

"Happy now?"

Loki flopped backwards again, sighing and trailing his fingers over the threadbare but pretty quilt that covered the bed. Someone had clearly put a lot of care and work into making it.

"What were you doing today?" he asked. "In the pool?"

Thor felt his face fall, his skin going cold. He had seen then. He had noticed.

"Nothing," he said.

Loki giggled. It was a nice sound, carefree and joyful. At any other time, Thor might be giggling too.

"Liar. You were... self-pleasuring."

Was there any point in denying it?

"Alright, yes. I was. It's a perfectly natural thing. Don't act like you've never..."

It was out of his mouth before he thought about it. Maybe Loki hadn't ever. If he'd been monitored so intently, maybe the opportunity had never arisen or maybe he didn't know how...

Evidently he knew how. He'd recognised it. And it wasn't like someone taught you, after all. It rather... came naturally, as it were.

"Of course I have," Loki said, pouting at the ceiling. "I know you think I'm innocent to the point of ignorance, but I do know how my cock works, thank you. I was just surprised to see you doing it so openly."

Thor closed the curtains, shutting out the outside world and with it the faint light of the guttering street lanterns. They were a new arrival, only in the past few years, still a little strange to Thor. Used to night time being dark.

"I thought you were asleep," he said, carefully crossing the floor to the bed and sitting to take off his shoes. "I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."

Loki patted him on the shoulder. Or tried to. He missed in the darkness and mostly caught his arm.

"Not at all. Like you say, it's only natural."

Still, Thor was a little troubled as he got under the covers, keen to change the subject. The collar felt strange, but not unpleasant. He'd probably forget about it soon.

"You know I shall have to conduct some business tomorrow?" he said. "Early inquiries for the kids and so on. You'll find it boring, most likely, but I'm afraid I must."

"But we'll visit the pharmacy first?"

"Yes. Try not to get your hopes up though. These are early days, after all."

He was partially saying it to himself. The longer he was around Loki, the bigger the danger that he'd accidentally say or do something that would make him uncomfortable. He'd have to be extra vigilant of himself.

It certainly did not help that Loki positively snuggled up to him, even hooking a leg around his body before falling asleep. Thor lay awake for a long time listening to his own breathing and woke with the dawn, birdsong outside so peaceful next to his whirling thoughts.

Loki groaned and pulled the pillow over his head.

"Thirsty," he muttered.

"I'll go ask for tea," Thor said, also wanting to check if the coast was clear. They'd need somewhere secluded for Loki to change back. Or floors with plenty of rugs where his hooves wouldn't clatter too much.

The innkeeper's daughter was up and scrubbing tables, looking at him curiously as he asked her to heat some water. It was only after she'd gone to the kitchen that he realised he was still wearing the collar, hurriedly taking it off. So much for being inconspicuous.

Still, there didn't seem to be too many people around yet. It shouldn't be too hard to find a hidden area. It was the noise he was more concerned about.

He smiled brightly at the young woman, pretending she'd just been imagining his strange jewellery, thanking her and paying for the tea.

Loki was sitting upright when he arrived, still in bed, reaching for liquid and drinking just a little too quickly. His eyes were bright, his cheeks a little red. Like he was warm. And there was an unusual smell in the room too...

Oh, he hadn't! Surely not.

Though Thor was hardly in a position to moralise, was he? Just lucky he was able to finish before he came back into the room or things might have been distinctly more awkward.

And hopefully he'd not just done it into the bed. They did have to sleep there the next few nights after all.

"It's fairly quiet," Thor said, taking his own sip of tea. "We should be able to sneak out without trouble. What do you think we should ask the pharmacist?"

"I've met a lot of doctors and other men of science," Loki said. "But I don't have a disease. I have a curse. Most don't believe in them. I think you should ask about a wise woman. They're more likely to be of use."

Thor should have guessed that they'd have trouble. He returned the tea tray while Loki headed round the back as though he was heading to the out house - perhaps if anyone heard him, they'd merely think him ill - and they reconvened at the corner of the yard.

It was a nice day, the whitewashed walls and timber frames of the buildings shining merrily in the sunlight. The pharmacist's door was propped open by a large geode, a fascinating specimen, though of course Thor had other business.

The man looked up from his preparations with a degree of interest at the prospect of a new customer that quickly turned to wide-eyed shock.

"Sir! This is a respectable establishment. You can't bring an animal in here."

Thor was genuinely taken aback. He didn't think of Loki as an animal. He hadn't even considered that there might be an issue.

"I have to keep him close by in case of thieves, I'm afraid," Thor said. "Don't worry. He's well domesticated."

He was definitely going to have to buy something to ease the insult.

"I'm here for two reasons," he said, trying to think of something cheap to purchase. "Firstly on behalf of myself and secondly for my... wife."

"What's your complaint?" the man asked, taking off his glasses.

Er...

"Digestion issues," Thor said. "I get terrible pains in the gut. Burning sensation."

"Too much acid," the man said, reaching behind him for a large jar and scoop. "Easily remedied with an anti-acidic compound. And your wife's problem?"

"She is pregnant. We seek a midwife and since you are a medical man, I wondered if..."

"Yes. Medicine. Not folk magic. I can recommend a proper physician if you wish."

Out of politeness, Thor accepted the name and paid for the pastilles to cure the stomach problems that he didn't really get, heading out again with his heart falling. Loki nudged into his side, clearly similarly disappointed.

"It's alright," Thor murmured. "He's so jumped up about it that there must be a midwife here. Poaching his customers maybe. We just need to ask the right people. Keep an eye out for babies."

Of course, as soon as he said that it seemed like the town hadn't had a birth in at least five years. Where were all the infants?

They hadn't spotted a single one before it was time for Thor to head back to the marketplace. He had to make a living after all.

Maybe there would be someone there. You never knew who might turn up.


	21. Chapter 21

Were prices really down this year or was everyone just cross with him for insisting that Loki was not for sale and trying to rip him off?

He was offered huge sums for the black goat, asked for stud rights - which made Loki bleat in alarm, as if Thor would ever allow such a thing - and generally pestered non stop, all of them clearly thinking of presenting him as the missing royal goat.

He could practically see their eyes shine with imagined gold.

He was negotiating a price on two of the male kids - to be honoured at the end of the season when they'd be weaned - when Loki grabbed his sleeve.

"Mm," Thor said, trying to be subtle as he followed where Loki was pointing with his foreleg. "If you have a mark or somesuch that I could paint onto them, I'd be happy to take a deposit."

A woman? Was that who he was looking at? Why?

And then someone else moved and Thor saw what had attracted Loki's attention. She was pregnant, near the end of the process if Thor was any judge, resting against one of the the pens to give her legs some relief. She was dressed in shades of red, what would be a voluminous dress had it not been filled by her belly.

The man he was talking to noticed, glancing over his shoulder.

"Ah," he said knowingly. "I know. Shocking. She ought to be in confinement, but she moved here with no husband. I doubt there ever was one to begin with, mind. Probably here to try to snare one - steer clear!"

He laughed and ignored that Thor didn't join in.

"I've had bad experiences with deposits," the man said. "I'd rather pay the full price on delivery."

"I'm afraid I can't do that," Thor said. "Good day."

A man who was cruel to women might well be cruel to goats, he reasoned. Though at this rate, he'd be going home with too many goats and not nearly enough money.

He tried to be subtle as he made his way through the crowd, tried not to appear threatening.

"Would you like me to find you a chair, madam?"

She seemed shocked at being spoken to politely, looking at him in surprise, brows tight.

"No, thank you," she said. "I'm quite alright where I am."

Thor nodded, like he was just passing the time.

It would be easier to be nonchalant if Loki wasn't gently nudging him in the thigh, of course.

"My apologies for the intrusion," Thor said. "But my wife is also with child. I wondered if you might know a midwife nearby."

She sighed and adjusted her weight a little.

"I do," she said. "But I'm afraid she'll not be traipsing over hill and dale to help with births for a good while yet."

"Why's that?"

"Because she's expecting. You're looking at her."

Ah...

She was younger than he'd expected, though he wasn't sure why he had that prejudice.

"Could I ask you for some advice, then?" he asked. "Over lunch perhaps?"

She looked at him differently somehow, like she was confused.

And Thor suddenly had a real feeling of sickness come over him, like a sudden headache, a feeling like ice hitting him in the back of the head in a way he hadn't felt since snowball fights in his childhood...

The woman's eyes narrowed and then flicked to Loki in the strangest way, like she knew somehow, and Thor had the sudden urge to turn and run and never look back and get as far away from this place as possible and...

As quickly as it came on him, it left again, leaving him gasping. That had not been normal. He'd never felt anything like that before.

She was still looking at him a little strangely.

"I live in the house at the furthest east edge of the town," she said. "Perhaps you and your friend would care to join me in the evening to discuss this... advice for your wife."

"What friend?" Thor croaked.

She pushed herself properly to her feet, striding forward.

"A certain young man with dark hair," she whispered, the crowd seeming to part for her almost unconsciously and then closing back up behind her.

Loki poked at his fingers curiously, maybe even scared.

"No idea," Thor said, hoping he'd guessed the question correctly. "But I'm worried it isn't good."


	22. Chapter 22

Thor got through the rest of the day in something of a daze, but managing somehow to sell one of his goats along with her two kids at least and getting some promise of interest on a couple more males too. Maybe he accepted terrible prices, maybe he charged too much. He'd have to count it later when his mind wasn't so full of other things.

He couldn't stop thinking about the woman in red. It had been so strange. Like she'd reached _into_ him somehow...

Loki changed back in a dark street alongside a stable with only an elderly horse as a witness, getting dressed and ripping the collar off as quickly as possible.

"What are we going to do?" he asked.

"Go and see her," Thor said.

"What? It's a trap! It's obviously a trap!"

Thor shook his head.

"No... No, I don't think so."

"We should at least take a weapon."

Thor stopped at the edge of the alleyway and snorted slightly.

"Loki, I'm not taking a weapon. She's pregnant."

"She's also very evidently a witch and we need to be prepared."

Maybe he had a point. But what did you even use against witches? He tried to think back to what his mother had told him as a child, but not he thought of it, he wasn't sure she'd ever mentioned anything specific.

Iron? Was that it? Running water? But how did you carry that around with you?

Maybe knives worked much the same on witches as on other people.

Then again, he was fairly sure she had looked into his mind as easily as leafing through a book. They would hardly have the element of surprise.

In the end, he managed to convince Loki that the tether would serve as a weapon, for all he had no intent of garrotting anyone if he could possibly avoid it, and they set out in the opposite direction from the setting sun.

What would a witch's house look like? Thor imagined a shack, something tumbledown and decaying.

He wasn't expecting it to look much the same as all the other houses, if a little less well kept. Perhaps it had been home to her predecessor and she hadn't been able to keep it so well in her current condition.

She opened the door just as he raised his knuckles to knock, startling him more than a little.

"You came," she said. "Good. Perhaps you can explain a few things."

Thor was nonplussed, Loki half-hiding behind him as they followed her in, a narrow hallway leading to a room with flagstone floors and rag rugs, herbs hanging from the ceiling and something bubbling over an iron range.

Evidently iron would not have been a suitable weapon on its own then...

"I don't see what we should explain," Thor said. "Surely you already know. I felt you in my mind."

"That's what I meant," she said. "You felt something you shouldn't have been able to. Kindly explain."

None of this was making sense. She gently lowered herself into an overstuffed armchair near the scrubbed wood table, grunting lightly.

"I've never felt anything like that before," Thor said, turning to Loki. "But you felt it too, didn't you?"

"Not as such. I saw you panic. I knew something bad was happening to you, something unpleasant. And then she knew who I am, so..."

"Ah..." the woman said, raising a finger. "I saw you. That's all. I see pictures, I don't hear facts. So if you would kindly explain who you are and what exactly you want, we might be able to come to an arrangement."

Thor looked at Loki, wondering just what to reveal and what to hold back.

"We seek a witch to help break a curse," he said, trying to get to the crux of the issue without giving too much away just in case she wasn't trustworthy.

"A curse. Have you tried true love's first kiss?"

"Yes," Thor said, just as Loki said "Maybe."

She raised her eyebrows at them and Loki huffed, folding his arms.

"I must admit, I'm finding this suspiciously convenient," he said. "The first town we come to and we just happen to find a witch."

She shrugged.

"There is a witch in most towns," she said. "At least one."

"I thought you were mostly burned."

Thor was not sure this antagonistic approach was entirely the right one, laying a hand on Loki's shoulder in an effort to calm him.

"A lot of innocent people were murdered," she said icily. "And some of them may have been witches, but most were not. We tend to hide. We're good at it."

"But not from us."

Narrowed eyes, like she was trying to work something out.

"Most people don't feel it," she said. "And besides, you smell of... of something. Your curse, probably. I'd be happy to help, for the right price."

It was ultimately Loki's decision, so Thor looked to him. He looked back with fear in his eyes.

"She's not having my first born," he said.

She laughed, perhaps bordering on a cackle.

"In case you haven't noticed," she said. "I already have one of my own on the way. I specialise in helping people avoid or encourage pregnancies. But, well... A goat to provide milk for me and my child and to help keep my yard clear of overgrowth would be very useful."

Thor hesitated for a second before shaking her hand.

"Give us the key to break the spell, and you can have your pick of my animals," he said, and then after a moment. "I'm Thor. And this is Loki."

"Pleased to meet you," she said. "Wanda Maximoff, at your service."


	23. Chapter 23

She had Loki sit in the wooden chair opposite her and set Thor to fetching various items. Candles and chalk, a pestle and mortar, specific herbs. It ought to have felt more magical than it did, Thor thought, especially when she set him to stirring the pot and ladling some of the contents out and it turned out to be the lentil soup she planned to have for dinner.

"Right," she said, creating a paste of crushed plants and pushing it across the table. "Using the fourth finger of your left hand, stir this three times and then smear it on your lips."

A little uncertain frown never left Loki's face, but he did has she asked all the same.

"That ought to help with the slight dryness problem you're struggling with," she said, drawing a circle on the table and bisecting it with straight lines multiple times. "And as for the curse... Let's see what it wants."

This was much more like it. The candles began to gutter and smoke, their flames turning first pinkish and then distinctly red. What did that mean?

"Give me your hand."

Loki looked distinctly unsure as he reached across the table, letting her take hold of him, her eyes flickering and rolling back in her head.

If this was a parlour trick, it was very convincing.

She moaned lightly, her grip coming and going in spasms, rocking slightly. Loki didn't seem to be in any discomfort, but did seem vaguely confused.

Eventually, her hand and neck went limp, the candles returning to a more normal yellow glow, her breathing evening out almost like she was asleep. She sat up suddenly, with a gasp, and blinked several times, eyes unfocussed, before that sure and certain gaze came back.

"It's strong," she said. "I've never felt one so strong before. You must have really insulted whoever gave it to you."

"Can it be broken?" Thor asked.

"They can all be broken. It's just finding the flaw that's the hard part. Like the join between tectonic plates or a hairline fracture in a bone. It's usually true love's kiss because it fits into the two vital categories - difficult to find and involves being nice enough to inspire mutuality."

She might as well have been speaking in tongues.

"So he should just start kissing people and hope to find the right one?"

"Not at all," she said, taking a spoonful of soup. "It only works if both parties are truly in love. But this curse... It doesn't necessarily want that, it wants something different."

"What?" Loki snapped, clearly losing patience, unhappy with being talked about like he wasn't there.

Wanda fixed him with a long, slow stare.

"You were given the curse for thinking only of yourself and your legacy," she said. "So to break it, you must commit an act which does not benefit you in any way but which does benefit someone else. A selfless act."

Loki got up with a horrible scrape of his chair, furious.

"That's ridiculous," he said. "I've done things for other people with no thought of the return plenty of times."

"Such as?"

Well, in Loki's defence, Thor couldn't think of the last time he'd done something purely out of kindness either. He got goods in kind from Brunnhilde and Sif, he sold his goats and milk for money... Even with Loki, by helping and protecting him, he got the pleasure of his company and having a friend.

Was any act truly selfless?

"Hang on," Loki said, clearly thinking along the same lines. "But now I know that's how to break the curse, anything nice I do will come with the knowledge that it will fix me and so technically won't be without ulterior motive. It's impossible for me to do it."

Wanda smiled over her soup, dusting the chalk off the table with her sleeve.

"Perhaps. But perhaps not. But that's all I can tell you."

"Wonderful," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Thank you so much."

"You, on the other hand," she said, gesturing vaguely at Thor. "You are still a mystery. I can't work it out."

A shiver came over Thor that had nothing to do with any draughts.

"Work out what?" he asked.

"I barely scratched the surface of your mind at first, but you felt it so strongly. Someone has put protection on you."

Thor scoffed.

"I've never met a witch before, as far as I know," he said. "And I've no idea why they'd bother, frankly."

"They must love you, whoever they are."

She'd finished her soup and leant forward to blow out the candles, leaving them with just the faint glow of the fire and the lamps outside.

"I'll come and collect my payment in the morning," she said, clearly dismissing them. "Good night."

"Are you really going to give her a goat?" Loki asked as they headed out into the night.

"I agreed to it. I think I have to."

"Do you think she's right? That someone has tried to protect you, magically? And about how to break the curse?"

Thor thought about it. Maybe? He really wasn't sure. It might all be made up, after all.

Then again... He had felt her spell on him so clearly. Maybe someone had put a protective charm on him to keep bad witches away. Especially if they'd known what happened to Loki.

"I suppose we'll just have to find out."


	24. Chapter 24

"She's practically cursed me again," Loki said miserably as they grabbed a bite to eat long after most other people had moved on from dinner to more serious drinking.

"How do you mean?"

"It's as I said - all I have to do is something selfless, but now I know that, I can't do anything selfless. Anything selfless I do will benefit me and now I know that and it will be in the back of my mind. I can't physically do it."

That did make a degree of sense, didn't it?

"You can't force it to happen," Thor agreed. "But that doesn't make it impossible. You'll just have to wait and be surprised. Which I suppose makes it like love, in a way. You can't force that either."

Loki gave him a withering look over the top of his tankard of ale - just the one tonight, perhaps.

"I thought you didn't know about love," he said.

"I don't, but that doesn't mean I haven't tried to feel it. When all the young men I knew were falling in love and getting married, I wondered why I did not understand. Why none of the women particularly affected me. Sif was my friend, but I felt no urge to marry her."

Loki wasn't looking at him suddenly. His eyes had gone over Thor's shoulder, something like a mix of wariness and confusion in them. Thor had a quick glance and his heart sank immediately.

He knew the man eyeing them. He couldn't think of his name at present, but they had...

Well... They had spent some time together.

"Is he one of yours?" Loki asked.

"They're not... What do you mean by that? One night means nothing. He's not my anything."

"He keeps raising his drink at me. Looks fairly congratulatory. I think he's wishing me well for the night. Letting me know I've chosen well."

"Loki, don't."

Maybe he was just irritated from the day's events and looking for a distraction, but there was real mischief in Loki's face suddenly.

"What if you were trying to woo me?" he asked. "What would you do?"

Thor felt his stomach clench, his awful secret bubbling under the surface. He had to try to get out of this. But how?

He'd paused too long and Loki sat back a little, evidently slightly offended.

"Fine," he said. "I understand. I'm so thoroughly unattractive that you can't even imagine..."

"No!" Thor said, a little too loudly, lowering his voice. "No, I... I was just thinking. Planning my words. You have to be careful in these matters."

Oh, it shouldn't feel so good to see Loki smile like that, resting his chin in his palm. He'd have to make this good.

"I would talk about your hands first," Thor said. "How elegant they are. How they look so soft. And I'd reach across the table and take one in mine."

Loki almost knocked their plates off as he flung an arm into reach. Thor carefully put them aside as he took it, trying to keep his breathing steady as he ran his own calloused fingers over Loki's skin, comparing them.

"And I would ask how a man with such fine fingers had come to be in a place like this, surrounded by rough men."

"Maybe I like rough men," Loki said.

And then he turned a little pink, but his eyes... His eyes were eager, daring Thor to say something else. He slipped his grip round to Loki's wrist, feeling his pulse, not fluttering but hard and fast.

What was happening here exactly?

"Do you think I'm rough?" he asked, his mouth a little dry.

Loki smiled slightly.

"I think you could be," he said. "But you have a gentle touch."

"Some things need a firm hand. Others... Others you ought to be careful with. They're delicate. You need to be gentle."

"Which do you think I am? What would I need?"

Thor couldn't even look at him, so sure that the truth would be written all over his face. That he wanted to give Loki whatever he wanted. That he wanted to find out what he liked, what he sounded like, how he tasted...

"I'm not sure. It would depend I think. On your mood."

Maybe he was making things strange. Loki paused, but left his hand in Thor's. And then his chair creaked slightly as he leant forward, his voice dropping so low.

"How would you begin? Once you knew I was interested."

"I'd invite you up to my lodgings."

"Alright, invite me."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because I am sharing my room with a dear friend and I wouldn't want to... inconvenience him."

Loki let go of his hand, slowly drawing his arm back. And Thor's heart ached, a threat of tears prickling at his eyes. What was going on? He'd had his desires thwarted often enough and never felt like this before. Like he was losing a friend.

But he was trying to _keep_ a friend. That was all he really wanted. That's why he wasn't pursuing Loki in any way.

"Thor?"

"Hm?"

"I'm... I'm scared."

That shocked him out of his self-pity.

"What of?" he asked, worried he'd seem someone threatening.

A little sigh, a head shake, voice cracking slightly.

"That I'll never break the curse. That we'll be caught before I manage it. That my parents will find us and I'll lose you."

"Oh, you'll be fine. And you will break it. You just have to wait for an opportunity."

He was finally brave enough to look up properly, finding Loki looking so fervent, so sure, so beautiful.

"That's... That's what I've been trying to say," he said. "I don't want to wait for things to happen anymore. I want to take action myself."

"In what way? What do you mean?"

A deep breath.

"I want you to take me upstairs. Like I'm a stranger. Like I'm someone you've met and charmed. Because I'm scared that I'll never have this chance again."

Was he dreaming this? He had to be.

"A chance for what?"

"A chance... to be with someone I trust. Please. I want to."

How was he supposed to resist that? All the same, he was going to tread carefully. This was not simple, after all.

He met Loki's gaze, so sure but so afraid of being rejected.

As if there was any chance of that.

"Alright," he said.


	25. Chapter 25

The stairs seemed incredibly long somehow, each one taking more time than the last. Thor wasn't sure what he was feeling. It wasn't trepidation. Something like excitement, but more... More significant. Like he was about to take some rite of passage or important vow.

Loki was leading the way, seeming more confident than Thor felt, but when they reached their room, it was clear that his hands were trembling a little.

"Are you alright?" Thor asked. "You can change your mind if you want. At any time."

"I'm just excited," Loki said. "And nervous. I don't know... With a man, I've never read how to..."

"Hey... Don't worry. We'll go slow. Anything you're not sure of or you want to ask, just..."

"Will you put on the collar?"

Well, he hadn't been expecting that.

He reached for it all the same, grinning. So demanding! So unafraid to ask for what he wanted. This was very interesting indeed.

"Is that what you want?" he asked, looping the band around his neck. "Should I drop to my knees?"

Loki made a choked sound and Thor couldn't help but laugh a little, pulling Loki close by his hips.

"May I kiss you, Prince Loki?"

Nodding, fervent nodding as Thor pulled him even closer, leaning forward until he could feel the heat of his skin and pressing their lips together.

It was a little clumsy, but that didn't matter. It felt right, felt good, his hands running over all the flesh he'd longed to touch for so long, slipping under his clothes to feel properly.

He could feel everything, the way Loki was arching against him, clinging tight, his breath coming in short gasps.

But kissing him...

The sensation was almost overwhelming, a warmth in his chest that told him he might want nothing more than this ever again. He could feel himself becoming demanding, wanting more, but Loki matched his desire, pulling at his belt in an effort to remove it.

There had been no secrets in the hut about bodies, nowhere to disguise their nakedness, so it wasn't like they hadn't seen each other many times, and yet there was something about undressing one another with purpose, knowing they were not just _allowed_ to look but encouraged to and to touch as well. Enjoying themselves and each other.

Dizzying. Exciting.

He took the time to really touch Loki's skin, marvelling at such simple things. The feeling of the hair on his arms, the softness, the way his own complexion looked so different next to it. Silver and gold. Sunlight on clear water.

There was a strange reverence to his motions, his touch gentle. This was something new for him too. Sex with feelings.

They didn't have any oil, or anything even remotely like it, but that was alright. There were other things they could do together. And maybe it was time to move to the bed before they caught chills, standing naked like this.

A gentle push, more of a suggestion, but Loki practically threw himself back onto the mattress, his arms reaching for Thor once more, welcoming him, asking him to stay close.

"What... What do we do?" he asked, his eyes seeming so big, the light from outside bouncing off his skin almost like flames.

"There's lots of things we could do tonight," Thor said. "We could use our hands or mouths or just our bodies..."

"Like that," Loki said. "That's what I want."

"Alright."

It would likely progress to hands for ease, but for now... Some sorting out of limbs was necessary, interlocking their legs, trying to find enough friction, Loki already instinctively rolling his hips in a way that filled Thor with even more desire somehow.

He pulled Loki on top, his cock so warm and already leaking against his skin. He'd always liked that sensation, the proof that he'd managed to spark arousal in his partner, but it still felt a little different.

Maybe because he'd been yearning so long, thinking his admiration was not returned, and now to discover it was, that Loki wanted him too...

And now here he was, gazing down at him, his hand moving to his neck, touching the collar and no doubt feeling his racing heart beat. Thor turned his head to kiss his wrist, the little sigh from above thrilling him. Nothing else mattered except that he wanted Loki and Loki wanted him.

Rocking together, straining and panting, Thor desperately lunged for Loki's lips once more. Everything felt good when they kissed. He could put his fears and worries aside and only feel.

Speaking of which, he let Loki grow more and more frantic, chasing his pleasure, grinding against his skin before finally reaching for both their lengths, stroking them together as he watched Loki's face. The way he gasped and closed his eyes, the pure intimacy of it, the way they were completely exposed to one another...

He spilled first, sighing out a little moan, working Loki properly until he reached his peak, shuddering and crying out. Perfect. Beautiful.

And maybe he was mumbling those words as he wrapped his arms around him, keeping him as close as possible and never wanting the night to end.


	26. Chapter 26

"Beh..."

"Hmm? Wha...?"

"BEH!"

Ah. Oh, dear. They must have slept late. And now he was cuddling a goat.

There were some people back at home who would make fun of him for years for this.

Maybe part of him had even thought the curse would be broken... But no. He didn't even know what he was feeling, and so probably Loki didn't either. Love's first kiss probably involved at least a little certainty.

"Right," Thor said, getting dressed and making sure he took off the collar this time. "I'll see how busy it is down there but... Well, you might have to hide up here today."

Loki let out something that was probably a sigh. Then again, he settled back in among the blankets, maybe content enough to stay warm and comfortable.

They had definitely left things too late for sneaking out. The inn was full of hustle and bustle, people having breakfast and making deals already. It wasn't safe to bring Loki downstairs, not without drawing too much attention. Thor got him a couple of bread rolls and found him asleep once more, stroking his head gently before heading out.

Wanda had arrived, as expected, looking over his goats and trying to choose one. Thor ignored the looks they were getting, locals obviously judging him for doing business with her. They'd no doubt not mind at all when she was helping their wives or daughters or sisters.

"Which is your favourite?" she asked, surveying the pen.

"I don't have favourites," Thor said. "I love them but I try not to get attached to individuals. It would make selling them too difficult."

She seemed placated by that, looking over them again.

"That one," she said, pointing. "How long before its baby will be old enough to leave it?"

"A few weeks. Perhaps a month."

"Could I take care of both of them until you pass this way again? When the youngster is old enough to rejoin the larger herd, of course."

That seemed like a fair deal. It would save him driving the little one all over the land for one thing.

"Where is his highness, by the way?" she asked as Thor tethered the goat for her.

"Didn't get up on time. He'd already... changed when I woke up."

"Ah."

He felt no horrible chill, so presumably she was not trying to pry into their private business. But then she turned her head to the side, sharp, like a rabbit hearing a rustling in the undergrowth.

"Come with me," she said softly. "Now."

Thor was confused, but she had helped them so far and he trusted her for that. He obediently followed her to a shadowy corner of the market, the goat and its kid with them.

And then he saw what she had no doubt overheard or sensed some other way. Guards, official-looking ones. He wasn't sure what Erfundorf's standard looked like, but who else could it be?

They'd come looking. Looking for Loki, trying to find him among a large gathering of goats. And as they talked with the foreman and some of the others, he could see them gesturing towards his herd, trying to point out the man with the large black goat.

Someone would know where he was staying. Someone would mention his dinner companion.

Loki...

"I have to hide him," Thor said.

"How?"

"I don't know."

"I could take him. And look after your goats if anything happens to you."

He couldn't ask her to do that. It was too dangerous and strenuous for her current condition. But then again, what choice did he have?

"Thank you."

They snuck out of the market, avoiding the front entrance, only to find the guards already at the inn and taking to the innkeeper's daughter.

"Give me your room key," Wanda whispered. "I'll get him out the back way, through the kitchen."

"Tell him to write to my friends if I don't return. Tell them what's happened."

He strolled in, trying to disguise the way his heart was hammering, the fear gripping him so tightly as the young woman spotted him.

"That gentleman there," she said. "I think he's the one you're looking for."

They all turned to him as he tried to put on his most innocent face, trying not to look guilty as he watched for a flash of red sneaking up the stairs.

"What seems to be the problem?" he asked. "Has something happened?"

They dismissed the woman with a grunt and a handwave - which she was visibly not impressed by - and practically surrounded him.

"Where is the goat?" one asked, presumably the leader.

Thor forced an easy smile. Be stupid. Be easy-going. Be as unhelpful as possible.

"You'll have to be more specific than that, I'm afraid. I have over a dozen. Good, strong stock. Are you looking to buy?"

Narrowed eyes, suspicion.

"You've been seen having meals with a young man with dark hair."

"I was unaware that was a crime."

"Where is this young man?"

"I believe he was merely passing through the town. Lots of people are, at this time of year. We split the cost of a room these past couple of nights, but he wasn't the most talkative sort. I didn't pry into his business."

Wanda appeared at the bottom of the stairs, sweeping past them. This was not the back way! Thor's heart dropped. No goat. No Loki. What was she doing?

But then he noticed something, something slightly off about the shape of her. He couldn't work out what. Every time he tried to look properly, it was as though he couldn't focus.

A spell, perhaps? Hiding him in plain sight?

The guards acted like they hadn't even seen her.

"Take us to the room you shared."

God, he hoped she'd actually got Loki out...

And at least he was able to cause more trouble, having conveniently mislaid his key and having to get the innkeeper to grant them entry with a spare.

She'd taken Loki's clothes too, the collar even. There was no sign of him. Goodness only knew how she'd managed to hide his hoof beats on the stairs.

Poor thing would be so scared. Just when they'd really been growing close too.

He scolded himself. Thwarted affairs were not the point. Ensuring Loki's safety was the point.

The head guard still had them ransack the place. Was there anything that might give him away? Dirty sheets were hardly uncommon. What else, what else...?

"Eat off the floor, do you?" one of the men asked.

Shit. A half-eaten roll under the bed. The food he'd left for Loki.

Still, it proved nothing.

"Must have dropped it," Thor said.

The leader gestured to his men to leave, but just as Thor thought he was going to get away with it, he closed the door to talk to him alone.

"Where is the prince? We know you know. We have multiple witnesses who say you have a black goat and have been seen with a man who matches his exact description."

Thor wasn't planning to give up now.

"I have no idea what you're talking about. So I had a black goat. They're not exactly uncommon. And I was with a man. So what? He was no prince. Not that I knew."

"No one has seen this man during the day."

"He sleeps late. I'm not his keeper. I don't know where he goes."

"What is his name?"

"His... Uh..."

A name! Any name!

"Johan."

Where had that come from? He didn't even know a Johan.

The man got into his face, or tried to. He was rather stocky and shorter than Thor, but still rather intimidating with his black uniform and obvious weapons.

"We will find him," he said. "And you can either help us and be rewarded or obstruct us and be punished."

"I can hardly help or obstruct. I don't understand who you are looking for. First it was a goat, now it's a prince... Which are you really looking for?"

"Both!"

Thor felt sorry for him. It must be difficult, having one task and having failed at it for months now. The King and Queen might not have endless patience.

"I'm afraid I can't help you."

A set jaw, a scowl and a jerk of his head.

"We'll see about that. I have more questions. Come on. You can choose if you'd like shackles or not."

There were too many of them to fight. Thor elected to go quietly.

After all, the more time they wasted on him, the more time Loki would have to escape.


	27. Chapter 27

They took him to the town hall, an imposing stone building, all oversized doors and huge spires, almost like a cathedral. He'd walked past it dozens of times before, but had never had a reason to go in.

Inside was similarly impressive, beautiful tiled floors and shields upon the walls, the local nobility and various visitors' coats of arms. At another time, Thor might have been more interested. As it was, he was beginning to worry about his immediate wellbeing.

"I'm perfectly happy to come with you, of course," he said. "Though if you could tell me what crime I am accused of, that would be helpful."

They didn't seem to want to tell him, but at least put him in a room rather than a cell as such. Presumably it was ordinarily used by clerks or scribes as there was a lot of paper around the place. No sign of pen or ink though. He couldn't write even a coded word of warning to Brunnhilde.

How long was he in there, staring at the walls? He wasn't sure. His fear turned to anger, though he tried to stay calm. They had nothing on him, nothing at all, and here they were impeding his business and preventing him going about his day.

Hadn't even had lunch...

It was probably the afternoon when the head guard reappeared.

"We spoke with your friend," he said.

"Which friend is that?"

"The woman Maximoff."

"I sold her a couple of goats but I'd hardly say she was my friend."

Had they found Loki? He had to assume not. They'd be leading with that, surely.

"She showed us the animals. And she says she saw the black goat but does not know its whereabouts now."

"I sold him."

A skeptical look.

"Half the market tried to buy it, or so I hear. You were unmoved."

"Johan made me an offer I couldn't refuse."

"Ah. The mysterious Johan. And yet we have heard from multiple people staying at the same inn as you that the young man's name was Loki. That you called him Loki multiple times. That they never once heard any other name."

A bluff. Surely. Maybe?

"They're mistaken," Thor said.

A sigh. Heavy and long suffering.

"I don't like being a cruel man," the guard said. "I don't like to threaten or to torture. It's not much fun. But if you don't help me, I may have to resort to such methods."

"Seems to me that even mentioning torture might well be construed as a threat. I don't know anything about a goat or a prince or a Loki."

Another look of utter distrust. And then a knock at the door, an underling bringing water and bread and cheese. At least they weren't planning to try to starve it out of him.

The water smelled strange, though. He couldn't put his finger on it, but it did. Probably city water. Everyone knew it wasn't safe to drink unboiled.

"Could I have beer instead?" Thor asked. "Or milk? My mother always told me to avoid water unless I'd seen the stream myself."

He was trying their patience, but they brought him an ale all the same. It still smelled strange. And tasted strange. Poisoned? No, they still needed him, needed what he knew.

Suddenly, he could feel it. That same chill as when Wanda had looked into his mind. There was magic afoot here. Some kind of potion perhaps? Something to make him more amenable? He stood up, but his legs were shaky, forcing him to lean on the wall.

"What is your name?" the guard asked.

"Thor Odinson."

"How old are you?"

"Around thirty. I don't know exactly."

"Where is the goat?"

The truth almost immediately sprang to his lips. He had to fight it so hard. What had they done to him? He tried to protest, but he didn't seem able to get any words out. What was this?

"My goats are in the market place," he managed, knees growing weak.

"No. The black goat."

It _hurt..._ Trying to say something untrue hurt. It was like his lies were pins and every time he tried to speak one, it stabbed his throat and tongue. Not all torture left bruises.

Still, he didn't have to lie. He just had to avoid the whole truth.

"I don't know," he said, tears in his eyes. "Gone away."

"Was your companion Prince Loki?"

He couldn't keep back the grunt. He could hold it back, for all it felt like he had to vomit, to viscerally get the truth out of his body. How to get out of this?

"Don't hurt yourself, Thor. Just tell the truth. Was your companion Prince Loki?"

"No..."

"No, he wasn't Prince Loki?"

Nodding was agony. Like he was going to snap his neck with just a tiny motion.

He was lying and it had to be written all over his face, not least because his breath was ragged and painful, his body twitching with effort. They knew he was fighting it. But he was fighting it, fighting and winning. He could do this.

God, he hoped Wanda had managed to hide Loki well.

The guard sighed and left the room as he collapsed to the floor, gasping for air.

"My name is Thor Odinson," he tried, feeling better for saying something true. "My father was Odin, my mother was Frigga. I keep goats by a little hut in the mountains..."

It left him after a while, the pain. Whether that meant he'd told enough truths, or if he'd managed to get it out of his system somehow, he wasn't sure.

He ate, figuring it was best to keep his strength up. He worried about Loki. Worried about his goats. Wondered what they would do to him now, since their first attempts at getting the truth from him had failed.

He stayed on the floor, feeling thoroughly miserable.

And then they came for him.


	28. Chapter 28

"Move. Come on."

"Where are we going?"

"Erfundorf."

Were they serious? It was so far away. They'd be going a long way away from where they suspected Loki was.

"My goats," Thor protested. "I can't just leave them."

"They will be taken care of. Move."

This seemed decidedly like bad news and Thor had had enough. They couldn't just swan in here and disrupt his life like this with no consequences.

He sat down on the floor and folded his arms, daring them to try to shift him. You didn't just move a large man like him without some trouble. And then he raised his eyebrows at them and waited.

The first man to approach did his best, taking Thor's arm and pulling. A second man joined him. Thor shrugged them off easily. He didn't want to hurt them though. They were only doing their jobs, after all.

As such, he kept smiling at them, like this was all a huge joke as he slipped his arms away every time they tried to get a grip.

And then he heard a sigh from the doorway. The leader of the little band.

"I had hoped we could do this without violence. If you'd rather be led away bound, that's up to you."

He pulled out a knife, a small one, almost surgical and Thor suddenly worried that it was not standard issue. That was a personal weapon.

It was too great a risk to call it a bluff if it turned out not to be...

He put his arms behind his back and let them loop ropes around them. He was a distraction, that was all, giving Loki time to get away. He could deal with being tied up a little bit.

And he would try and succeed in ignoring the fear in his heart about his own safety.

Still, people were not comfortable seeing him being marched through the streets and put into a carriage for no discernible reason. A small crowd of onlookers gathered, curious about what was going on. Another chance for Thor to make a nuisance of himself.

"Nothing to worry about," he called cheerfully. "Misunderstanding!"

He was hoping to see Wanda. He was having to trust her a lot. With his and Loki's very lives. He needed her to report what had happened.

Was that her at the back? The woman in the hood? Perhaps.

She was probably hiding. Sensible.

As they closed the door on him, he could only hope.

He'd never been in such a vehicle before. A cart from time to time, yes, but this was very nice indeed. Cushioned seats, sturdy wood. If they thought this was some kind of punishment, they were mistaken.

Of course, he knew this attitude was artificial to an extent. His optimism had often been a shield. Ever since he was a child, he'd been the one getting up and pretending not to be hurt by scraped knees or pretending not to be scared no matter what. It was part of him, his way of dealing with the world.

And it was being sorely tested.

He slept. There didn't seem much else to do. He couldn't exactly dive out of the carriage and walk back. They'd catch him immediately. It was difficult enough getting onto his stomach to sleep without crushing his own hands. There was no way he'd manage to manipulate the latch on the door.

It wasn't stopping that woke him so much as his hunger. He'd not had breakfast and only ate a very small lunch. The door was opened into a sunset, Thor not even bothering to sit up.

"Are you going to feed me?" he asked. "Only I'm not much fun when I'm hungry."

His new friend, the leading guard, jerked a thumb at him. What was the point of resisting?

Was this the palace? It was certainly a handsome building. The kind of thing Thor had always imagined when his mother told him fairytales. Towers and thin windows, a portcullis even.

"Where are we going now?" he asked.

"The Queen will wish to see you."

The Queen? Really? That seemed quick. 

Loki's mother. Right. Yes. The woman whose son he was concealing and with whom he had done some adult things. Right.

This was fine.

"Do I have to be bound when I see her?" Thor asked. "It hardly seems respectful."

"I think she will prefer it, yes."

"Why?"

Evidently that was a question too far as he was led through a series of narrow, dark corridors, and finally into a large room with no windows.

Was this where they had kept Loki?

All those years with only occasional walks outside, unable to even see the sky...

It made him all the more determined to protect Loki by being as unhelpful as humanly possible.


	29. Chapter 29

He didn't see her until she moved. There were candles everywhere, huge candlesticks with dozens on them, almost making an artificial daylight. The Queen was sitting in a large pile of cushions, almost sunk into them.

The first thing Thor realised was that she was very beautiful. He could see what she had given Loki so clearly, the dark hair though hers was streaked with grey, the fine cheekbones, the lips that were somehow thin but soft at the same time.

The second thing he noticed was that she was very thin. Not a natural thinness but the gaunt look of someone who often went without food. Too sad to eat?

Her son was missing, to be fair. He'd run away. From her.

From this... very beautiful and opulent cage.

She was bird-like, looking at him curiously, waving him forward.

"So..." she said in a clear voice, like a bell tolling. "You're the one who has bewitched my son?"

They must have sent a messenger ahead to tell her what he'd done, but that was no reason to stop obfuscating.

"I have no idea why I'm here," Thor said before adding, "Your majesty. Something about a goat, apparently."

Her eyes slipped off him like oil from water, like he wasn't worth the attention, addressing his guard.

"Was he like this all the time?"

"Yes, your highness. That's why we brought him. He's strong and very determined. Even resisted the truth serum."

"Or I might have just been telling the truth," Thor said, chancing his arm but unable to stop himself.

She sighed in a way that was so like Loki, heaving herself to her feet and approaching him. Her appearance was even more striking when she stood, so tall and elegant, slow, deliberate steps.

"I have not yet dined," she said, sounding tired. "And I fear you have not, either. Come, eat with me. Unbind his hands."

"Are you sure, your highness? We don't know what he's capable of."

She reached out to take hold of Thor's chin in one gloved hand, turning him one way and then the other.

"Quite sure," she said. "He has a kind face. All accounts said Loki was unharmed. I'm sure I will be safe."

Thor did not trust this, even as his arms were let go and he was able to rub some life back into his wrists. They could be about to dose him with something stronger than the first truth drug, or worse somehow.

He followed her through to another windowless room. How large had Loki's suite been? How had they managed to close off part of the palace without anyone noticing?

There was a long table here, and beautiful chairs, the backs carved with patterns of vines and grapes. Wonderful craftsmanship. Very expensive. Thor paused both out of interest and bloody-mindedness to look at his properly.

"Please, sit."

She'd sat to one side, the largest chair at the head of the table covered with a velvet cloth. Loki's chair, presumably. Being kept nice for him.

Thor sniffed at the food cautiously, though his mouth watered at it too. Foods he mostly knew but had never had. Steak. Saffron. Some kind of vegetable he'd never seen before.

"What is this?" he asked, spiking it on his fork.

"Asparagus."

Knowing the name didn't much help, but he ate it anyway. Not bad. Nothing to write home about, but fine. And he was hungry, eating everything rather faster than he might have if he'd been in a savouring situation.

"You were able to resist a truth serum, they say," the Queen said conversationally. "That takes a lot of effort. You seem very keen to hide Loki from us."

"I don't know who this Loki is," Thor said, half through a mouthful of potatoes. "I'm just a goat guy. And now I'm here having a nice dinner, which is lovely, but I really can't help you."

She sliced her food into small pieces. Delicate but she handled the knife dextrously. Thor couldn't help but wonder if she was imagining using it on him. Carving up his flesh.

"Leave us, please," she said. "I want to talk with him alone."

He expected the guards to protest, but they merely exchanged a glance before walking out of the room in perfect step. It wasn't like he wouldn't be caught immediately if he tried anything.

Thor waited for her to speak. Waited to be interrogated again. But she continued eating calmly. Gathering her thoughts. Pushed the plate away after touching maybe a third of it.

"Are you a parent, Mr Odinson?" she asked.

"No," he said. "I'm unmarried."

A nod. A sigh.

"I prayed for a child. An heir for my husband. We had tried for a long time before Loki came along. My son. And then at twelve, he was taken from us."

"He vanished. I remember."

"You know he didn't. You know. I can tell. You're not surprised by any of this. These rooms, this search. I just want to know the truth about my child. I want to know what I did to drive him away."

She was so sad. Heartbroken. And Thor found himself aching for her. But he couldn't tell her. He couldn't betray Loki like that.

"I'm just a man who keeps goats," he said. "I'm sorry."

She smiled at him with tears in her eyes.

"You're loyal. That's good. Loyalty is always welcome. But you're also a liar, and a bad one at that."

Thor opened his mouth to protest, but she had already stood up and gone to the door, opening it and ordering the guards to take him away. Where, she didn't specify, and he assumed the dungeons. But instead he was taken to a bedroom, again without windows. Loki's bedroom? Keeping him away from other people.

They closed the door and he heard the distinct sound of a lock clicking.

Well, then. All the luxury he could imagine. A feather bed, beautiful paintings and tapestries, well stocked bookshelves...

And no way out.

He sighed and began blowing out the candles.

Might as well try to relax at least.


	30. Chapter 30

Loki would be human by now. Thor lay on his bed and worried. He'd be so scared. What would he be thinking? What would he do? Would he stay with Wanda or try to hide somewhere else?

Somehow, he slept. It felt wrong. The bed was much too soft. And too empty, of course. More than once, he woke up and automatically felt for Loki in this too dark, too quiet room.

They woke him the next day by bringing a tub and relighting his candles. Hot water to bathe in. Sweet smelling soap. Loki really had been slumming it with him, hadn't he?

They brought him new clothes even, his old ones removed possibly to be washed, probably to be burned as unhealthy. The new shirt didn't fit completely, but then again, he was left alone most of the day. The few people he saw, servants and guards, did not speak to him. They brought him food. They took away his chamber pot when necessary.

But mostly, he was left alone. He read some of Loki's books and felt his heart aching. Books about the stars. About far off places. Things that told him about a wish to escape, to see other places.

Surely, at some level, he must have known he was being kept secret. The lack of windows, for one thing. Were they bricked up? Or were these internal rooms, built within the palace structure?

The lack of company was something Thor could handle, what with being so isolated most of the year, but the lack of nature... That was hard. He wanted to be outside. He wanted to see the sky. Smell grass, hear birds.

After a day or two, he was taken to see the Queen over dinner again.

"Your mother was Frigga Odinson," she said, with no further preamble. "Born Frigga Vanir."

"She was," Thor said, confused. "But I don't see why or how you know that."

A smile, not a hint of happiness in it.

"It took some time to go through my archive. But it explains how you were able to resist the potion. Your mother was a witch."

Thor looked up from his meal and laughed uproariously. What a ridiculous notion.

"My mother was a midwife, not a witch."

The Queen was decidedly unimpressed.

"My son was cursed by a witch," she said softly. "So it was very much in my interest to find out where the witches were. In case they could help."

That at least explained where they got the truth serum from...

"And could they?"

"They told me to let him fall in love. But he was a child, so we had to wait. Had to try other options. And nothing worked. We consulted with all the witches we could find, including your mother. According to the notes, she was unable to assist."

Thor felt slightly sick. How had he not known that about his mother? She'd never told him. And he didn't remember her being questioned, but then again, there had always been strangers around the house. Why would he have noticed a soldier in particular?

But it made sense. She had been an excellent healer. Miraculous almost. And Wanda had said, hadn't she, that someone had laid a protection spell on him? Someone who loved him. Who loved him more than his own mother?

Could he have inherited something from her? Was that why he could feel magic? Or was it the effects of her spell on him, a warning?

He made himself shrug.

"So my mother's name is on one of your lists," he said. "So what? I still don't know anything about your son."

"Liar. You genuinely did not know about your mother, that much is clear. But you have seen my Loki. And my patience with this absurd charade is running out."

Distract, his mind said. Make her think about something else. Buy more time.

"Where's the King, by the way?" he asked. "Do I not warrant his attention?"

This was a sore point, it seemed. Her eyes narrowed, looking away, putting down her cutlery. She'd barely touched her food.

"I fear he does not share my passion for ensuring our son's safe return."

Ah. Trouble in the royal marriage. And she hadn't sounded particularly enthusiastic about the trying for a child either.

Loki was all she had. But she'd wanted him to do something he didn't want, to trap him in a loveless marriage like her own. And so he'd left. He'd left her all alone in the beautiful prison she'd built for him.

"Surely his son and heir," Thor tried. "His only son..."

"He has other children," she said. "It's just I who does not."

She got up and left without another word. Thor was left to finish his meal and then taken back to the room that was his entire world at present.

A few days later, he was taken to dinner and introduced to Angerboda, Loki's fiancee. He wasn't sure why. Presumably to tug on his heartstrings. Look how lost she is. Bring back her love.

She seemed rather young, he thought, a decade younger than him perhaps. Beautiful, with thick red hair in huge plaits. A gentle bloom on her cheeks.

"Do you want to marry the prince?" Thor asked once the awkward silence had got the better of him.

She seemed very surprised at being addressed directly. She glanced sideways at the Queen, eyes wide before looking down at her plate, demure and quiet.

"Of course," she said. "Of course I do."

Thor didn't believe a word of that.

"So you're comfortable with him having affairs then?"

A clatter as the Queen dropped her knife. This was thin ice, Thor knew, but he was so bored that he couldn't stop himself.

"My son will not have affairs," she said, her words practically freezing the air around them.

"His father does," Thor shrugged.

Her nostrils flared, shoulders heaving, like she wanted to strike him down where he sat.

"He is not his father. Angerboda is his true love and he is hers. True meaning faithful. That's all that matters."

By the look of it, Angerboda wasn't so sure about that. But he had no time to insinuate anything else. The guards took him away to finish his meal alone.

He didn't see the Queen again for another week.

And by that time, she had news.


	31. Chapter 31

"There is a woman here who claims to have information about my son's whereabouts," the Queen said, pacing his room irritably from side to side. "And she refuses to speak or let anything pass her lips until she sees evidence of your safety."

"What woman?" Thor asked. Surely Wanda had been in no position to travel.

"She says her name is Bryn something."

"Brunnhilde?"

So they managed to contact her and formulate a plan of some kind. But what plan? It wasn't like they could communicate it to him.

"So you know her. You do know about Loki?"

Thor paused for a moment before trying to back-up furiously.

"If she has any information, she must have found it out specifically to come here to help me."

That seemed reasonable enough, didn't it? As stories went. Plausible.

"Can I see her?" he asked. "To prove that I am well."

Apparently yes, if the guard coming to tie his arms was anything to go by. What they thought he was at risk of doing if he was loose, he had no idea. Fight his way out, probably.

Brunnhilde was in the main room, the one Thor only ever passed through on his way to the dining room and back, flanked by two guards. She'd dressed for the occasion. Not her usual blacks and greys, strong sturdy clothing for tramping over hills and doing dirty work in, but a dress. He hadn't seen her in a dress for years.

It was purple.

She visibly relaxed to see him, safe and well. Other than the torture of being horribly bored most of the time, he was being very well treated. Well fed and watered, kept cleaner than he had been ever his life before. All his physical needs were attended to.

"How are they treating you?" she asked.

"Fine. I miss being outdoors, but that's all. And they keep insisting that I know something about the missing prince."

He hoped she'd understand that his story was based entirely around denying everything.

"What information do you bring, miss?" the Queen asked, nervously picking at her hands.

"I... I have heard rumours that the goat has been seen five leagues from here."

"And how did you know my son and the goat are one and the same?"

Ah. Yes. She'd said she knew where Loki was, not the goat. Shit. It was an obvious lie and she had been caught. For a moment Thor feared for her very life, but then she reached slowly into a pocket - aware of the large halberds either side of her - and pulled out a letter.

"I have a message from your son," she said. "Written in his own hand."

There was a heavy pause.

"Read it to me," the Queen said, anxiously stalking about the room again.

One of the guards snatched the piece of paper from Brunnhilde's hand and unfolded it, clearing his throat. Maybe he was the one who called out names at balls too.

"My dearest Mother," he began. "I am sorry to have left you, but please believe I did it for the right reasons. The curse is my burden and I shall find a way to break it. The man you have taken is a dear friend. He has helped me, taken me into his home and shared all he had with me, even going hungry that I might eat..."

Wow. Thanks, Loki. No chance he was getting away with the lies anymore.

"Please release him. I have run again. He no longer knows where I am and so cannot help you. Let him go. With all my love, your son, Loki."

Thor watched the Queen's face. The frown. The pain of it. She reached out until the letter was given to her, so she could look at it herself.

And then she brusquely folded it up again, pointing at Brunnhilde with one corner of it.

"This is a forgery," she said. "A fake. My son would not write such words. She has not seen him. Send her away. This man is a liar and so are his friends."

And yet, she wasn't tearing it up. She wasn't burning it.

Thor was convinced that she'd recognised the handwriting. She knew Loki had written it. Just didn't want to admit it.

Brunnhilde complained loudly as she was frog-marched out of the room. Thor hoped they were planning to just let her go, not imprison her or, worse, follow her in search of Loki.

And he was once again taken back to the bedroom, untied and left. Dinner arrived as usual. He read. Did what exercise he could. Blew out the candles and slept when he was tired.

Three more days passed before the Queen came to see him. Somehow, she seemed even more gaunt and ill, like she hadn't slept in all that time. The letter was in her hands, looking a little worse for wear. Like she'd be unable to put it down. Like she'd been clutching and twisting it all the while.

"Did he tell you why he left?" she croaked. Had she not been drinking much either?

Thor hesitated, sitting at the desk reading a book about shipping routes. Nothing of particular interest, but it passed the time. Should he tell her? Loki had written the letter, after all. He'd told her they knew each other.

What was the point in lying again?

"Yes. He did."

She sank onto the bed, her skirts filling with air at the motion, reminding him of his mother's old pincushion. Like her body was a hatpin, stuck in it.

"Why?" she whispered. "I don't understand. Why would he run away? Why didn't he talk to me?"

Thor couldn't bear to look at her. He didn't want to see how hurt she would be.

"He said he tried to explain. He didn't want to get married," he said softly, trying to be gentle. "He didn't want to marry Angerboda."

"Why not? She is a sweet, beautiful girl."

"She is," Thor agreed. "But he doesn't love her. And I doubt she loves him either."

He heard the scoff and finally dared to look. She didn't believe him? Was that it?

No. She already knew. And she thought her son a fool.

"Love?" she said. "It doesn't exist. Not romantic love. The love between family, that I know. That I understand. But romantic love? That's just something we tell children about. It's a story. I should have been more careful about his books, the nonsense he was filling his head with..."

Thor was horrified. Her own marriage must be so empty. She had never felt love for her husband, or been loved by him, and so she believed that no one ever loved. She didn't believe in affection even. She had found a young woman who was nice enough and inoffensive for her son. They would tolerate one another, with any luck. But that was no kind of marriage.

"Of course it exists," he said. "I've seen it. My parents loved one another. My friends love their spouses."

"Outward appearances are deceptive. It's easy enough to pretend. Have you ever felt it?"

Had he ever felt the want to be with someone? To share his life with them? To protect and care for them and allow them to care for him in return? Even when it was hard work, even when it was difficult?

The realisation came on him suddenly, and yet he felt deep down that he'd known for a while.

"Yes," he said. "I've felt it."


	32. Chapter 32

How long had he known, really? Thor wasn't sure. He'd always expected love to be sudden, a blinding flash of certainty. He hadn't known it could also sneak and creep and make a nest for itself like this.

Did Loki love him?

Well, he trusted him. He'd said he trusted him. And presumably he found him attractive. That's why he'd wanted to be intimate with him.

But they had established, hadn't they, that love was not necessary for sex. So maybe Loki did not feel the same. Maybe they were friends from his perspective, nothing other than that.

And maybe Thor was just a little disappointed that they had kissed and yet the curse remained. Maybe part of him had hoped that he would be the one to break it, to save Loki from it.

Typical, really. He liked being a caretaker. Maybe part of him had hoped to be the one who took care of Loki.

He'd wanted to have the power of true love's kiss. And where had such romanticism come into his life from?

"You loved someone and yet you remain unmarried?"

"It..." he sighed. "It wasn't the right time. For either of us."

That was maybe an odd way of wording it, but what else was he meant to say? He could hardly tell her that he'd suddenly realised he was in love with her son.

He was quite glad when she left him without much more ado. He needed to think.

Really it was amazing he'd taken so long to notice. He'd never felt quite like this before. Shades of it, perhaps. The intense friendship, the general feeling of well-being just being around Loki brought, the desire, the want to protect and so on... He'd felt them all in isolation to some extent or another, with various people, but not all together like this.

Maybe that was why. He'd not looked at the whole picture. He'd focussed on individual emotions and not his overall feelings.

Which meant he ought to come to terms with the fact it wasn't going to last. Nothing long-term could happen between them.

And he'd known that! He'd always known. This had always been the plan. Help Loki break the curse, and then go their separate ways. The idea of a prince and a goatherd being friends was ridiculous, let alone the idea of them being...

Well, lovers.

He stood up from the desk and flopped face down onto the bed. Somehow knowing it was inevitable made everything worse.

Right. Right. He could rationalise this.

He might well love Loki, but Loki did not love him. Or at least... No, he didn't. So he wouldn't want to explore anything more than friendship and maybe sex.

And wasn't that horribly ironic? All these years, he'd known you could have sex without love.

Little had he known how the idea of sex with unrequited love would horrify him.

Well... at least he could comfort himself with the knowledge that it would probably never happen. They probably wouldn't ever be alone again long enough. Loki would find his altruistic act and come hone and he'd be released to go pick up the herd and return to the mountains.

That was just how life was.

Two very miserable days later and the guards came for him in the morning, earlier than normal.

"What's happening?" he asked. "Am I having breakfast with her majesty?"

"No. An arrangement has been made."

They wouldn't tell him anything more than that, just made him follow. But rather than one of the other windowless rooms, he found himself blinded by sunlight, overwhelmed by the sweet scent of outside filling his nostrils, taking great lungfuls of air.

He wanted to touch the trees. The grass. He wanted to lie down and roll around in the dirt, just to remember what being out here was like.

And yet, he couldn't fully enjoy it. Something was wrong here. It had seemed like the Queen planned to keep him indefinitely as a prisoner, waiting for him to tell her where Loki was. Even though he'd probably run away somewhere else.

No, this was not right. He didn't trust it one bit. For this to be happening, something must have changed.

Not that he could ask. He was put back in the prison carriage by himself and driven back the way he'd come. Practically dumped back in the very same place they'd picked him up from.

"What now?" Thor asked the lead guard, getting a shrug in return.

"You're free to go."

Hmm... A likely story.

His fancy new clothes got him some odd looks as he made his way through town. He got the feeling that his arrest had been the height of gossip and talk amongst everyone.

How long had he been gone? He tried to think. He'd not been very good at counting the days, no ink to record them. A couple of weeks perhaps? Maybe three? A month?

He wasn't entirely convinced he wasn't being followed and so took a wandering route to the main market place.

Everyone else had packed up and moved on. The room was empty. No more pens. No more goats.

Shit.

He went to the inn next, the daughter eyeing him warily. He'd brought so much trouble to her door and now he appeared in such fine garments? No wonder she was nervous

"My animals?" he asked. "That's all I'm looking for. I shan't trouble you any further."

"Two women took them. The midwife and a stranger."

Right. Wanda and Brunnhilde probably. And he still wasn't totally sure he wanted to go to her house in case this was a trick to make him lead them to Loki, but it seemed he didn't have a choice.

He heard the goats from the end of the street. Bleating away. Not a care in the world, bless them. Some of the kids were probably quite big now.

When Wanda opened the door, her face told him all he needed to know. The possibility he hadn't wanted to entertain.

"He's gone, hasn't he?"


	33. Chapter 33

Brunnhilde hugged him so tightly that he thought she might break his ribs.

"We thought you'd be in there forever," she said. "Or killed or something."

"No, they kept me very well. I was bored, but I stayed in royal quarters. Loki's old rooms, I think."

Wanda looked ready to burst and he had to sit help her back to a threadbare couch. Moving around was evidently rather uncomfortable. And she still hadn't answered his question.

"We tried to stop him," she sighed. "But he was so scared about what was going to happen to you."

"What? What has he done?"

"He's gone home. In return for your freedom."

Inside, he'd known. He just hadn't wanted to think about it. Loki making such a sacrifice for him. He didn't want that, he wanted Loki to fight it, fight for his freedom.

They were a couple of fools, really. Each trying to save the other and both ending up miserable over it.

"I'm sorry," Wanda said. "This isn't what I'd planned. You were supposed to have broken the curse by now, but then they came for you and there was no time to explain..."

And now Thor was really confused. He sat down beside her, Brunnhilde making tea by the looks of it.

"When did you arrive?" he asked her. "Let's start from the beginning."

"Loki wrote to me right away to tell me what had happened. And I almost left right away too. Just stopped to pack and make sure the shop was all ready for Sif to run it alone."

"Why?"

She turned to look at him like he was the most ridiculous creature in the entire world.

"Because you're my friend. My dearest friend, apart from Sif of course. You'd do the same for me."

Yes, he would. Of course he would. No question. He was still grateful though.

Wanda took his hand unexpectedly, squeezing tightly.

"There's still time to save him, Thor," she said. "But I need you to listen to me carefully. And then I'm going to need your help."

She was pink, breathing hard, and Thor couldn't help but wonder if...

"Are you... Are you having the baby?" he asked.

A sigh. A heavy, heavy sigh.

"Yes. Waters broke about an hour ago and the contractions are still quite far apart but getting closer and closer. It will take some time, but not a lot. But that's why I need you to listen to me before I... Before I really have to concentrate on this."

Maybe it was her profession and calling helping, but she was one of the calmest he'd ever seen. Even women with multiple children were not so calm and they knew what they were doing, most of the time. He was probably more panicked than she was right now.

"I can help," he said. "My mother was a midwife, I can help. More than that, she was..."

It was so strange to say it out loud.

"She was a witch."

He could feel Brunnhilde looking at him in surprise. She hadn't known. No one had known. And, of course, she'd had bad experiences with witches, but Frigga had always been kind to her.

Wanda sighed a smile.

"I thought so. She's the one who cast the spell, trying to protect you."

Another contraction, her eyes closing tightly, gripping the arm of the couch.

"Listen," she said. "I should have just told you at the time, but I tried to help you break the curse. I should have just told you..."

Thor shook his head.

"But you said Loki had to commit a perfectly selfless act."

"And that would work, but it's nearly impossible to achieve. Love's first kiss would work as well. It's like... Like a key for all doors."

He tried to hide how his heart ached, the knowledge he carried. It wasn't him. He wasn't someone Loki loved, not like that.

"We... We kissed after we left you that night. And it didn't work. He woke up as a goat just the same. We didn't... He doesn't love me."

She was becoming frustrated, trying to help him understand.

"Of course he loves you! I saw it, I felt it, in both of you. But you were both too scared, too worried to do anything about it."

She gasped and groaned, gritting her teeth.

"Then why didn't it work? We kissed, why didn't it...?"

A look through bleary eyes, an apology almost.

"The lip salve I gave him," she said, laboured breath impeding her sentence. "It was... It lowered his fear. It made him brave enough to make the first move. But it means those kisses were aided by magic. They weren't completely true."

Thor felt a horrible wave of emotion. Fear, mainly, and a lot of guilt. Loki hadn't really...

"He didn't really want it," he said. "It would be like if he was drunk..."

"No," she said quickly. "Nothing like that. It just took away his fear of making his wants known a little. It did not affect his decisions or thoughts or even his inhibitions. But I had interrupted an organic process, sped up proceedings, so technically it was not a kiss of true love."

"Then how was it supposed to help?"

Her voice had risen to a shout.

"You were supposed to kiss him the next morning! You were meant to kiss again when all the magic had worn off but having realised you loved each other and break the curse. Happily ever after, off into the sunset. It's not my fault that you decided to sleep in!"

They'd been so close. So very, very close. If he'd only woken up ten minutes earlier...

Wanda let out a long, pained moan. Right. Deal with one thing at a time, Thor.

He laid his coat and new fancy shirt aside, getting confused looks from Brunnhilde, but, well, he wanted to be well-dressed next time he saw Loki and having bloodstains on his outfit wouldn't help.

Besides, it meant he didn't have to roll up his sleeves.

"Brunnhilde," he said gently. "Boil some more water. We're going to need it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The birth won't be graphic, by the way. Just in case anyone's concerned.


	34. Chapter 34

Twins... Well, it did explain why she'd been quite so big for so long.

Poor Brunnhilde was an only child and, for all her travels, had never actually been in the room for a birth before. Her eyes were enormous as she helped him, boiling water, holding Wanda's hand, trying her best to keep her calm.

Thor didn't want to tell her that he'd felt Wanda working magic, easing her pain back from the edge of agony when she could manage it. He'd seen worse. Though it had taken hours.

Two boys, one dark-haired like his mother, the other with a shock of white. And good, healthy lungs on the pair of them.

"Who is the father?" Brunnhilde asked. "Unless... Unless you can't say."

Wanda sighed happily, evidently exhausted.

"It's complicated," she said. "My husband is... not exactly of this world. He's one of the fair folk, if you understand."

Thor looked to Brunnhilde for help. She had been places and knew about this sort of thing after all. But she wasn't looking at him. She seemed to understand though.

"How often do you get to see him?"

"In visions, all the time. In person... only when the moon is blue and waning and an arch is formed in the sky."

"Not often, then," Thor said.

The world was full of strange things.

Didn't seem like he'd be a particularly hands-on parent, though.

"Are you going to be alright?" he asked on that point. "With two babies suddenly? One is work enough."

"Brunnhilde will help me get organised. You need to go rescue your prince. They won't have been able to organise a royal wedding in just a night, after all."

"How? It will take me days to walk."

Everyone in the room, including the babies, seemed to give him a slightly exasperated look.

"As you know, I'm about as unromantic as they come," Brunnhilde said. "But you're a man in love. Use your head and follow your heart."

"But..."

"Rent a horse! Or borrow one. Buy one, even - those clothes are fancy, you could give them the shirt and ride out in your coat. Besides, you're about to free the prince of Erfundorf from a curse, I'm sure you'll manage to pay it back."

She was making a lot of sense, though it was already nearly nightfall. He'd have to ride fast to get there before Loki changed back, especially as he'd been so stressed. Much as he loved him, the idea of kissing a goat on the lips did not exactly appeal.

"What if it doesn't work?" he asked, pulling the coat on and doing up the buttons, pretending his wasn't concerned by just how much chest he had on show.

"It will work," Brunnhilde said, taking his hands and squeezing them. "He loves you. I got to meet him properly and I could tell. Go on. We'll be waiting to hear all about it."

His heart swelled at knowing he had such good friends, that both of them had faith in Loki's feelings, his fear being replaced by excitement. He would do it. He would save Loki from the curse, from the unwanted marriage, from the dark rooms. And then afterwards they'd...

Well, they could decide that together.

Right now, he had to bid the ladies goodbye, and hope his notoriety was not so bad that no one would rent him a horse.

As it was, he rather felt it helped. He'd provided a deal of entertainment. And his fine linen shirt would make an excellent Sunday best for any gentleman.

He galloped out of town just as the sun dipped below the horizon.

If only he had more experience with horses and their stamina...

The landscape was strange at night, but not unfriendly, his eyes growing used to the darkness. The tiredness would hit him eventually probably, but there was no time to sleep now.

The horse snorted and chose its own pace but seemed to sense his urgency, seldom slowing below a trot as they followed the road and navigated by the stars, riding through forests full of rustles and squeaks, sneaking through sleeping villages, occasionally spotting a lone house on a hillside much like his own with a candle still lit.

Thor grinned against the chill wind and let his love warm him.

Stay strong, Loki. I'm on my way.


	35. Chapter 35

It had taken the carriage around eight hours to make the journey to Erfundorf, though of course they had hardly been rushing

Thor found himself moving through the main city gates sooner than he'd expected, the lights of it like a beacon on the landscape. No stabling available, probably. Most people would still be very sensibly asleep.

He trotted his horse through the streets towards the palace. What should he do now? Storm the door? Demand an audience with the royal family? Or should he be more sneaky?

Then again, it wasn't like Loki had any windows for him to throw pebbles at...

No, a direct approach would be best. He did his best to look nonchalant, easing his horse towards the palace walls and the main entrance, seeming to wake up the two guards posted there.

"Halt?" one of them tried.

Thor dismounted, patting his steed vaguely on the neck.

"I have urgent business with the royal family."

He had no weapons and did his best not to look dangerous, as far as a man clearly wearing a coat with no shirt and out in the middle of the night could look not dangerous.

The guards shared a confused look, like they weren't sure what to do. Was this above their level?

Maybe he could use that to his advantage. Maybe they didn't know yet that Loki was back.

"I have news about the whereabouts of the missing prince."

Just as he suspected. They didn't know yet. They were going to have to get someone else.

"Wait here."

He was left with the larger of the two guards while the other went to fetch a higher up. The man was decidedly nervous, clutching his halberd tightly, as though Thor might suddenly explode with violence. He tried giving him a friendly smile but it didn't seem to help.

They'd had to wake up his old friend, the head guard who had captured him and who had sometimes been the one who took him to the Queen's presence and back. Her favourite, perhaps. At the very least, a trusted man.

And a man clearly wondering whether his pay was sufficient for his trouble by the looks of him, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose when he spotted Thor.

"We sent you away for a reason," he said, his mild tone not quite covering his exasperation. "I'd have thought you'd be grateful."

"I need to see the Queen," Thor said. "I've remembered something about the goat."

He watched as the head guard's eyes widened, furious that he'd spoken so openly about the curse, the other two just looking confused.

"Tell no one you saw this man," he said, jerking his head for Thor to follow him.

"I would throw you directly into the dungeons if Prince Loki had not given strict instructions on what to do if you were so much as sighted in the vicinity."

"What did he say ought to be done with me?"

"That you should be kept comfortable until you came to your senses. Though quite what sense he thinks you have, I'm sure I have no idea."

Thor chuckled. No doubt Loki would be saying something much the same. Still, if he knew what Thor knew... That they'd been so close, that it would take only one kiss...

He was taken to some kind of guest room, a little dusty but otherwise inoffensive. It was clearly unused, not looked into. No one would stumble across him by mistake in here. Not even maids probably.

"So, when can I see him?"

A scoff, almost a laugh.

"See him? No, no. You will remain here until you ask to leave, whereupon we will return you to where we found you. Again."

No. No, no... He had to see Loki. That was the whole point.

"You're... You're not even going to tell him I'm here, are you?"

"No, I'm not. And this wing is only used when we have official visitors, designed for privacy and discretion. Shout all you want, no one will hear you. Goodnight."

He locked the door. The heavy, solid wood door. The door Thor knew he would exhaust or injure himself long before breaking down.

Hmm...

Alright, so he needed a new plan.

What did he know about palaces? Well, they were large. They had many rooms.

Weren't there secret passages too? Servant stairs and so on? Hidden doors?

He must have gone round the room more than ten times knocking on the walls trying to find hollows and feeling for cracks to no avail. And he was so tired...

Sleep now. Continue in the morning. When he was refreshed.

His stomach rolled and he couldn't tell if it was hunger or worry or both.

Probably both.


	36. Chapter 36

Thor was singing as he was brought breakfast and a fresh shirt the next morning. He'd opened the window wide since there was one. Maybe someone could hear him after all.

"It will do you no good," the guard said. "You're far from all the occupied areas of the palace. Besides, the Queen is already talking about auditioning choirs for the wedding. Anyone who hears will just assume you are practicing. And that you have no chance of being chosen."

His whole stomach sank. The wedding? No! This wasn't right. Neither Loki nor Angerboda wanted to be married.

"The curse isn't broken, then?" he asked. After all, if this self-sacrifice had counted as a selfless act, surely they wouldn't be pushing him to be wed so soon...

"Not yet. His majesty is spending time with his betrothed."

An idea began to form in Thor's mind. An idea about the only times Loki had been allowed outside the windowless rooms, when he took walks in the garden. Presumably with Angerboda and his mother.

How could he make that happen? Or find out when they took their walk?

"Have they chosen their flowers yet?" he asked. "Prince Loki is quite the connoisseur of plants. I'm sure he'd be grateful for the opportunity to be involved."

Narrowed eyes. Distrust. Thor shrugged.

"I just want him to be as happy as possible. And I'm sure if would put you in the Queen's good books if you were able to cheer him a little."

The guard folded his arms, though he was clearly thinking about it.

"Are you ready to go home?" he asked.

"Not yet," Thor said.

He ate his breakfast - cooked, all sausages and eggs, filling and hearty - and tried to refine his plan. They would be having breakfast now too, Loki and his mother, maybe Angerboda too. After that... maybe they'd be making other decisions about the wedding. Fabrics and so on. If he'd set the idea well, the guard would make a suggestion to the Queen about flowers...

Maybe after lunch, then?

They'd bring him food. The perfect opportunity to ask. Pretend to be lovelorn but coming to terms with it.

He tried to orientate himself. It was the morning, the sun in the east. So he faced south-west from this window. He'd come from the west, that was where the main gate faced. So an internal garden, far from prying eyes would be...

Almost directly behind him? Towards the centre of the palace?

No wonder no one could hear him.

He closed the window, a real plan brewing.

Waiting was the worst thing. At least Loki's rooms had had books in them. Here there was nothing to serve as distraction. They were trying to bore him into submission.

Still, he had hope now. One day? He could do this. He could put up with terrible tortures for Loki's sake.

He must have counted all the floor boards and wall panels and tassels on the tapestries several times over before the guard reappeared with lunch. At least he looked suitably dejected. Miserable. Soon to be broken.

The man looked down on him where he was sitting on the floor, sighing in pity, like he was seeing a child worn out after a tantrum.

"You've stopped singing," he said.

"No one can hear me."

A grim nod.

"You were right about the Prince," he said. "Wagging his tail at the merest suggestion of going outside. He'll enjoy spending a little time among the hedges this afternoon."

Thor carefully didn't react, even as inside he was crowing. He hadn't even had to ask. The man had volunteered the information he wanted.

"Nothing to say?"

A shrug. Not really.

"Ready to go home?"

"I think I shall sleep on this fine bed for the afternoon. I don't know when I shall next have the chance to enjoy such luxury."

That seemed to pass muster. The guard gave him a smug smile and took away his breakfast things. Thor picked at the bread he'd been brought, like he couldn't summon up enthusiasm for it. Like he was broken. Defeated.

The lock clicked and he waited until the man's footsteps had completely died away before eating quickly. Let's see - there would be lunch first and then the Queen would want to change into an outdoor gown. How long would all that take? Half an hour? Forty-five minutes?

He couldn't start early, after all. That would give the game away.

Judging time was difficult. He watched the shadows move. They'd want to avoid the heat of the day probably...

It was a risk. But one he had to take.

He thought about his mother, about the charm she had given him. Maybe she'd given him a little luck with it too. The luck that had made Loki find him. The luck that had taken them to Wanda.

He had to hope it was still working as he opened the window and looked out at the walls all around the outer perimeter of the palace. Nice, smooth stone.

No one could hear him singing from here. His voice just went upwards, dying on the wind.

But he knew a way to communicate that could stretch across valleys. That could cross mountains. That could carry for miles if it had something to bounce off.

Something like a wall.

He took a deep breath, filling his lungs...

And yodelled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You have no idea how excited I was when I realised yodelling could be the key. Thrilled. It looks so deliberate! It almost creates the illusion that I know what I'm doing.
> 
> (Also Loki will be in the next chapter, honest.)


	37. Chapter 37

It flowed out of his throat, like it had a life of its own, like a living creature he was conjuring out of thin air. He poured his feelings into it, all the love and hope and fears he was experiencing.

He yodelled patterns he'd learned as a young boy, ones he'd developed as a man, even improvised some completely new ones just for the occasion.

Every time he took a breath, he heard his own voice echoing. They'd be hearing him far beyond the palace. The surrounding city would hear, maybe even a village or two beyond.

Surely anyone outside would hear that. The sound of a goatherd in love.

He didn't hear the door open behind him until it was too late. The guard pulled him back from the window, a hand over his mouth, wrestling him to the floor.

But he could hear it. A sound as dear to him as any other in the world.

A goat's bleat.

He'd heard. Loki knew he was here.

Good luck keeping them apart now...

"I'm done," he said, flattening his arms against the ground. "I'm finished."

"Damn right, you are. I ought to have you whipped."

"I doubt Prince Loki would like that."

It was a winning hand and he knew it. Loki would demand to see him and then he would break the curse and save them all.

No pressure.

The sound of hoof beats was a surprise. He hadn't expected Loki to come running right away. He expected to wait until he was human before seeing him again.

But no. Here he was, all goaty and furious, galloping into the room after kicking the door open, Angerboda following after him.

Furious was the right word. Goat or not, he was practically quivering with rage. He'd tried to protect him from exactly this situation, had returned to protect his love. No wonder he was cross.

"I know," Thor said. "I know, you're angry with me and I'm an idiot."

"Beh..."

"A _complete_ idiot. But I know how to break the curse."

Was it possible for a goat to look skeptical? Loki was certainly having a good go at it.

"You came back here in return for my safety," Thor said. "To rescue me. And maybe you thought that was the unselfish act. Sacrificing your happiness. But, of course, you did it to save me, to have the comfort of knowing that I was safe. It didn't count."

Tapping his hoof on the floor. Get to the point, Thor.

"But I love you," he said. "Truly. And I think you love me too."

He could see the sadness in Loki's eyes despite those strange pupils. Yes, that might be so, but they had already kissed and nothing had happened. He couldn't explain about Wanda's interference just yet, but he had to try...

"Prince Loki," he said very seriously. "When you turn back, please let me try. Please."

Loki looked at him balefully.

"One baa for yes?"

A sigh, more like a snort.

"Beh."

Not the most enthusiastic response, but, well...

Angerboda clapped her hands together once, decisively.

"I suppose you ought to join us for dinner," she said brightly.

Was that mischief in her eyes? Maybe. Maybe she was enjoying the idea of causing a bit of chaos. Of seeing the Queen's reaction.

Maybe she hoped to get out of the marriage...

Thor didn't mind what her motives were. She was an ally, at least for the moment. She was getting him out if this infernal room and keeping him with Loki.

Not that the Queen was happy with that when she finally caught up. Her frailty had caused her some trouble in moving quickly, it seemed, out if breath by the time she arrived, her face the very picture of outrage.

"I won't allow it," she said. "This man is a kidnapper and a liar and the son of a known witch to boot."

"Loki wanted to stay with him," Angerboda said calmly. "Why don't we let him attempt to break the curse and if he can't, then he can leave with dignity?"

Thor wanted nothing more than to touch Loki, a friendly touch, a little reassurance that he knew what he was doing. As it was, he could only look at those strange lips on that wrong jaw and how they were trembling uncertainly.

"I will come back to this room after we dine" he said. "After Prince Loki has returned to human form and I have made my attempt. And then in the morning, you can tell me if I was successful or not."

She still didn't look sure, but Loki was keeping close to him, that stubborn look about him.

Perhaps he thought Thor was merely finding a way to kiss him goodbye.

He shouldn't have thought that. Panic rolled through him. What if it didn't work? What if this gamble didn't pay off? What if this really was goodbye?

He'd have to make it really count. Make it really special.

His personal guard refused to leave his side, grumbling all the way round to the windowless rooms and their dozens of candles and standing at a grumpy attention while Angerboda carried on with her normal routine, reading out loud from history books and playing pretty tunes on a sort of lute.

And needled the Queen terribly by asking Thor to teach her folk songs.

He did his best to keep away from the bawdier ones he knew.

It wouldn't do to spoil his chances of convincing her of the existence of true love now, after all.


	38. Chapter 38

Thor had half expected them to wait for Loki to change before eating. He always had. He liked his conversation over a meal. But then again, the sight of him sitting with all four legs up on his chair was adorable. So stately!

The Queen sat to Loki's left in her usual seat, Angerboda to his right. Thor was amazed he wasn't sent to the opposite end of the long table, away from discussions.

No cutlery, he realised. They were to drink their soup from the bowl and eat with their hands. He hadn't expected such refined ladies to behave in such a manner, but then again, it helped Loki feel less different, perhaps.

Thor had a sudden fear that he'd been very insensitive in letting Loki eat at floor level when he was a goat and providing knives and forks otherwise. Then again, his spindly chairs would not have been ideal for a goat to sit on.

Maybe it wasn't really an issue at all. Maybe Loki didn't even think about it that much.

Well, Thor was no stranger to such gastronomic techniques, even if he was on his best behaviour.

The nerves were really getting to him now. What if it didn't work? What if Wanda was wrong? About the magic, about the extent of their feelings...

There was no room for doubt. He had to believe. He did believe.

He loved Loki and Loki loved him.

They had just begun dessert - a rare treat for Thor, especially as it was a sort of set milk pudding rather than his more familiar fruit pie - when Loki skipped off behind a large panel, like an oversized fire screen.

There was no mistaking that sigh. He'd come back to himself, faint sounds of fabric rustling as he got dressed.

And there was no mistaking the look of utter fury on his face as he reemerged ready to give Thor a piece of his mind. Several pieces maybe.

"You shouldn't be here, Thor," he said. "I only came back so you would go free."

It was hard to ignore the hurt on the Queen's face. He'd have to make this quick and convincing.

"I know. I know, I accept that, but I have to at least try to break the curse. I really think I know how."

A growl, still with a hint of a bleat to it.

"Fine. Tell me your grand scheme."

Thor could feel his cheeks heating, aware he was going to say some private, embarrassing things now in circumstances that weren't exactly ideal. Still, needs must.

He stood, thinking to go to him, only to notice the guards drawing their weapons. Right, right... No sudden movements.

He kept his hands clearly visible, speaking as he walked.

"You left because you didn't want to get married," he said. "And your mother believes true love is faithful and that alone. Forsaking all others. But I don't think true love means only first love, or even lone love necessarily, but love that is heartfelt and real. Love that you're willing to work for. To nurture. Because it's worth it. That's what true love is, I think. And I... I love you. In that way."

Loki's eyes seemed very large, his lips parted. His rich clothes were beautiful, embroidered and shiny, perfectly tailored. And yet Thor couldn't say this was the most beautiful he'd ever seen him.

The most beautiful had been just his face on that last night they spent together, so open and honest, completely in the moment with him. Safe and full of hope and wonderful.

Thor stepped closer and cupped Loki's face in both hands, feeling the heat of his skin before he leant in.

They had done this before, but it hadn't felt quite like this. There was a weight here. A deeper meaning. He felt as Loki kissed him back, sure and definite, not out of fear or desperation but as a physical representation of their feelings.

When they broke apart, Thor felt like his heart was singing. Soaring. Something. Something he'd never felt and had never expected to.

"Do you feel any different?" the Queen asked.

Loki had been clutching at his shoulders but almost pushed him away reflexively, forced rudely back into the room and reality.

"I don't know," he said, voice slightly strained. "Maybe? I'm not sure."

"Then we shall wait until the morning and find out. I think it is time for Mr Odinson to retire."

It was an order rather than a request. Thor managed to give Loki's hand a brief squeeze before he was led away, taken back to the guest room he'd occupied the night before.

This was different though. Now he didn't just have hope, he was almost certain.

Loki hadn't been able to feel it, but he had. A distinctive rush, like jumping into water.

He was sure of it.

He'd felt the spell leave.


	39. Chapter 39

Thor dreamt of kisses. Soft and sweet. Gentle.

It took a while to realise that he was not, in fact, fully asleep. These were real kisses.

He couldn't see very well in the darkness, but he knew it was Loki. The taste of him, the slight brushing of his hair against his skin. He'd slipped into bed beside him.

Well... This was unexpected, but not unwelcome.

"How'd you get out?" Thor asked sleepily.

Loki sighed and cuddled close, resting his head on Thor's shoulder.

"They never did figure out how I escaped in the first place," he said. "I learned to pick the locks. It's not hard when you know how. I have to be back in bed by dawn, but I... I wanted to see you. Alone."

"Oh, really?" Thor said, running a hand down his back.

"Yes. I wanted to make sure you definitely know that I think you're a complete fool."

Laughter bubbled out of Thor's throat, still a little scratchy from sleep.

"I mean it," Loki insisted. "I came back here so you would go free. No benefit to myself. And it still didn't work."

"Because you wanted me safe. That was the benefit. If I'd been your worst enemy, maybe it would have. But the kiss has worked. I'm certain of it."

Loki sighed, clearly unsure.

"It didn't work before," he said.

"That was different."

He was going to explain all about it, about Wanda's well-meaning interference, about how all they had to do was trust and it would be so, but Loki laid a finger on his lips before he could speak.

"This might be my last chance to spend the night with you," he whispered. "Curse or no curse. And I'm not saying that because I doubt that you love me, just that maybe the spell wants more. I don't know. All I know is that I want to... go further than before. With someone I love."

Ah. Huh. Well...

"How far?"

"As far as possible. I've read about it now. I want to be as close as we can be, as intimate, as connected as we can be."

Thor wondered if the Queen knew what a romantic her son was.

"There are some... practical difficulties with that. Do you have any oil for one?"

Even in the faint moonlight - Loki must have opened the drapes - and glow from the city, he could see him smile, a little embarrassed.

"Once I understood what was involved, I've been... practising by myself. Using my fingers."

Thor stared at him while uncomfortably aware that he was suddenly rather aroused. He very much wanted to find out more about this practising and whether Loki had attempted to prepare himself this night too...

But they shouldn't rush into this.

He was almost surprised at himself. He'd never worried about things like rushing before.

Then again, he'd never felt like this before either.

"Are you sure about this?"

"No. But I trust you."

Was that enough?

He hesitated too long, Loki sighing, so close that he felt the heat of his breath.

"That's not what I mean. I mean that... I'm nervous, but I know you'll be gentle. I know you'll take care of me. And I know that I want this."

Thor thought for a moment. What would be the best way to go about this?

He pulled Loki close, kissing him gently, running his hands over his back and down to his legs, staying on the outside of his clothes at first and then underneath, feeling the way his muscles moved as he arched towards him.

Straying further down, he dared to finally touch beneath his trousers, finding them loose, only pulled on for propriety in case he'd been caught sneaking through the palace, his thighs slick.

"What did you use?" Thor asked as Loki gasped against his mouth.

"I have a kind of cream for dry skin. It's that. I think it's mainly lard."

It was certainly slippery enough by the feel of it. Thor tried to keep his breathing steady, not to give away how excited and nervous he was, but to seem calm as he let his fingers try pushing inside...

Loki gripped his shoulders tight, a little sound slipping out of him. A good sound?

"Alright?"

"Yes. It's just... Different angle, that's all."

Yes, it would feel strange. He remembered the difference between touching himself and being touched by someone else so clearly.

"Were you on your back?"

"Mm."

"Right, then..."

He lay Loki down despite his mumbled protests, words which died on his lips as Thor got them both undressed as quickly as possible.

It felt different. It felt new. Which was ridiculous, really. Still, as he watched Loki's face as he reached between his legs, he felt terribly young and inexperienced.

This was better though. He could feel the heat of Loki's body, the tight clenching, see the moment when it went from strange to pleasurable.

He could happily have stayed like this all night, gently moving his wrist, watching Loki react with moans and bitten lips, but it was not to be. Loki had other ideas.

"Do it. I'm ready."

"Like this or...?"

His eyes had fluttered closed but opened again, a little frown just visible.

"I didn't know there were other ways."

"No, I meant... Do you want to be lying down like this? I thought maybe you could sit astride me. It would give you more control for your first time."

He might have known that the same part of Loki that had been excited to see him in a collar would like this idea too, letting out a breath of pure want that had Thor chuckling as he flopped onto his back.

"Go slow," he said. "Don't rush."

Of course, Loki swung a leg over him immediately, knocking the wind out of him, and looking suitably determined as he reached back to grasp Thor's cock.


	40. Chapter 40

"Ah!"

"Careful!"

"I'm being careful, it's just..."

Thor had his hands on Loki's waist, trying his best to support his weight and not let him just slam downwards, wary of hurting him - or letting the evidence of this little tryst be too obvious come the morning.

Slow, gentle, a careful lowering.

Loki let out a satisfied sigh as he was finally allowed to support himself, his eyes closed and head thrown back. Beautiful.

Though it was really hard for Thor to keep his eyes open to look at him what with the sensations rushing through his body. Even without moving, he could feel the tightness, the heat and the feeling of being as close as they could possibly be.

At least so he thought until Loki leaned down to kiss him.

This was as close as possible. Loki's thighs tight around him, his hands on his chest, lips to his...

He didn't want him to sit up again, even as he rolled his hips and gasped at the sensation, testing his body just a little.

"Good?" Thor asked.

"Mm... Strange. But I think I just need to..."

He leant back slightly, experimenting, and Thor was only too happy to watch him, to help him try to find just the right angle. Evidently enjoying himself, instinctive movements. The most natural being Thor had ever seen.

"Are you sure you've never done this before?"

"Hmm?"

"Just... Mm, you're pretty good at it."

Loki grinned down at him, eyes hooded and warm.

"It's easy to be good at something with the right... Ah, the right tools."

Thor opened his mouth to protest, jokingly, at such a demotion but then Loki moved just so, a little faster, and any ability to speak sense got lost on the way from his brain.

Could they stay like this forever? He wished they could. Safe together, far away from curses and marriages and monarchy. Even far away from goats if necessary.

His hands found their way to Loki's hips, helping his motions but still letting him set the pace, aware of his cock just gently brushing against his stomach. One touch was enough to set him moaning, his movement stuttering. So open with what he was feeling. No pretence, no hiding.

Thor loved him so much as he wrapped his hand around his cock properly, stroking gently and then with more purpose, trying to please him before the combination of sensations and emotion overpowered him.

He could feel it now, deep inside, a spring growing tighter and tighter, more and more in need of release. But he was a proud man. He was going to make Loki spill first if it killed him.

And if he kept crying out like that, it just might.

Stroking in earnest, moving his hips upwards to add to Loki's strength, he tried every trick he knew, harder and faster until Loki's whole body shook, his muscles tense and shuddering as he came all over Thor's stomach, gasping for air like he'd been holding his breath.

Not that Thor was far behind. It was amazing he'd lasted so long, if he was honest.

And he only realised a second too late that he ought to have warned him, mumbling an apology.

"No," Loki said, breathless. "No, I wanted it inside. I want to feel it tomorrow, so I know I didn't just dream it."

He flopped sideways and let Thor hold him, pressing kisses to his hair and face, unwilling to let him go back to his own bed yet.

"That was a good last night," Loki murmured.

"It's not the last. And next time, I want to be on top."

Loki laughed, almost like a purr.

"Careful. I might hold you to that."

"I'm counting on it."

A few more warm kisses and Loki slipped away, leaving Thor to open the window in an effort to air out the room, gazing up at the twinkling stars above him.

If the kiss hadn't been enough, surely the curse would have been satisfied by that, he thought.

He cuddled a pillow and did his best not to worry about the morning.


	41. Chapter 41

Thor woke to birdsong. The window still open. A cool summer's breeze.

What time was it? Was it already past the time Loki would normally change? He couldn't tell.

He stretched lazily, his skin flaky with Loki's spend from the night before. A nice reminder, but one he should probably make some effort to clean off before seeing anyone else.

And get dressed. Didn't want to give some poor maid or guard a shock, after all.

What was taking them so long? He'd got out of bed, given himself a cursory wash, gotten dressed and there still didn't seem to be breakfast or anything else coming.

And Loki hadn't locked the door after him, had he?

Apparently not. At a lost for what else to do, Thor left the room, following his feet back towards the windowless suite. He got a few odd looks, wandering through the palace, but no one stopped him until he arrived at the doors to the private rooms and found two junior guards blocking his way.

"I'm, erm... I'm a guest?" he tried. "The Queen's man knows me."

They looked at him with complete distrust, but one of them knocked a distinctive rhythm on the door.

Thor smiled at them as the lock clicked and the familiar head of his poor guard friend emerged, evidently surprised to see him.

"How the hell did you get out?"

"The door was unlocked," he said, truthfully, but adding no further details. "I just wondered how things were... coming along. And what the breakfast situation was."

Flared nostrils, frowning, a wave of a hand that was more of a flap.

"Go back to your room. I'll have food brought to you."

As if he was going to make it that easy.

"Nah, I'll just sit in. Save the walk."

A scoff, but Thor wondered if there wasn't a degree of grudging respect there as well. He was troublesome, but he wasn't dangerous.

Or maybe that was something else in the man's eyes. Some... excitement, perhaps.

"It's worked," Thor said. "Hasn't it?"

He didn't need confirmation. He just needed to see Loki. To see for himself. He took a step forward but got a firm hand in his chest.

"Wait here."

The door was unceremoniously closed in his face. There was silence for a while and then he could hear voices. A low one, Loki's if he was any judge, and then a higher one. The Queen?

And they were having quite the row...

The door opened, Loki only barely decent in a robe. What was going on here?

The guards were certainly well trained. They didn't so much as glance backwards as Loki grabbed him by the hand and pulled him through the doors.

"You're not a goat," Thor said, feeling ridiculous just saying it.

A grin, a wide grin. Pure joy all over his face.

"I'm not a goat."

His heart swelled, thrilled and proud. He'd done it - no, _they'd_ done it, their love. It had grown between them slowly, almost invisibly, but now it was like it had always been there.

And now...

His heart sank like a boat crashing on rocks.

Now what? Now Loki was an uncursed prince and he was just a lowly goatherd. And a man, to boot. It wasn't like they could marry.

He heard the Queen tut at them.

"Loki, this is improper. You are déshabillé."

Loki groaned, a groan Thor knew well from personal experience, though he hadn't made such a sound since he was about seventeen years old.

"Oh, Mother, please! We lived together. He's seen it all before."

She put her hands on her hips and Thor was struck by the familiarity again. How often had he seen his mother like that? Or any of the mothers of the town as they chastised their infants?

A near universal gesture, it seemed.

"I want him here," Loki said stubbornly. "Always. He is the one who broke the curse. He ought to be here."

Thor had the strange experience of being embarrassed and smug at the same time as Loki took him through to the dining room, the table covered with all manner of foods, far too much for two or even three people to eat.

And at the head of the table, in Loki's usual seat, was a man. Tall, grey, hard-faced and broad-shouldered.

The King of Erfundorf. And Thor had the crown prince holding his arm and dressed in nothing but a thin robe.

Right.

Right.

This was fine.


	42. Chapter 42

Thor did not like to think of himself as easily intimidated. He'd faced down guards and violent drunks and the angriest of goats, but he couldn't deny the sense of unease he felt looking at Loki's father, the cool stare of those eyes that were so like his son's and yet so completely different too.

He couldn't quite figure out what it was as Loki steered him to a chair and then sat down next to him.

"Father, this is Thor. He helped break my curse."

"He will be well compensated for his trouble."

Oh, that felt bad. That felt like dismissal. Loki let out a little half laugh, like he wasn't sure what was happening, or was pretending it was a joke.

"No," he said. "No, he's going to stay here with me. I love him."

The King grunted, slicing the top from a boiled egg.

"I fail to see what that has to do with anything. You are betrothed to a young woman of good breeding. If this reprieve from your condition holds, we shall announce your return and engagement and have a winter wedding. It has been decided."

"But... But I don't want to marry Angerboda," Loki said.

Thor feared his words would fall unheeded.

"Want doesn't come into it, my boy. And nor does love for that matter. You think your mother and I wanted to be married? This is duty, nothing more."

"And Thor?"

"May return to whatever he did before. I believe as a shepherd."

"A goatherd," Thor said.

"Hm. Makes sense."

Loki set his jaw, shaking his head.

"No. I won't be without him. He can be my... My valet or butler. My right-hand man."

A long, hard stare as the King gestured with his knife.

"People will know," he said. "There will be talk."

"So what? People talk about your affairs. Everyone knows about them."

"It is normal for a king to take mistresses."

"Exactly. It's just the same."

"No... It is not normal for a king to be openly in love with another man. But love can pass. You will get over this with time."

This was what Thor had expected. They couldn't be together, not like this. He'd known it all along.

Besides, he wasn't sure if he wanted to live as a servant in the palace, however freely. Yes, he wanted to be with Loki, but so secretly? So restricted? Looked down on as a subordinate? He wasn't sure about that.

And he definitely didn't want to put Angerboda through the same pain Loki's mother had been through. The hurt, the loneliness. No one deserved that, especially not someone who'd done nothing wrong. She hadn't asked for this.

"Maybe I don't want to be king, then," Loki said quietly.

The silence that followed was deafening. The shock, the disbelief. And that made Loki bold, it seemed.

"You were ashamed of me. Of my curse. You locked me up here and told me it was for my own good. But I've been out there now, out in the world beyond these walls. And, yes, it was hard and it was dirty and smelly and the food left a lot to be desired if I'm honest but... But I was free. I could be myself, not some forced, curated version, not looking over my shoulder all the time at which ambitious duke is trying to usurp me. I'm the missing prince - just let me stay missing."

"And the bloodline?"

Loki threw his hands up, exasperated.

"Pick your favourite illegitimate child and give it to them. I abdicate. Give it to a child you're actually proud of."

Thor couldn't help but feel guilty, turning to him urgently.

"I can't let you do this for me," he said. "Think it over first."

A long look, big eyes.

"I was cursed for being selfish," he said. "And maybe I haven't changed because I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it for myself. Because I don't want to be without you and I can't bear to go back to a cage, no matter how gilded."

There was a strange sound from the opposite side of the table. A sniff.

And Thor realised with an ache in his heart that the Queen was weeping.

"You're all I have, Loki," she said, voice shaking. "My whole life... All I've done for you..."

"You locked me up. You hid me away."

Thor cleared his throat gently.

"You want him safe and happy," he said gently. "Why trap him in a loveless marriage? Why trap him in the same cycle? It's not what he wants."

"So he should go with you and... And raise goats?"

She said it with such disgust that Thor was slightly offended, but he was trying to soften the blow a little. He could ignore it.

"I will make him happy to the best of my ability. Isn't that what parents want? For their children to be happy?"

"I want him to be safe and secure and prosperous."

"And miserable?" Loki asked.

She sighed, putting her head in her hands. And as much as he wanted to sweep Loki out of here and back home, Thor didn't feel he could do it if he knew he'd left a woman heart-broken.

He needed to prove himself to her.

"How about we get some fresh air?" he suggested. "Clear our heads a little?"

After all, nature always helped calm him down when his emotions were high.

Maybe it would help.


	43. Chapter 43

Loki refused to let Thor out of his sight, taking him through to his bedroom as he dressed, murmuring all the while about how he wouldn't change his mind no matter what.

"I can't remember the last time I went into the garden as a human," he said, buttoning a shirt that left little to the imagination.

"Will you miss it?" Thor asked.

"The curse? No."

"Just it was part of you for so long. It will take some getting used to it not being there."

"I suppose. But I won't miss the pain. I won't miss having it control my life. I won't miss not being able to make myself understood most of the time."

Something else had been bothering Thor too, though.

"And are you sure you want to leave all this?"

"What? The dark rooms and being a pawn in history and only important to my parents as a legacy rather than for my thoughts?"

"But the comfort..."

"What's comfort worth if you're unhappy?"

"It's just... Difficult to be happy if you're hungry or cold, that's all I'm saying. You should think carefully before making such a big decision. I can't offer you much except hard work and..."

"And yourself. Your love, your companionship, your friendship and support. Don't sell yourself short, darling."

Funny how a pet name could make him feel so thrilled. But still, they weren't the only people in need of consideration.

"We'll need to do something about your mother. You've been her only purpose. She needs something to turn her mind to."

He wasn't sure he could live with making her so thoroughly unhappy, even if she had done terrible things to her son. Even if the idea of whisking Loki away to the hut to snuggle together on his straw mattress and cook together and wrangle the goats and kiss as the sun set and only grow more close and comfortable they grew old filled him with warm contentment.

"And how are you going to break it to Angerboda?"

"Oh, she's thrilled. I've never seen her as happy as she was when you reappeared. I think she has someone else in mind she'd much rather make eyes at."

She was very beautiful and nice enough from what he'd seen of her. There was probably a whole group of people she could choose from.

Loki finally deemed himself ready, his handsome clothes somehow managing to make Thor admiring and also give him a pang of guilt at the same time. The mountains had no place for such luxury. It was all warmth and bulk and durability up there.

He took Loki's offered arm all the same. Warm and solid. And human. Forever. And he'd helped with that.

Maybe Loki was right. Maybe he shouldn't be so down on what he offered. A steady love, a constancy. Maybe not the most exciting of lives, but one with fulfilment and warmth and laughter.

He just wished he didn't have to break a woman's heart to get it.

All the Queen wanted was to be loved. He understood that urge and he'd been lucky enough to have caring parents, good friends and now to have found someone he could imagine spending his life with. What did she have? How could they help?

They made their way outside, into the garden with all its regimented hedges and perfect rows of plants. Very beautiful, but Thor still thought he preferred things a little wild and free.

Loki's mother already looked like she was in mourning. Sorrowful. Like she knew there was no sense in fighting it.

Thor just became all the more determined to ease the parting.

It had rained a little, their feet leaving tracks in the grass as they walked in silence for half a turn, the Queen clearing her throat delicately.

"I wouldn't make you marry if it was my decision," she said. "But you know it is not. I cannot go against your father's rule."

"Then let me leave and be happy for me," Loki said.

A long sigh, which Thor seemed to feel within his very bones.

"I expect I will be, in time. Your young man certainly cares for you a lot."

Loki squeezed his arm lightly, giving him the courage to open his mouth and speak.

"You shouldn't hide yourself away in here, your Majesty," he said softly. "You have a lot of love to give, a lot of determination and strength. I could not bear it if I thought you were wasting away here alone. Please, turn your mind to other projects."

She blinked, owlishly.

"Like what?"

"Well, what have you an interest in?"

It seemed to be a difficult question. She had only seen herself in relation to her son for so long. It was hard to consider other things.

"I suppose I am interested in children," she said uncertainly. "In ensuring they are provided for."

"There are many children in the city," Loki said. "Perhaps in dire need of organised education. Or a guarantee of a hot meal."

It would take some time, no doubt, but Thor felt he could almost see ideas begin to take root in her like climbing vines.

"Besides," Thor said uncertainly. "It's not like we will never pass this way ever again. We could... visit."

She made him promise that.


	44. Chapter 44

If he'd thought Loki would become less clingy once things were more or less sorted out, he was grossly mistaken. It was like he was afraid it was a lie and they would be separated again if he relaxed fully for even a moment.

Every new luxury he saw made Thor worried. The clothes, the books, the _food..._

And then Loki insisted on taking him to his bed, his bedroom, lighting a few candles as they got ready for bed. Soft smile, bright eyes.

"Are you absolutely sure you can leave all this?" Thor asked.

Loki sighed and cuddled into him.

"I already said goodbye to it all when I left the first time."

"I just don't want you to regret anything, that's all."

"I made it through winter, didn't I? And I'll be able to help you now during the day. Two pairs of hands to take care of the goats and do repairs. You can teach me everything. Milking and growing turnips and everything."

"And you won't find it boring? Or too strenuous?"

A wicked giggle.

"How weak do you think I am that I couldn't do the work you started doing as an adolescent? Besides, I'll have you there. And you're very interesting indeed."

"Forever is a long time. I'll fade, you know. I'll become one of those fat old men you see in public houses muttering unintelligibly and occasionally coughing."

Loki laughed against his skin.

"Well, I'll be one if those thin beanpoles with hollow cheeks and I'll sit with you and mumble back."

That sounded much nicer than it ought to have, perhaps. Or maybe just the right amount.

Maybe they'd be muttering together about this night. A night of no rush, no need to get up early and the softest of beds.

It was still a little surreal to him that Loki wouldn't change into a goat in the morning. That he wanted to go home with him. Stay with him, in all his rustic unhygienic reality and raise goats for little return.

"I miss the hut," Loki murmured.

"Why?" Thor asked, surprised.

"I miss the silence. And the creaking. And the way the rain and the wind sound. And hearing the goats snoring."

"And the straw mattress?"

"Maybe not that. But another blanket on top of it to keep the stems inside. Maybe we could trim the goats in summer and use their hair to make it a little softer..."

It sounded good.

More than that, it sounded sustainable. Living and working together, facing new challenges and old together as a team.

"I'll make you a bookcase," Thor said. "And in the evenings you can read to me while I do darning or mending or whatever needs doing."

"Why not read for yourself?"

"Because I like your voice."

A hum of contentment, Thor beginning to feel the tug of sleep behind his eyes.

"I thought I was dreaming when I first heard you," Loki murmured, reaching down to link their fingers together.

"In the garden?"

"No, the first time. In the forest. In the snow. I'd completely lost my way, been wandering through the woods for days, sleeping out in the cold and regretting everything and then the snow came and I thought... I thought I was done for, really. And then I heard you grumbling to the goats, a person in the middle of nowhere, and I thought... risk it or freeze."

Thor rolled, wrapping his arms more tightly around him, inhaling the scent of his skin but not saying anything. He didn't have anything to say that Loki didn't already know.

"I'd never felt so safe before as I did in that hut."

"I hurt you the next night, though."

It had been a long time ago, but Thor still had a twinge of guilt over it.

"You didn't mean to. And you were clearly sincerely regretful. And then you looked after me, even though you didn't have to. And that's what I want. For us to look after each other."

"Alright," Thor said. "You've convinced me. But you need to promise that you'll tell me if there's anything you need or want or that's troubling you. So I can at least try to fix it."

He was almost asleep when Loki spoke again.

"There is one thing."

"Mm?"

"I was just wondering if you could teach me to yodel."


	45. Chapter 45

Thor woke to find Loki packing. Sorting through clothes, lips pursed. Considering things carefully.

"Mm. Going to make sure you always have clean clothes?"

"Most of them aren't suitable, but one or two of the shirts... And we can sell the others."

"Will they let you do that?"

"Not sure. I'm not planning to ask. They're my clothes. I'm a grown man, after all."

Fair enough. As everything had been decided for him his whole life, it was perhaps only natural to explore making his own decisions.

"When do you want to... leave?"

"Soon. Very soon. Today, if possible. No sense in drawing it out I don't think."

That was surprising in a way, Thor felt, and utterly not in others. Loki wanted to escape. To run away together.

"I brought a horse. I'm not sure if they still have it but..."

Loki looked up quickly from his work, eyes sparkling.

"A horse? I haven't been riding since I was a child. I always liked horses but mother was terrified I'd be thrown or kicked or something. And then... Well, goats don't exactly fit on saddles."

He was so excited. Thor grinned and opened his arms, encouraging Loki of come and nestle in them. Warm. Safe. The shape he was meant to be, that he wanted to be.

"You should enjoy this while you can," he said softly. "A lazy morning. It'll be early rising from here on out. Up before dawn, milking, getting the girls outside."

"Bathing together..."

"Mm..."

They were kissing, unrushed and with the freedom of knowing that they had a lifetime of such intimacy ahead of them, when the guard arrived, keeping his eyes averted.

"The Queen would like to invite you to breakfast."

"Were those her precise words?" Loki asked.

"The Queen would like to inform you that you are late for breakfast."

Chuckling against Thor's neck, Loki sighed.

"We will arrive presently."

Thor was nervous. What if she'd changed her mind? What if she wouldn't let Loki go freely after all?

She was smiling when they arrived. And actually eating, a pot of tea to her left and a pen in the hand not occupied with a spoon.

She looked... better. Like she was putting a brave face on things, yes, but also like she had found some real purpose too. Happier. Healthier, even.

"I barely slept," she said. "I've had the most wonderful idea. Sit, eat."

Fair enough. Loki chose one of the side chairs, possibly so they could sit next to one another, pouring tea for them both.

"I always thought my duty was to help you have a legacy," the Queen said. "And I was convinced that kingship was the only way to do that. But now... Well, look."

She pushed a piece of paper across the table, a list of addresses and ideas, circles around some of them. And at the top, the title...

"The Prince Loki Free School," Thor read.

"Isn't it wonderful? An opportunity for any and all children, an education and the certainty of hot food at midday. Nourishment for body and mind in your name."

Loki reached for the pen hesitantly.

"I think it a wonderful idea, Mother," he said. "Just that it's missing something."

He carefully added three words to the name and pushed it back.

"The Prince Loki... And Queen Farbauti Free School?"

"It will be your work. You ought to be noted for it. It's your legacy too, after all, moreso than mine."

She looked at it, smiling hesitantly.

"I, er... I thought I could announce it when your father names which of his children he plans to legitimise."

It was clearly something of a sore point, but she seemed determined to face it head on. Thor admired that. The strength to adjust.

"That makes sense."

Silence fell, slightly awkward.

"When do you think you'll leave?"

"Today."

Tight lips, and a nod.

"Could I write to you? Please?"

Loki took her hand across the space between them.

"Of course. Though... I'm not sure if Thor gets deliveries as such."

"Brunnhilde will take in mail for us," Thor said, reaching for the pen. "I'll give you her address."

"And you'll visit? When you're passing through?"

Thor's hand paused, waiting for Loki's reply. Surely they would?

"Of course. I'll want to see the school for one thing."

It felt somewhat intrusive to be here for what would be better as a private moment. After breakfast, Thor made a weak excuse about worrying he'd left a candle burning to give them time alone.

When Loki came back to his chamber, a couple of candles actually lit, he'd clearly wept. Reddened eyes. All partings were painful.

"Are you absolutely certain you want this?" Thor asked.

Loki sighed and smiled.

"Yes," he said firmly. "And stop asking. I want this. I want you. I want to live with you in your hut with your goats and love you. Now, how many books do you think we'll be able to carry?"

Well... That was fairly convincing.

They left after lunch, a couple of large, heavy bags on the horse's back. They'd have to walk, but that was alright.

It was good just to be together, outside in the fresh, warm air, birds singing and bees dancing from plant to plant. It helped Thor stop worrying about the reality they were heading towards. Stopped him thinking too much about the sadness in the Queen's eyes as they'd said goodbye.

By the time they decided to stop for the night in a small town, they were ravenous and exhausted, eating dinner for energy rather than taste before collapsing into a sleepy pile of limbs together.

Despite everything, Thor wasn't sure he'd ever slept so well before.


	46. Chapter 46

It would have been good to write ahead, but they didn't know Wanda's address so their arrival had to be a surprise. Only one bag now, having sold some of Loki's fancy clothes along the way.

The sound of goats filled Thor's heart with joy. Yes, he'd missed most of the season, yes he'd have more goats to handle than he usually did, but they had money enough now not to struggle and, besides, Loki was with him. That was enough to make things good, on balance, all by himself.

Brunnhilde was still there. Thor had thought she might have gone home, but perhaps she'd been afraid to leave without knowing for sure that he was safe. And Wanda had needed the help, even if her boys seemed older than they ought to have, all large, knowing eyes and wise expressions.

Slightly unnerving, though Thor didn't like to say so.

It was so wonderful to enter a house of smiles and friends, of hearty food and scrubbed tables, of herbs and threadbare lived-in comfort.

It had taken them four days and Thor was almost used to Loki always being human now. Sometimes Loki seemed to forget, though, yawning and half-unbuttoning his shirt in the morning before clearly remembering and smiling and usually giving Thor a kiss.

And they'd been learning about one another's bodies too. Thor had discovered how much Loki enjoyed being spoiled and doted on before anything more intense happened. Massages and hair washing, intimate touching that easily led into something else. And he'd learned just how sensitive his own neck was to kisses and even little nibbles.

It was lucky he wasn't carrying any marks really.

"You smell different," Wanda announced over dinner, one of her infants napping against her shoulder. "Now the curse is gone. You smell like... Like aired sheets. Fresh."

"Must be all the walking," Loki said. "I've well and truly been windswept."

"Thor not acting as a good shelter, then?" Brunnhilde asked.

"He's done a fine job of keeping me warm."

Thor chuckled, squeezing his hip under the table. They'd be sleeping down here, on the floor as they weren't planning on making Brunnhilde give up the couch. It was fun, telling her all that they'd done, about the new school. All camping out together.

Still, he wanted to be home. He wanted to settle into the routine of the day-to-day, the humdrum and boring. He wanted the ordinary and the dull and the difficult. And to meet all of that together.

They lent Brunnhilde their horse the next morning to ride home to her lady love, carrying their non-essentials with her. Wanda insisted she could cope by herself, that they ought to leave. Thor wondered if she knew somehow how badly he wanted to be in his own bed.

 _Their_ own bed.

Coming home after the season was often bittersweet. Good to be back, but knowing he'd miss his little affairs. Not this time, though.

And, of course, he had to sell a few more goats along the way. The males mostly. He didn't much like gelding work, even if done for good reasons. They always looked so accusatory afterwards...

The herd was bigger than he'd ever had it, but Loki insisted that with two of them, they could cope. And come autumn they could rent a male for breeding purposes perhaps. Ask around.

They'd work it out. Like they'd work everything out.

The hut teased them, a dot on the landscape that appeared and disappeared from view as they crossed familiar valleys. Growing larger and larger, little by little. So familiar and yet seeming so new now. Things were going to change.

Not least the weather, it seemed. Clouds that had been fluffs as light as his heart bubbled up into huge grey walls, rumbles of thunder echoing over the mountains.

"Are we going to get wet?" Loki asked.

"No. We're going to get absolutely drenched."

Despite running the last few hundred yards, they ended up soaked to the skin, laughing and mud spattered as they rushed the goats inside. No leaks in the roof at least, that was good.

Loki laughed, his hair dripping and springing into curls as he flopped into one of the chairs.

"Welcome home," Thor said, wringing out his coat.

"Mm. There's nowhere I'd rather be."


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did someone say switching?

"They're watching."

"Mm. No, they're not. They're not tall enough to see."

Thor's hands were running over Loki's back, his skin soft from a warm bath. It might have been easier to just sit the tub outside to fill, but Thor had been determined, taking pan after pan from the overflowing water butt inside to heat, keen to heat him up. In more ways than one.

"You said you'd go on top. You should be the one up here with judgemental goat eyes on you."

Chuckling, Thor rolled them, aware of the wet sound of oil between his legs. An enticement. A promise.

"They're not judgemental," he said, kissing Loki's chest. "Just curious. Besides, I've seen them in compromising positions often enough. Maybe it's only fair."

Loki stretched his arms above his head, every inch of him decadent and indulgent.

"Maybe I just wanted you like this," he said. "Where I can see all of you."

Mmm. Seemed about right.

"You haven't seen anything yet," Thor said, sitting up, his knees making the mattress dip either side of Loki's waist.

"Then show me."

That certainly sounded like he was ready. But Thor was in a mood to tease just a little, rolling his hips and letting Loki's cock catch against his entrance a few times before having mercy and angling it properly.

Loki was so instinctive that it was easy to forget he wasn't very experienced. As such, Thor was a little surprised by the loud gasp that rushed through him, the way his back arched upwards.

"Alright?"

"Ah! Oh..."

"Loki? Am I too heavy or...?"

"No! No, no, it's good. So... Ah, it's so warm..."

Mmm... It was difficult not to be smug that he could elicit such a reaction before he'd even done anything.

"Tell me when you want me to move. I'm so full like this. Can't wait to feel more."

Loki let out a soft cry, his fingers tight at Thor's thighs. When his eyes opened, they seemed huge in the candlelight, his mouth open and eager.

"Kiss me."

Thor didn't need much encouragement. And of course leaning down meant motion which meant Loki letting out a string of overwhelmed sounds against his lips. He was enjoying this and Thor still had plenty of tricks up his sleeves.

He rolled his hips slowly, luxuriating in the sensations, enjoying everything. This was what he liked best, the closeness, the intimacy. This was what he'd been accepting a pale imitation of year after year. Physicality with someone he loved.

Speeding up just slightly, he cupped Loki's cheek, grinning back at his blissful smile.

"I love you."

"How... Ah, how can you talk?"

It felt so good to laugh together, better to deliberately clench to make Loki moan.

"I like that sound. Like knowing I make you feel that good."

"Mmm..."

This was not going to last. There was too much happening, the lazy foreplay they'd indulged in during and after Loki's bath, the joy of being home and together, the novelty of this particular style.

He could feel Loki's rising desperation, both to finish and to hold on, and Thor knew which one he wanted. They could work on stamina later.

"Come on, darling. Let go for me. It's alright."

"More..."

"Not sure you can handle much more... Ah! Not just yet."

This was unfair, really. Loki didn't stand a chance as Thor swivelled his hips, so gratified by the sounds he was making, like sobs but good ones, his muscles tensing.

"Come on," Thor whispered. "I want to feel you let go."

A last, tight squeeze and Loki was done for, his nails catching just slightly on Thor's skin, moaning and trembling as Thor felt the unmistakable sensation of his completion.

He flopped afterwards, gasping for breath, but still knocking Thor's hand away as he reached for his own cock.

"Let me."

Lazy motions of his wrist were enough for Thor to spill, full of arousal and joy, feeling like he was glowing as he found the damp rag he'd placed nearby for the express purpose of a cursory clean-up.

"You are terrible," Loki said sleepily.

"How's that?"

"You've had too much practice. Didn't give me time to really savour it."

"Have to help you catch up then."

He blew out the candle and settled in for cuddles and kisses.

"The goats were definitely watching you know," Loki murmured.

"They were not! Besides... even if they were, they'll get used to the novety, I'm sure."

He fell asleep to Loki's giggles.


	48. Epilogue

There was a distinct scent of frost in the air. That strange tang, a sharpness. If there wasn't snow tonight, it was certainly not too far away.

Thor finished reinforcing the fence around the last few turnips, still growing but in need of harvest soon, sticking his tongue out at the goats' plaintive bleats.

"You'll get to eat them in time," he said. "But they're for later, you great sillies."

How low was the sun? Getting there. Nearly time to start herding them indoors. Easier with two people, of course, but if necessary he could manage.

As if by magic, the moment his thoughts turned to Loki, he heard him. The deep voice, ringing out. A sound that never failed to put joy in his heart. Not the world's most natural yodeller, but anything Loki lacked in experience was easily made up for in enthusiasm.

True of more than one thing, of course.

The water wouldn't be boiled in time, but Thor put a pan on to heat anyway. The horse made the trip down to the town and back again much quicker after all. And he was proud of the lean-to structure he'd built at the side of the hut for it to live in, even if it did mean they sometimes heard it snoring.

Loki had helped, of course. He had grown skilled at trimming and bundling straw for thatching, even making a few repairs to the main roof once he was done, grinning at the success of his own handiwork while Thor kissed every callous on his roughening fingers. It was wonderful, he said, to feel like he was doing something useful for himself, for both of them. Nevermind that he was also more or less in charge of their buying and selling nowadays.

The old ladies in the town loved him, apparently. A proper young gentleman, so polite and refined. If only they knew that he wasn't just named for the prince as they claimed...

Thor waved as Loki came into view, leaning forward to make the climb easier on the horse, even though he was likely barely visible. He liked waving. It felt good to be expecting someone, to be expected when he went out too.

Tea before they got the goats in or after? On the one hand, Loki would need warming up, but on the other having to go outside for a second time just as you'd got settled was terrible...

Afterwards. They could be quick about it. And then he could make dinner while Loki told him all about the day's news and gossip. It was their routine, keeping the goats at bay with a new interior fence and some table scraps and turnips.

He made a start, tethering one beast at a time to encourage inside, stopping only to properly welcome Loki home with a kiss, the horse safely under cover and probably already starting on its dinner.

"I have a present for you," Loki said.

"Oh?"

"Yes. But you have to wait till after we eat."

A tease, but Thor was patient. Of course he was.

They managed to get the goats in before the first flakes of snow fell, turned almost orange by the sunset. And if Thor wasn't mistaken, Loki had some beautiful gloves on. Soft leather, but not brown or black as he might have expected but a deep, midnight blue.

"Sif's dyeing experiments are going well, then?"

Loki showed off his hands proudly.

"They're not to keep. I'm helping, giving the process some rigorous testing. Apparently the first ones ran as soon as they got wet."

Not having to traipse up the mountain to collect milk and tanning resources had given Brunnhilde and Sif more time to focus on their business and new innovations. While the plain ladies' gloves were popular, Sif was still certain that it would be possible to manufacture them in a wide range of colours.

"I think it's nearly a year since we met, you know," Loki said as Thor sliced some bread to go with the peppery broth they were eating.

"Is it?" Thor asked, like he hadn't been counting.

Part of him still couldn't believe his luck that Loki wanted to be with him, kept waiting for something to go wrong. More than once, he'd woken up a little earlier than Loki and taken a moment just to gaze at him in disbelief before quietly getting up to make tea.

"It's milder than it was then," Loki said. "Must have been a particularly harsh winter. But I think it is about that time."

"And has it been a good year?"

"On the whole. And the last six months especially. I'm free. I get to see the results of my labour every day. I live with someone who cares for me and who I care for in return. What more could I ask for?"

"A more comfortable mattress?"

"The first layer of goat hair has worked wonders though, hasn't it? But no, my point is that I was thinking over how to mark it, what little thing might please us and struggling to think of anything at all. But then it came to me. Something I would like very much."

"What? Name it."

A long, slow smile.

"Your present."

Thor chuckled.

"You bought a gift for me that's secretly a gift for you?"

"You'll like it too! And besides, I didn't buy it. I commissioned it. In a way. Suggested it."

Now he simply had to know, holding out his palm insistently.

Loki reached into the pocket of his coat and slowly drew out his hand, a small bundle concealed within.

"I said we'd put it on one of the goats to see how it coped with being used outside, but, well... They don't need to know."

He laid a piece of leather in Thor's hand. A thin strip in a deep shade of red.

A new collar.

Thor practically felt his cheeks heat with excitement. The only thing his Loki could think of to want was a reminder of their first time, a mark of their passion. The first time they had thought of one another as lovers instead of friends.

A sense of belonging together.

Lifting his hair, Thor put it on, feeling the soft leather against his skin, the cool metal of the clasp.

And then he looked at Loki, the prince who wanted to be a herdsman, who somehow out of all the world had decided to share this life with him, despite the hardship and hard labour and discomfort of it.

It filled him with emotions he felt unable to express.

"I love you," he said, since that was the most important one.

"Truly?"

"Yes, Loki. Truly."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... that's that. Happy men and happy goats forever. And finally the important plot point of the gloves is mostly resolved!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and for your comments and kudos along the way. I really do treasure them.


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